7yo dd was told at swimming pool to wear the top part of her bikini

[vacaloca]

I sent the kids to a holiday club today where they have a pool. They were wearing the bottom part of a bikini and the 7yo (very skinny as well) was told to wear the top part of her bikini tomorrow. I think that's just weird and I'm feeling a bit upset about it. AIBU?

[festi]

because a 7 year old does not need to accessorise her breasts

[ilovejondanby]

my local pool insists that girls wear all in one costumes - its probably to cover them from accusations etc, which is a shame but does seem to be the way it is now

[DinahRod]

When last on holiday abroad lots of women of all ages were topless on the beach [shrug] but will admit to feeling slightly uncomfortable when it was young female teens (10-14 yrs) who were just in bikini bottoms. Maybe it was just me who feels that way, but wouldn't want dd to go topless at that age.

But am surprised at the anti-bikini sentiment on here. DD presently wears all in ones but I didn't realise bikinis were such a no-no.

[worraliberty]

I agree with exoticfruits

People can't have it both ways. People do tend to get hysterical and untrustworthy around adults who work with children...and can often be heard questioning their motives. They can also often be heard clutching their pearls because someone has dared to take a photograph of their precious offspring.

Rules like this and the rule that prevents us taking photos of our kids enjoying a swim, are brought about by those kind of parents unfortunately.

[ProcrastinatorGeneral]

I'd love a one piece for my son. At four, if his nipples are out he will play with them >_<

My 8 year old daughter likes tankini efforts, she hasn't achieved NVQ level 5 is contortionism so finds most of the swimsuits that will stay on her shoulders (narrow shouldered minnie she is) tricky to get out of for a pee.

I would never have put her in only half the set though. Purely bcause it would never have occured to me. Two bits on hanger, two bits in swim bag, two bits on child.

[LynetteScavo]

And bikinis make going to the loo so much much easier.

[ReshapeWhileDamp]

Does it really need to be spelt out why some people find pre-pubescent girls in bikinis a bit iffy, lovemysleep? Girls that young don't have breasts. They almost certainly haven't hit puberty yet. They don't have anything to cover up. Pretending that they do is icky.

OP, I'll join the crowd of people who are surprised that a 7 yo is in a bikini in the first place.

I spent the 70's in a pair of towelling short shorts on the beach (no idea if they were intended as a swimming costume, suspect they were sold as boys' trunks) and I think I stopped wearing them at about 8 or so. Nobody batted an eyelid.

[Maternelle]

I cannot believe the number of people wo think wearing a bikini bottom is wrong.
I find it sick. Why should a child cover up non-existent breasts? Weird.
YANBU

[BranchingOut]

The swimming instructor told a little girl the same thing when I took a class of children swimming (children younger than 7).

I had been getting the boys changed so hadn't seen what she was wearing until she emerged at the poolside, but I would probably have come to the same decision. The rules for school swimming groups generally state 'one-piece'.

[borderslass]

My DD's are now 15 and 20 and have always worn bikinis just like I did as a child, the only place i've come across anyone thinking little girls wearing bikinis is wrong is on here.

[Nanny0gg]

My girls (many years ago) wore two piece cozzies as small children. I'm fairly sure I had one too when I was little (back before time began).
Crop-top style and nothing remotely unsuitable about them.
What is the problem?

[festi]

pants also make going to the toilet easier, why even cover up the top half

[lovemysleep]

Have never understood the policies and issues around children being filmed or photographed either - I've also been fortunate that DD has gone to nurseries and schools that are sensible about this, and don't restrict any filming or photos.

It's some kind of crazy hysteria that seems to suggest that paedophiles are lurking everywhere.....they aren't, we just hear about it more now due to the media.

All of this has made people so nervous and distrustful - which is such a shame...

[thisisyesterday]

""but i wore both parts of it... cos, why wouldn't you??"

Well - because a 7 year old has nothing to put IN the top bit does she? Her chest is no different to a little boy, and we're not asking them to cover their nips up."

well no, but kids bikinis are not designed to have things put in anyway are they?

my point is that as a child, when i was given a bikini, i would automatically have wanted both parts of it. just because that's what you do with a bikini iyswim. i wouldn't, and neither would my mother, have made a thing about how i shouldn't need the top bit or whether or not i should wear it. i just did

[NoNoNoMYDoIt]

indeed, Maternelle

my DD is 2 and swims in a reusable swim nappy. she is one of the few of her age in the swimming pool NOT in a swimming costume tho. hopefully, they don't sell bikinis for 2yr olds, but i am in no rush to cover her up. am happy for her to prance around in the buff on the beach (with adequate SPF coverage from suncream). why should i cover her up in the pool?

[southeastastra]

mine was a red triangle bikini in 1976 what a harlot i must have looked

[southeastastra]

(though i probably looked very conservative next to my sister's knitted bikini)

[dolldaggabuzzbuzz]

YANBU!

[squeakytoy]

I wore a bikini when I was about 7 or 8. There are family photos of me in the paddling pool.. it wasnt remotely suggestive, it was just clothing. I find it weird that people can see anything wrong with a child wearing one actually.

[EssexVic]

y shouldnt a 7 yrs old wear a bikini?? U'll b saying that kids shouldnt b allowed to toddle about in the nude in their own garden incase people are looking out of their windows next!!!!! I see nothing wrong in in kids & adults alike enjoying the sun topless, however, topless etiquite for children & adults alike do dicate tops to be put on fro swimming & eating!

[LynetteScavo]

Because it looks cute...just like flowery hats look cute on little girls, and so do summer skirts. They don't have to wear them (DD chooses not to, and would rather wear a baseball cap and shorts) but personally I think a flowery, frilly bikini can look really sweet.

Not a big deal if girls do or don't wear them...I'm just amazed that so many people see any bikini as something sexual.

[Sidge]

I never understand the anti-bikini brigade.

It's just a two part swimsuit. Why the outrage? Why the shock and horror that a child is showing their abdomen and nipples? Why are you all making out that a bikini is some sort of sexy attire? It's just a swimsuit with the middle part missing.

I agree with borderslass - MN is the only place I have ever come across the view that children wearing bikinis is wrong.

[Maternelle]

One-pieces are not that comfortable. Wet fabric on your stomach.
I absolutely hate seing toddlers with a bra on, which is what a bikini top is.
It's just preposterous.

[vacaloca]

I'm back after posting and running. Funnily enough the bikinis they have are the first two Boden ones in the link above. This is got to be a cultural thing. Last year we went to Spain and my girls were the only two in the beach wearing swimsuits. A little girl actually came over to ask them why they were wearing swimsuits. We went back to Spain this year and they put the bikinis (both parts) on. My mother (Spanish) had one look at them and asked why the hell they were wearing the top bit when they have no breasts yet. I looked around and true enough most girls their age were only wearing the bottom part. So all summer, in Spain and France, they've been wearing the pants bit. Today they had swimming at this holiday club in the morning and swimming lesson at a different pool in the afternoon so I kept the swimsuit for their swimming lesson and took the bikini for the morning club. I asked DD if she wanted to take both parts and she said no. She's now asking why they've told her to put the top bit tomorrow. I haven't made a fuss about it, I said she can take the swimsuit tomorrow.

The weird thing for me is for little girls to wear something that effectively looks like a bra.

[Sirzy]

But wearing a bikini isn't being topless is it? As pp said to me it's like wearing a bra which at that age I would also see inappropriate. At the age of 7 a vest is all that is needed not a bra/crop top so why would it be different when swimming? Tankis or swimsuits much more appropriate IMO.

I have no problem seeing children running around naked or just in shorts (although I can understand why the request has been made in the case of op) but I don't like bikinis on young girls