to want to knock this little fuckwit's head off

[knobbysEx]

Boy on our street, 5 years old. KEEPS hittin, swearing at and spitting on my 3 year old ds. He's then lied to his parents about his behaviour and they have taken his side. Even though they know he's a little horrible fuckwit.

I've been out, spoken to him many times, spoken to the parents, banned him from my garden (then lifted the ban when he apologised, then banned him again for further fuckwit behaviour)
He's the youngest of 4 kids aged 5 - 9years in a workless household, parents never do a thing with the kids, just spend the benefit money on fags and takeaways as far as I can see. They just seem resigned to his behaviour whenever I've complained, and say "I know, I know..."

Latest problem, my dcs, aged 10, 8 and 3 playing on the front, this kid yday shouted "fuck off" on my 3 y o's face. My 10yo dd said "don't say that" and she got the finger. I went out and asked him if he wanted to be friends with my children, why is he swearing, why won't he answer when I'm speaking to him.... I got an insolent glare to everything I said, so I just sent him home. Dad comes out accusing me of shouting at his kid, blah blah blah (I didn't, I'd bloody well admit it if I did) and tells me I should get off my arse, shouldn't be sat inside all day, should be out watching my kids!! I GO TO WORK ALL DAY!!!!!!! TRY IT!

Anyway, I was so mad, I banned my kids from playing with the fuckwit, but today they were playing out - not with the boy - and the boy has grabbed my 3 y o's leg out from under him as he was walking past (there is a large green area outside the house where they play) and hurt his head. He then went straight home before I was summoned.

I just feel so fucking IMPOTENT that I can't go out there and grab this little fucking reprobate by the scuff of his neck and tell him the next time he touches my dc, I'll fucking rip his fucking head off!
AIBU? And more to the point, WHAT CAN I DO???
The parents just don't give a damn.

It is perfect. It suits pagwatch.

Pagwatch lacks massive toned dancer thighs though

Unless the OP lives in the middle of a massive field I assume there is road access to the houses awaits the OP returning to explain that she does live in a massive field actually

With children like this around I simply wouldn't let my 3 yo play out. He sounds like a detestable little runt but then he would be with that example to follow. YANBU, but I think the only answer to "what can I do" is keep him in. 3 yo is a bit young.

"Unless the OP lives in the middle of a massive field I assume there is road access to the houses awaits the OP returning to explain that she does live in a massive field actually "

Oh give it a rest, surely you've all ripped her to shreds enough already by now? I'm sure she got the collective point about the dangers of 3 year olds playing outside quite a while ago

Yikes!

I get your anger but it is very misdirected. The parents are the issue here not the child. I am going to take your rant as your inner voice coming out because of anger but you sound very harsh on this little boy. I would be equally as upset in all honesty, but you really need to take this attitude towards the childs parents and see the child as innocent and almost equally as affected by his parents negligence as your own child is as a result.

Wasn't actually talking to you Celia - was responding to a pp who said there was no mention of cars so feel free to wind your neck in.

Oh perleese!...You make it sound like she's thrown him out onto the M4 to play... it's clear it's a very quiet residential cul de sac with lots of other kids (and their parents)around looking out onto a communal green in the middle! Really, we've got to stop wrapping kids up in cotton wool and let them play on their own or they'll never learn to negotiate the world and assess risks for themselves - and yes that does include a 3 yo in this context - of course within limits, but as she's said several times she is watching them - just not constantly.

I agree the only answer here is to keep him in or don't let him out of sight for a second, but the fact is she shouldn't have to. I am also inclined to feel sorry for the bleeder in question as you are right it's a lot to do with the parenting he isn't getting, but I am also aware that there are some children that are just plain nasty, for whatever reason, no matter what you do... sorry if that's not PC.

Oh that's fine then - as long as kids don't get hit by cars doing 70 + they don't get injured obviously .
Just because a lot of parents are watching the kids it doesn't mean that at any given time ANYONE is watching them. If the parents/older kids in this communal arrangement were keeping a good eye on the kids then why is her 3 yo being repeatedly hit, sworn and spat on?
Anyway there is no point in me saying anymore on this thread as anyone who thinks it's OK to leave kids and maybe other parents watching their 3 yo in the street is clearly from a different planet to me and I'm sure neither side will be convinced they are being U.

Some kids are fuckwits. Where you live OP sounds quite a bit like where I live, and some of the kids round here-utter fucking fuckwits.
I would never in a million years let a three year old out to play on my street supervised (or not) by my other kids.
Take some responsibility!!

maybe the child got the swearing from you, just a thought!

Yes agree to differ is the way to go I think as we will never agree on this subject. It is impossible to watch your kids EVERY minute of the day no matter how good your intentions. Sweeping statements which skim over the facts are really a waste of time here. The incidents she mentioned happened when her back was turned or she was distracted. I'm impressed if none of you have ever been distracted while watching your kids. I just hope none of you are ever in this position - she clearly wanted some real advice and support, not a barrage of condescending insults and criticism. There are ways to convey that you disagree and to give useful advice without resorting to this.

Personally, I'm more than happy with the way my kids have grown up with a proper idea of how to deal with the world, not over protected and constantly fearful yet knowing I am there to protect them if needs be. No I cannot say they will never be picked on, or mown down by a bad driver, nobody can. I do know that they will take care of each other and are well prepared for negotiating both busy streets and sad nasty bullies and that they have grown into confident, happy and likeable teenagers who can find their way in the world. I like my planet.

Me too.
There is a difference between being distracted and choosing to distract yourself by going inside and leaving your kids to it.
I don't think kids should be overprotected but out alone at 3. Would 2 be OK - genuine question btw.
There are few people on this thread who think that not allowing a 3 yo out without an adult is overprotective. You can teach your children about the world without just leaving them to get on with it while they're still so small.

The irony of you ranting and swearing and threatening violence towards a 5 year old child for his bad behaviour is well...ironic.

Sounds as if you behave as badly as he does.

OK. Out alone? Clearly not the case here - yeah 2 is fine to go down pub alone (joke btw before the insults start!). The 3yo wasn't without an adult, nor left to just get on with it.

What I'm saying is don't skim over the facts as OP has given them. Yes she was ranting, but not AT the 5yo - nor was she threatening violence towards him or swearing at him. She was clearly at the end of her rope and venting on MN - isn't that what it's here for? I just think some of the people on this thread are being overly aggressive towards her instead of offering constructive criticism and advice. Just for the record I think fuckwit is a great expressive word with which to vent. That doesn't mean I would tell a 5 yo he is one!