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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think lots of people are "heightist"?

162 replies

MardyBra · 04/07/2011 09:07

On the MiL from hell thread someone stated that the groom wasn't much of a catch because he was a short-arse. I'm shortish and my DH is v short for a bloke. Doesn't make us (automatic) mingers. Why do some tall people have a misplaced sense of superiority.

OP posts:
TrilllianAstra · 04/07/2011 09:09

Short people got no reason
Short people got no reason
Short people got no reason
To live

They got little hands
Little eyes
They walk around
Tellin' great big lies
They got little noses
And tiny little teeth
They wear platform shoes
On their nasty little feet

Well, I don't want no short people
Don't want no short people
Don't want no short people
`Round here

QuincyMincemeat · 04/07/2011 09:11

poison comes in small bottles*

*disclaimer, I'm 5'2"

TrilllianAstra · 04/07/2011 09:12

1 - how old are you to use the word "minger"?

2 - it's only men who are considered less of a catch for being short, short women are not considered less attractive or desirable

3 - short men aren't considered ugly (I take it that's what you mean by minger) but it is assumed that in a relationship the man will always wish to be taller and the woman will always wish to be shorter

4 - if you are short then well done for having a short DH - if it's true that men must always be taller than women within a relationship then there should be a rule saying that short women must go out with short men and not take a man who is taller than they need Wink

Bonsoir · 04/07/2011 09:13

I think it's an advantage to be tall - lots of studies show correlations between being tall and being rich, for example. It's not prejudice, it's fact. But being tall is not the be all and end all of personality, character and life advantage!

MayorNaze · 04/07/2011 09:15

i am just under 5'4. it would be nice to be a bit taller

my friend (female) is 6'0. she wishes she were a bit smaller

everyone is different

anonacfr · 04/07/2011 09:16

Fish's uncle's song!!!!
Good times.... Grin

Bunbaker · 04/07/2011 09:17

I also think that people are heightist about very tall people. It cuts both ways.

Back in the old days short people were considered unhealthy because it usually indicated a poor diet lacking in nutrients. We are getting taller with each generation due to improved diet. So, back then marrying someone short probably wasn't considered a good catch.

We are all tall and lanky, but I put that down to lack of sunlight where we live Grin

Original poster
MardyBra · 04/07/2011 09:17

Triilian I'm in my 40s. Was using the word "minger" ironically.

OP posts:
Original poster
MardyBra · 04/07/2011 09:20

Bonsoir. I agree it's been shown that tall people earn more and but there have been no studies to show they are more intelligent or adept. So it must be society's prejudice.

OP posts:
deliciousdevilwoman · 04/07/2011 09:20

I will admit to being heightest. I am 5'2 and would not have a relationship with a short man, however lovely. DH is 6'2. I just don't find short men physically attractive. I don't wish to be taller myself, btw.

Bonsoir · 04/07/2011 09:22

MardyBra - but if we base our belief on generations of tall people earning more, that is of itself fact, not prejudice, IYSWIM.

Bonsoir · 04/07/2011 09:23

There have also been studies to show that good looks correlate with intelligence.

TrilllianAstra · 04/07/2011 09:23

lots of studies show correlations between being tall and being rich, for example. It's not prejudice, it's fact

Bonsoir does that mean that men being paid more than women is not prejudice or discrimination but just fact?

If everyone has unconscious positive associations then tall people may get better promotions, better pay rises, do better in business deals because of this. So it could be both fact and prejudice.

Mardy - when I was at school minger meant ugly. No-one thinks that short = ugly. Less desrirable as a partner because you can't wear heels and things like that, maybe. Ugly, no.

GingerWrath · 04/07/2011 09:23

I am very small, 4'11", it can be a pain in the arse sometimes. But I fit in clothes for age 11-12 so no VAT for me.

I get IDed quite often even though I am approaching my forties because people see my height first and not my wrinkles Grin

Original poster
MardyBra · 04/07/2011 09:27

Shit. I've got to go out unexpectedly probably for most of morning but will be back to the thread later. BTW I find Trillian's song quite offensive. Sorry got to dash.

OP posts:
noddyholder · 04/07/2011 09:27

I am only 5'5 and dp is 5'8 and we are gorgeous Grin

Sirzy · 04/07/2011 09:30

I'm 5ft and other than high shelves and needing trousers shortened I have never had any issues.

People make jokes, I laugh them off, not something that bothers me and certainly never experienced anything I would call "heightism"

HooverTheHamaBeads · 04/07/2011 09:39

I'm 5'3 and DH is 6'1. Can make kissing standing up difficult as I can get neck-ache.

Ex was about 5'10, that did seem about the right height for me.

I do not fancy guys who are my height or only a little taller than me. Not sure why really. Just don't.

I'd love to be a couple of inches taller but hey ho, that's life.

NeedaCostume · 04/07/2011 09:39

I think people judge others on all aspects of their looks, including height, but I don't think people are 'heightist' as such. Perhaps tall people feel more confident in the workplace and this affects their promotion prospects?

Privately though, it can be hard to be a tall woman. I am 5'8" and always used to wish I were a bit shorter, especially because I fancy men who are quite a bit taller than me. When I was younger I felt huge and un-feminine and ungainly. I think my mum gave me a bit of a complex because she is 5'4" and went on and on about me being giant and that I would never find a bloke. DH is 6'2".

My cousin is the same height as me and her DH is 5'2". They have been married for 14 years and have two kids who are also shortish for their age. They are not ugly and as far as I'm aware it hasn't affected them negatively.

ConstantVigilance · 04/07/2011 09:51

I'm 5'2 and I found Trillian's song funny! Grin

My partner is a tiny bit bigger than me but he's a jockey so his height is a good thing.

Fifis25StottieCakes · 04/07/2011 09:56

I had this on a thread discussing childrens weight when i said my kids dads 6ft1 and 9 st 6.

TrilllianAstra · 04/07/2011 09:56

It's not my personal song, and the songwriter didn't intend it to be taken seriously.

Newman often writes lyrics from the perspective of a character far removed from Newman's own experiences, sometimes using the point of view of an unreliable narrator. One of his biggest hits, "Short People" was written from the perspective of "a lunatic" who hates short people.

GeekCool · 04/07/2011 10:00

My DH is 6'5 and his best mate is 6'8. When they go out, invariably someone tries to have a pop at them and start by saying to them 'bet you think you're hard because your tall'. It's pathetic. Some people do have a chip about their height.

justpaddling · 04/07/2011 10:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AmazingBouncingFerret · 04/07/2011 10:02

Up until a couple of months ago I was 5 foot.
An operation made me 2 inches taller but no where near what I was supposed to be.

I think DH must be an exception to Bonsoirs theory. He is less than average height for a man but extremely good looking and very successful. Grin