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Original poster

to not get why some women feel 'cheated' on when they find porn

344 replies

M0naLisa · 01/07/2011 11:28

Now I know most porn threads turn into a debate and article about why porn is wrong on many levels. I understand that part!!

BUT what I don't understand is why some women feel like there husband has cheated on them when they find porn mags, websites, etc

He's not shagging those in the films/mags whatever, so why do women get obsessed when it comes to their bloke watching porn films/sites or buying mags?

OP posts:
Cocoflower · 02/07/2011 19:28

Far too much- because it happens to be published in the most sexual famous book aimed at women you can buy in bloddy waterstones and the biggest free website?! Righto.

That must mean I also know far too much about cupcakes because I owned a book with a cupcake section in and I also go on these free receipe websites and they had a cupcake section on!

What a daft comment.

Shame I didnt know then Indigo you could have had my copy for free. Seriously what the hell did you find in there to entertain you?!

Indigojohn · 02/07/2011 19:32

What do I find to entertain me in hundreds of Women's Sexual Fantasies? Hmm

And hundreds of men's?

Gosh, I really don't know.

Cocoflower · 02/07/2011 19:34

Hmm, well they are pretty sick ones.

floosiemcwoosie · 02/07/2011 19:35

Coco for someone who dislikes porn as much as you do, you sure know a lot about erotic literature.

Cocoflower · 02/07/2011 19:37

This is crazy! Because I read one book and looked at one website this equates too a lot.

I can think of no other example of where looking breifly at two sources equals 'a lot'.

Well in my younger days I experimented a lot sexually. Especially when single.

Thats how I know whats NOT for me obviously!

Indigojohn · 02/07/2011 19:38

Coco, nope, not at all. If incest and animals ain't your thing, you don't need to read those sections. It's all clearly titled to help you . Smile

Plenty of other stuff to get off to read about in there.

I do think you are sounding a little prudish now Coco. I'm imagining you lifting your nightie and bracing yourself. Wink

floosiemcwoosie · 02/07/2011 19:41

I think your gettin your knickers in a twist Coco (pardon the pun)

Indigojohn · 02/07/2011 19:41

In your younger days? Grin Aren't you about 20?

You won't believe this now, but if you are lucky in twenty or so years time you'll be saying, " Ye gads, that old bint on MN was right!"

But really, REALLY great sex comes later in life. Women really don't reach their peak until late thirties/forties. Grin

Or men. Wink

Cocoflower · 02/07/2011 19:42

The whole book was sick. I showed the guy I was seeing at the time who was hardly 'prude' and even he thought it was pretty screwed up too. The whole thing is nasty and perverted.

I will take prude anyday trust me. Much prefable, so prude I proudly am.

Indigojohn · 02/07/2011 19:47

Which book was it?

What is sick about fantasising about window cleaners or threesomes or waiters?

Really, is that what you call sick?

Malificence · 02/07/2011 19:54

There is some brilliant free erotic lit available for Kindle.
DH knows exactly what I like to read, spanking and mild domination mainly, but if he was in any way upset or disgusted by it, I wouldn't read it, it's as simple as that, respect for your partner's feelings should always be a priority in a good relationship.
What I really don't understand, is why a man would continue using porn if he knows that his partner is disgusted by it ( and in turn disgusted by him )and that she loses respect for him, any decent man would surely feel deeply ashamed that he made his wife feel like that?
Being in a relationship means that the individuals don't get to do exactly as they please ( especially if it means hurting their partner/harming the relationship) - a good marriage involves a certain level of compromise.

Cocoflower · 02/07/2011 19:57

Indigo it doesnt even make sense what your saying.

If your sex life got so much better when you got older then why resort to having to get off looking at other people? That doesnt sound like it got better at all.

Malificence · 02/07/2011 20:07

I agree that really fabulous, mind blowing sex doesn't come until your forties, but I'm quite happy to say that porn has played absolutely no part in shaping our sex life, it has evolved naturally over many years.
My DH is definitely a red blooded male who enjoys looking at gorgeous female bodies, he was very impressed by Lucy Lawless in Spartacus, almost as impressed as I was by Andy Whitfield Wink but we didn't have to watch them having real sex to find it arousing, imagination is a much more powerful tool.

I can understand why a man who isn't having regular, fulfilling sex with his wife might resort to porn use, but such a lot of these sad gits seem to prefer sneaking off to wank to porn to having a mutually satisfying sexual experience with a willing woman.
Porn does not enrich peoples sex lives, it harms intimacy and damages natural sexual arousal for another human being.

Crosshair · 02/07/2011 20:15

I know nothing about cupcakes either, so yes compared to me you seem to know an awful lot about cupcakes. You sound very tense.

Cocoflower · 02/07/2011 20:16

You sound a little dim.

Indigojohn · 02/07/2011 20:17

Malificence - I actually agree.

I know DH will look at porn sometimes when working away but not at home . It wouldn't bother me at home but certainly would if it were a substitute or a secret.

Coco. My DH isn't always at home. Wink
When he's here, funnily enough I don't need to whip out Nancy.

Still always room for a bit of Sparty, though Grin

floosiemcwoosie · 02/07/2011 20:17

crosshair - maybe she needs a good.....cupcake

Cocoflower · 02/07/2011 20:21

Maybe you need some good manners. Joining a thread 13 pages on to personally attack someone is very low.

Crosshair · 02/07/2011 20:25

If having no knowledge on incest lit or cupcake recipes makes me dim, then yes I am indeed dim.

floosiemcwoosie · 02/07/2011 20:31

Put down spartacus and pick up Thor....what that boy can do with his hammer is nobodies business.

Coco if you think that is a personal attack, then you have lived a very sheltered life. When discussing manners you might want to reflect on some of your own comments "your a bit dim". Lighten up

Cocoflower · 02/07/2011 20:34

Are you going to post anything of any use with maybe a chance to redeem yourself?

Cocoflower · 02/07/2011 20:35

And it is bad manners and very odd to follow someone round a thread making childish comments.

Why? What do you possibly get out of it?

Cocoflower · 02/07/2011 20:38

I very much agree with your last paragraph Malifence.

DH did used to use porn with his ex girlfriends during sex and solo as he didnt find them satisfying enough so needed the other women to focus on

Crosshair · 02/07/2011 20:47

Oh snap!