Dh wants to go to a music festival the weekend before the kids are back at school

[TheRhubarb]

It's some music festival down in Devon and his favourite band The Fall are playing of whom he has followed since he was about 12 although they are a crock of shite in my opinion.

The only reasons I am against this is because he'll be away 3 nights and will be taking the Friday off work, so we won't see him that entire weekend and I was hoping, as it's the weekend before dd starts secondary school, that we could do something nice with her as a family.

It will cost £145 plus spending money (although he is planning to take food and drink with him). We've just moved house and I could plough that money into any one of the numerous jobs that need doing.

Jealousy. I've never ever been to a festival in my life and know of no-one who would ever go with me, so I'm a bit peeved off that he gets to play at batchelor man at festival whilst I'm at home with the kids all weekend.

Also I do a lot with the kids. I'll be with them for the entire summer holidays whilst trying to juggle my job and I do often take them both away to different cities for a night staying in a Travelodge or Premier Inn as a treat and something they can do with just me, whereas he almost never spends anytime with them by himself.

I know I could book a weekend off to visit Custy, which I plan to do anyway, but this is more than a night out for him.

I can't really say no without feeling utterly childish and selfish but part of me IS utterly childish and selfish! So I am being unreasonable if I said no aren't I?

even if you have to drive them to a scheme it will be worth it. tehre has to eb soemthing running within 30 or 40 minutes - google your area plus holiday courses
call all the local sports centres within reach to ask what courses they run in holidays - whether couple hours trampolingin or full day multisports activities

drama classses like stagecoach nationally
etcetc

go to coundil play service website or call council for lsit of registered holiday schemes
ask around other kids at school etc.

Re summer hols: My two are going to a sports day camp for one week. Then they are going to my mom's for a (nearly) week (worth the 300 mile round trip so I get a few days of uninterupted work time) and I am arranging play date swaps for one week so I get half the time to myself (and TBH I find it's easier when they have someone here to play with). Any of those ideas worth a try?

I agree with last two posters. There must be something during the day for them to do, even for a couple weeks out of the six or whatever (it's eight weeks here in Canada.) Ds1 is 8 and he is doing one week of canoe camp (just mornings), a music camp for a week in my parents' town, he'll stay with them for the first time, and the rest of the time we're either away or all going to the lake etc. (he has much younger siblings and I don't work from home!)

End of the Road? It's a great festival. Very family friendly and not rowdy/druggy. We're going to it, hopefully without kids, but maybe we'll have to take them. Just before DS1 starts primary school. You definitely don't want to go too?

sounds like he needs to grow up & become a parent. Unfortunately that can take some longer then others. You are in a no win situation if he goes you will be unhappy, if you ask him to stay he will be unhappy. You have to hope that he realises for himself that its the wrong thing to do. Good luck

The festival you're talking about is End of the Road, on the Dorset/Wiltshire borders. It's a shame you can't go as a family, because it's actually a really nice festival for kids - the capacity is only 5,000, there's tons for kids to do, and lots of kids there (in fact, on its messagboard there are often childless adults complaining it's too child-friendly), and you can drive off site to the seaside or Monkeyworld or the tank museum in the mornings.

I'd be surprised if your DH's mate got away with smoking crack there. It's really not that kind of event. A couple of years ago someone was smoking a spliff right by my kids and one of the stewards moved him along with a "we know people are going to smoke weed at a festival, but don't do it where there are children or you'll be removed.

Puzzletree - the kids' tickets are all sold out now.

End of The Road looks good this year. You need to start getting away though, Rhubarb.

I find myself going to the ATP festivals, not because I want to go to a festival (though it's my sort of music) but because I need to get away and this gets me out for a few days and there are people I can go with. H stays at home with the kids, takes the Mon/Fri off work so I can go.

I find it hard to prioritise myself, and I know that sounds trite, it really does, but it's true. I find it hard to stop the guilt every time I go out alone. But I'm fighting through it

AllFallDown we've got tickets, booked as soon as we got back last year! But hopefully will be able to give our kids ones away nearer the time. They've got bigger this year but still hoping it'll be the relaxed lovely event it was before. The line-up is brilliant too!

Wow, thanks for all the messages

Tickets for kids sold out unfortunately and yes it is that festival so watch out for him eh? Now he has not only that but he announces the same month he and a few friends are doing the coast to coast bike ride which will take a few days too (?)

I'd love to go to a festival so who's up for it or am I too late?

You can still get tickets for Latitude which looks quite good. Line-up is decent, and there's loads of arty and comedy things going on. I think you can still get some other tickets this year - it's only really Glasto that sells out so far in advance.

I'm off to ATP this December. Bit cold last year, but smaller and a better line up for me.

There are tickets still available for Larmertreefestival. we have been going since dd was 3 and she is 9 now. Wouldn't miss it for anything! Music is always fantastic, setting is beautiful, loads for kids to do, and toilets that have won awards! Come and join us, but get in quick as tickets are going fast.

I'm arranging a Bath meet-up with Custy and a few friends and have just heard some bad news from a friend who lives in Hastings so I might go and spend a few days with her. Thanks for the offers though.

Kids during holidays - I usually try to book them in somewhere if there are some free activities going around but there aren't that many that cater for both a 7yo and a, by then, 11yo. Getting rid of both of them at the same time is mighty tricky and having 1 is sometimes worse than having 2 because the one left out is invariably bored and restless.

Rhubabr I know - most activities seem to be 8 and under or 8 and over round these parts

Rhubarb

Ring up your local council and ask for either the Youth service or the Play and recreation department and ask what activities are going on for the kids in the summer.

A lot of authorites have loads of stuff going on and many parents miss out because they are not in the know about them.

Our have stuff like mountain biking, sailing, shelter building, hill walking and so on

will do, cheers.