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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that my friend is being uptight to dictate what snacks can be consumed in her house?

180 replies

firemansamantha · 14/06/2011 18:30

I have a group of friends, met through antenatal classes.

We've always met around each other's houses for a chat and catch up. The babies are all 9 months old now and been weaned a while.

Quite a few of the babies snack on raisins. This one friend has a dog(which she thanksfully locks in another room while we're there,. as I don#t want their dog around my DS).

Anyway, this one friend has a "no raisin" rule and basically refuses to let us give the DC raisins at her house. This is a right pain in the arse as DS loves them and they really get him out of bad/grumpy moods.

Friend says raisins aren't good for dogs but I just think it's rude for her to tell us what can and can't be eaten by 9 month old babies!

AIBU?

OP posts:
mouseanon · 14/06/2011 20:40

It wouldn't occur to me not to shut visiting children away from my dog the dog away from visiting children. He's a very tolerant animal but that doesn't make it ok for him to get mauled by over enthusiastic toddlers, and nor would I want my guests to feel uncomfortable. My children eat raisins and the dog occasionally gets hold of a box and chews it. No ill effects so far, 8 years and counting....

NormanTebbit · 14/06/2011 20:40

My kids like chocolate biscuits, cheese strings and breadsticks

DogsBestFriend · 14/06/2011 20:40

Passing swiftly over TSC's comment, musing that my kids aren't sad or troubled :o , what I don't "get" is why the OP continues to visit someone whose house rules she dislikes, whose dog she dislikes and doesn't appear to feel has a right to be there at all and whose very person the OP appears not to like much either.
Confused

Ormirian · 14/06/2011 20:44

OK. What if you wanted to give your child chocolate (I know, I know, what a suggestion!) and I had a new cream coloured carpet (wouldn't happen) would you feel outraged if I asked you to perhaps try....I don't know... raisins instead? To save my lovely new carpet?

Dogs are much much nicer than carpet.

Mamaz0n · 14/06/2011 20:44

I reckon OP is out spraying Dettol around the garden.

Funtimewincies · 14/06/2011 20:45

Aside from whether or not raisins are bad for dogs (I've no idea) please can we stop trotting out the 'raisins are worse than sweets' myth. The theory has been shown not to hold water example article

This drives a dentist friend nuts. Again, a little knowledge and suddenly everyone's the expert.

LadyBeagleEyes · 14/06/2011 20:48

So this is another doggist thread by stealth.
Can someone tell me if it's true that dogs are allergic to raisins.

tabulahrasa · 14/06/2011 20:48

You should think yourself lucky she lets you in her house at all, she shuts away her dog so that it doesn't upset anyone and asks perfectly reasonably to not feed your child one type of food, as it can be toxic to dogs and yet somehow you manage to construe that as her making the dog more important than babies.

If your child is so malnourished that it can't survive a coffee without raisins, I really think visiting someone us the least if your problems.

I'd not be inviting you to my house and I don't even gave a dog.

thisisyesterday · 14/06/2011 20:49

yes, yabu

her house, her rules (and it sounds like a sensible rule tbh!)

i am sure your son will survive a couple of hours without raisins won't he

what does he do at night???

Spuddybean · 14/06/2011 20:49

Are you suggesting that ALL desires of a child (or it's mother) should get priority over ANY need of a dog? Even if it is totally disproportionate, like he fancies a snack which may kill her dog?

Surely common sense would say he/you can survive a short while without a raisin.

It isn't a case of putting a dog above a child on something equal, but the consequences of this are different:

Best case scenario, a child has a raisin (but could happily eat something else) compared to the worst case scenario, a dog gets very ill and is in pain.

I can't imagine a time when a mate would say, 'oh by the way can you not bring raisins round as my dog may die' and i wouldn't say 'sure - no big deal'.

DogsBestFriend · 14/06/2011 20:49

Beagle, yes it's true. They can cause acute renal failure.

AgentZigzag · 14/06/2011 20:49

Grin at OP dettoling the garden.

TheMagnificentBathykolpian · 14/06/2011 20:51

someone linked to it up the thread, lady. Apparently as few as a dozen raisins can kill a small dog.

The hostess could crawl round the house looking for raisins, or hoover throughout after every visit, I suppose. But ffs, what a faff! Grin far easier to say no raisins. Nobody ever died from not eating raisins.

NormanTebbit · 14/06/2011 20:54

I have spent time scraping squashed raisins off my wooden floors. It is a PITA.

Blardy ell, it's no big deal, is it.

fearnelinen · 14/06/2011 20:54

How rude are you?!

Firstly, it's up to her whether she keeps a pet and unless her DCs have been mauled, you should keep your opinions to yourself.

Why on earth do you think it is your god given right to override her house rules?

You're going to love sending your precious bundle to school where all sorts of other people can impose rules and restrictions on your children.

DogsBestFriend · 14/06/2011 20:55

As an aside, people's view on what dogs can eat and who can allow them to do so bug me. i wouldn't offer your child sweets or nuts without asking but people seem to think a dog doesn't matter. One of my dogs is epileptic and foods with flavourings/colourings/preservatives can be a trigger but so very rarely does a fellow dog walker ASK me before they offer him a treat. The intention is kind but it could kill him.

Surely if it were a child and regardless of whether it's an offered treat or the risk of dropped ones which the DC could consume you'd ask the parent/carer before offering to the child and be respectful of, say, a request that you don't bring peanut snacks into the home of an allergic child? Or is it just me who thinks like this?

fearnelinen · 14/06/2011 20:56

Oh and thirdly, doncha? Really?

LolaRennt · 14/06/2011 20:59

your child can wont melt away if you dont feed him raisins for an hour....

Laska · 14/06/2011 21:02

Maybe she should think about her DC instead of having a dog around in the first place!!!

Gosh I wish you were my friend. You're just lovely.

LolaRennt · 14/06/2011 21:03

Actually rereading this I call troll.

Still terribly useful as I had no idea that raisins could kill a dog and I shall keep it in mind in the future so I don't mislay any raisins in front of someones chiuahua or something

TragicallyHip · 14/06/2011 21:11

Oh my fucking god!! You are complaining about not being able to bring raisins to snack on.

Have you heard yourself? Really have you??

LolaRennt · 14/06/2011 21:11

I'm being drawn in...must wub tiny puppy's fwuffy nose. must resist

thefirstMrsDeVere · 14/06/2011 21:14

I have a chihuahua. Not a teacup one because I wouldnt dream of creating a demand for dogs bred to small to function properly

But I have a cross bred one and have to be much more careful about toxic foods. Not that I was casually feeding poison to my previous, big dogs, but a lab can get away with a few raisins - a tinky chi cant.

You want to look at my vet's bill after my Atticus got acute pancreatitis, probably caused by a stray bit of easter egg?

Awomancalledhorse · 14/06/2011 21:14

Cannot believe the currant state of this thread! Grin

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