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to want to apologise to the travellers camping across the road?

190 replies

nethunsreject · 02/06/2011 06:53

I live in a quiet village. Half a dozen travellers set up camp across the road last week. They have been quiet, tidy and their kids well behaved. However, this hasn't stopped some of my neighbours complaining to the council about them and plans are now in place to move them on.

I am ashamed by this NIMBY-ism.

OP posts:
TakeItOnTheChins · 02/06/2011 15:25

Oh yes Worra - the "Look at me, all enlightened and tolerant - I love gyppo's, me" brigade call it prejudice.

Normal people call it learned cautiousness.

IprivateI · 02/06/2011 15:26

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worraliberty · 02/06/2011 15:27

What does that have to do with it?

My parents are both Irish Catholic. My Dad will be 80 next year and has had more than his fair share of prejudice.

However, he remains an un-smug level headed man who wouldn't dream of apologising on behalf of people just because he personally doesn't have a problem Hmm

MrsBethel · 02/06/2011 16:41

"Hammy02 Thu 02-Jun-11 15:22:23
I am starting to think Nethuns is a wind-up merchant."

I think you might be right:

2nd June, 6.53am - plans are in place to move them on, and wants to go and apologise

2nd June, 14.56pm - the site is clear and they've left no rubbish whatsoever

Cor, that was quick!

SusanneLinder · 02/06/2011 16:55

Hmm, did Hitler not have similar views to travellers and gypsies as some people on here?

I do love the stereotyping :). Yunno if we swapped the word "traveller" for "black" or "muslim" person, there would be more offences committed than you could shake a stick at.

But hey, lets bring 1970's prejudice bang up to date , but change the target. Angry

diabolo · 02/06/2011 16:59

Well I wish the ones who come and stay on the grass verge near the dump in my town were as polite and considerate as the ones you describe OP - rather than leaving human shit and all their rubbish over the side of the road and hanging their washing from the street light posts with a pack of nasty dogs for protection.

By all means offer them some space to camp in your garden if you feel you must do something.

diabolo · 02/06/2011 17:01

And I don't care what colour they are or what religion SusanneLinder - horrible people are horrible people, no matter where they come from or what they look like.

Some travellers are awful, some travellers are not.

worraliberty · 02/06/2011 17:10

It seems we've brought back the 1970's patronising "Look at me, I've got a gay/black/muslim friend...aren't I just wonderful" type of smugness that was just as false and irritating back then.

The fact is, even if they left the place immaculate and planted an apple tree before leaving...they're still not paying to stay there. They haven't paid for the local facilities everyone else has to.

The fact the OP doesn't give a shiny shite about this law breaking is entirely up to her..but to want to apologise on behalf of those who do, is just breathtakingly arrogant.

I don't give a shiny shite if for example people go shoplifting in Tesco...but I wouldn't feel the need to apologise to all shoplifters everywhere on behalf of those who do.

bubbles4 · 02/06/2011 18:03

I have no problem people moaning about the travellers who have stoped on their village green,caused damage and left a load of rubbish but take offence to people declaring that all travellers are criminals who avoid paying any taxes,it is not right to make sweeping generalisations about any race or culture and these generalisations have been made on this thread.

nethunsreject · 02/06/2011 19:43

It isn't a wind up, no. Hmm Trust me, i'd have come up with something more interesting than this!

as Sussanne says, it seems to be acceptable to be completely intolerant of travellers in a way that (thankfully) it isn't about other groups. This was a group of people doing no harm whatsoever, yet many of my neighbours were up in arms about them, going on about making sure things were locked, etc. The ONLY person with right to complain was the owner of the land.

As I said earlier, my 'apologising' was not going to be literal. Rather, I wanted to do something which would be anti-prejudice.

However, it seems that nowadays to do so (or even to think about it) is thought ridiculous. Nice.

OP posts:
fedupofnamechanging · 02/06/2011 20:01

nethun it makes you look a bit like a 'do gooder', which does irritate people. Fact of the matter is a lot of people have had problems with some travellers stealing and leaving the places where they camp in a complete shit hole when they move on. Added to the fact that many do not contribute financially to society, yet feel entitled to the benefits of the said society that they choose to live outside of, pisses people off. Now it is wrong to think that just because a lot of travellers are like this, that all are, but tbh you apologising for other peoples legitimate opinions is annoying. You are only responsible for what you do and you can't go apologising because other people have different views based on their own legitimate experiences.

nethunsreject · 02/06/2011 20:05

Fair enough karma.

Didn't mean it to come across that way.

I am really just pissed off with the acceptance of this particular prejudice. Guess I need to articulate it in a more succinct way.

AIBU prob not the place!

OP posts:
bluebobbin · 02/06/2011 20:12

I don't really understand.

If the council moved them on, then they had no right/were breaking some sort of rule in being on that particular piece of land. So what's the problem? Councils fine people for putting wheelie bins out on the wrong day etc - nobody is allowed to break the council's rules so why should travellers be able to?

fedupofnamechanging · 02/06/2011 20:17

Probably not Smile.

I grew up with a girl from a travelling family who had settled in the same street as my mum and dad.She was as close to me as my own sister. She and her mum were the lovliest, kindest people you could meet. Otoh, her father left a lot to be desired. I think most people here are not saying that all travellers are bad, only that their own experiences have not left them with a great impression. I think most people would acknowledge that humans are a mixed bunch when it comes to being nice/not nice.

worraliberty · 03/06/2011 00:01

Karma your post at 20:01:17 was exactly what I was trying to say.

It's not about prejudice, it's about being irritated by 'do gooders' who have had no bad experiences, so tend to ride rough shod over the opinions of those who have.

For example, if these people were moved on...that means the land owner certainly did not give them permission to simply turn up and start living on his/her private property. It's not fair and I imagine, quite distressing.

Therefore, the attitudes of do gooders kind of rubs salt in the wounds...and for what? So everyone can say what a wonderfully tolerant, welcoming person they are?

Well that would be fine OP if it was Your property they decided to invade...but it wasn't was it?

worraliberty · 03/06/2011 00:02

Sorry..that should read 'ride rough shod over the feelings/distress caused by those who have'

beesimo · 03/06/2011 19:27

Thanks for this thread OP you are decent and fair, the rest of you may in large be a pack of gammy hoors melts but the thread has proved very useful to me as I can read it with my DCs. When I say be careful when your not local, I tell my DDs especially 'move quickly don't make eye contact make yourself invisible' and they laugh.

'Oh Mam its not like when GranGran was alive yous behind the times'

Well they can read this and see 'nice middle class ladies' are far far more dangerous than any BNP scum

Thankee Beesimo

bubblecoral · 03/06/2011 19:33

I tell my DDs especially 'move quickly don't make eye contact make yourself invisible'

And then you would wonder why people have a bad opinion of them! How do you expect people to treat your dd's if you actively teach them to act differently?

Why would them smiling and making eye contact with a 'local' be a bad thing?

beesimo · 03/06/2011 19:49

When they are local to us they are as free a birds.

When they are somewhere their not know 'smiling and making eye contact' and say a purse goes missing from a shop???

Or a 'white' man tries to hurt one of the and it is my DD who made eye contact and smiled.

I am glad I come on this MN because nothing has change you can cover a cesspool of hate with a silver lid but lift the lid and the cesspool is still there.

bubblecoral · 03/06/2011 20:19

But anyone that is friendly would smile and make eye contact. Why would your dd's get the blame for something like that any more than anyone else that smiled and made eye contact? Especially somewhere that they aren't known. If they're not known as being travellers, then there can't be predudice. I genuinely don't understand. It's not like they have a tattoo on their forehead saying that they come from a travelling family.

TakeItOnTheChins · 04/06/2011 11:09

I take it you're a "traveller" Beesimo?

ccpccp · 04/06/2011 13:58

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beesimo · 04/06/2011 16:47

I didn't say they were BNP scum I said they were more dangerous than any BNP scum and I stand by my words as they have no choice but to stand by theirs. Because 'by your own words you will be exposed'

I am of Romany Heritage so not what you would call Traveller. We have been settled for 3 generations, nobody in my extended family has ever claimed the dole or child benefit we go to private doctors and dentists. I would say more to ya but frankly the less you know about us the better for us.

Wallow in you ignorance like pigs wallowing in the mud its all your good for.

diabolo · 04/06/2011 17:17

beesimo - surely if someone came and camped illegally on land near you, made a god-awful mess and caused trouble, you would feel a bit put-out to say the least?

I don't think anyone on here is saying that travellers are all bad, but some of them are - and they are the one's people remember unfortunately.

beesimo · 04/06/2011 17:37

People like you are 'less than' you need your scapegoats and hate figures because you lack something you have a sad dark empty bitterness within you. End of.

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