to be completely shocked by what the MW did today and make a complaint?

[Bogeyface]

So she comes round and does the sweep and then takes her gloves off and goes into the kitchen to, I assume, put them in the bin.

She said "oh I cant see your bin so I'll just leave them here..."

Here, as I discovered after she left, was the top shelf/basket of my dishwasher that i was halfway through loading when she arrived. No, I am not joking, yes, she really did leave gloves that had been inside my vagina IN my dishwasher.

AIBU to make a complaint about her through PALS? Especially as this comes on the back of several other issues including her not returning urgent calls, not turning up for appointments and getting my notes wrong.

I have a friend who is a local HV and she says that this particular MW is v unpopular amongst them too and they want someone to make a complaint as otherwise nothing will change.

Have the read the first, but personally I think all this criticism about the gloves in the dishwasher is out of order. I do think that was disgusting and I wouldn't have liked it. I wouldn't go to PALs though I would probably just raise it quietly with the team leader midwife along with my other concerns.

To your friend who is a local health professional, I think I'd just say "thanks for unsettling me at this difficult, if you have concerns about her why don't you and your colleagues raise it with management as behoves professionals"

But I'm not the expert, when I had my first 16 years ago I though M/W and HVs were the most incompetent and rudest creaturs I had ever come across with one or two exceptions.

I did wonder if anyone would mention PFB.

ITs actually my PSB, that is, precious SIXTH born, so sorry to disappoint on that score!

I still think its disgusting but I wont make a big song and dance over it but I do feel that the other issues need bringing to someones attention. I will write to the supervisor of midwives rather than going through PALS, and hopefully that will be enough to get the MW a gentle reminder about the other stuff.

Thanks :)

Well in that case one would have assumed you have a little experience with your vagina and not see it as a cesspit full of bacteria and virii.

I think Onceamai has a good point, though, with this:

"To your friend who is a local health professional, I think I'd just say "thanks for unsettling me at this difficult, if you have concerns about her why don't you and your colleagues raise it with management as behoves professionals"" because really, the last thing a heavily pregnant woman needs to be told is that her midwife is so unprofessional that her colleagues are desperate to get rid of her. I know she's your friend, but either there's enough for others to complain about, or she should stay quiet.

Which is not to say that you shouldn't complain if you feel inclined to, just that your friend's being a bit unprofessional herself.

Just be careful where you put the baby when it comes out...

If you are that uncomfortable with your own body, it doesnt bode well for you having a good birth experience. Your vagina is your friend, learn to love her!

Eh?

Is your vagina toxic ?

I really hate to lower the tone but I can't believe no-one has mentioned the fact your DH must go near your vagina pretty regularly with tongue, fingers and willy and I am hoping he doesn't find it "disgusting". What do you think was clinging on to those gloves that would contaminate anything in a dishwasher beyond all repair?

What I don't understand is why you put gloves in a dw anyway? Surely the'd get swept off and stuck in the spinny things? And mine has a ferocious heating element which melts anything that touches it. Carnage!

I don't quite understand why she'd put them in the dishwasher - but I certainly don't think it's 'disgusting'. Why would it be? Your vagina isn't dirty - in fact it's probably one of the cleanest, least 'germy' parts of your body. certainly much cleaner than, say, your mouth or hands (and you put things that have touched your mouth and hands in the dishwasher?).

It WAS unprofessional but not so gross as you are imagining OP. She ought to have found the bin. But yout crocks wont melt for havng a bit of fanjo germ on them.

I hpe the sweep was ok.

As a health care professional I'm aware that when you take gloves off they are usually inside out so it's likely that the bit that was in contact with the dishwasher had been next to her hands rather than your vagina (which incidentally is probably more of a concern re. bacteria etc.). I'm surprised that she didn't just ask where the bin is - I wouldn't personally leave used gloves anywhere in a patient's home. If you had protein in your urine I'm not sure why she wouldn't document that - it's usual to document what the result was not put NAD if it wasn't.

I think your friend is being deeply unprofessional talking to you about this midwife and how unpopular she is. I do wonder if this has coloured your opinion of her? If they have concerns about her practice then they should be addressing this not hoping a patient will do it; the Panorama programme last night has made people ask why staff don't report issues of concern and here we have another example of health care professionals being unhappy with a colleague but doing nothing about it.

Good luck with the new baby.

Gloves in the dishwasher is weird, I think that is vile.

Not sure about making a formal complaint though. Sounds like your friend is hoping that you will land the midwife in it.

YABU and a leeeeeetle precious

Very odd that she put them in the dishwasher, wouldn't they have blocked it if it had been turned on?

I wonder if she had opened all the cupboards looking for the bin and left them there without thinking?

I can't imagine anyone deliberately leaving hospital gloves in the dishwasher.

I think I'd have raised an eyebrow, thought oh well it's my own fanny & chucked em away.

Your friend the hv is being more unprofessional than your mw.

Discussing a colleague, as she has with you, breaches confidentiality and is a sackable offence.

The oddest thing about this thread is how disgusted you are by your own body. I find that really sad.
Are you having a vaginal birth or is that " icky" and are you one of those women who doesn't breastfeed because it's " yucky"?

Because you sound like it.

I love my nonny, but I wouldn't love used nonny-gloves in my dishwasher. YANBU. To leave medical waste somewhere like that is weird and odd and weird. And a little bit odd.
Good luck with the sweep!

Your friend needs to be careful as she's risking disciplinary for slagging off another colleague like this. I wouldnt trust someone who does this at all. It sounds like you've been heavily influenced by her in a bad way.

Gotta love MN!

From me asking if AIBU to find medical waste left in my dishwasher utterly revolting (and I still do, U or not!) I am accused of being precious, questioned about whether I am having a vaginal birth (yes, it will be my 6th) breastfeeding (no, thanks to surgery I cant but would love to) and am apparantly disgusted by my own body!

I have posted further up about what I will be doing about the whole MW issue and I wont be speaking to my friend about it again, if she has issues then yes, she should deal with them and I wont get involved, but will just do what I feel is right based on my own experiences.

Rainbow, I had already got issues with this MW, and asked my friends opinion. I have not been influenced by her at all.

Greenstockings remarks are uncalled for IMO. Ops had/gonna have 6 kids! She can't be that grossed out by her body to do that 6 times (are you mad? ) I'd find it a bit manky for used gloves to be left lying about , not that hard to find a bin is it?