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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be completely shocked by what the MW did today and make a complaint?

194 replies

Bogeyface · 31/05/2011 23:19

So she comes round and does the sweep and then takes her gloves off and goes into the kitchen to, I assume, put them in the bin.

She said "oh I cant see your bin so I'll just leave them here..."

Here, as I discovered after she left, was the top shelf/basket of my dishwasher that i was halfway through loading when she arrived. No, I am not joking, yes, she really did leave gloves that had been inside my vagina IN my dishwasher.

AIBU to make a complaint about her through PALS? Especially as this comes on the back of several other issues including her not returning urgent calls, not turning up for appointments and getting my notes wrong.

I have a friend who is a local HV and she says that this particular MW is v unpopular amongst them too and they want someone to make a complaint as otherwise nothing will change.

OP posts:
Original poster
Bogeyface · 31/05/2011 23:32

I should also add that when I read about someone putting their mooncup in the dishwasher, that made me want to heave too! So maybe I am too sensitive about such things!

OP posts:
fearnelinen · 31/05/2011 23:32

Yes Bogey you should definately complain about her not turning up to appts and missing calls. That's not on.
I'm not telling you what I do with my mooncup Grin

TragicallyHip · 31/05/2011 23:32

She put them in the dishwasher? Confused

Don't think it warrants a complaint so I think you are over reacting. But obviously there are other issues with her so if they need complaining about then do so. This alone does not.

BooyHoo · 31/05/2011 23:33

ok, your vagina is cleaner than your mouth and you dont think twice about putting forks in the dishwasher.

Original poster
Bogeyface · 31/05/2011 23:33

Lockets No, I happened to see her (she is a friend and not MY HV, probably didnt make that clear) and said "is this odd or is it me?" and she said that she should have taken them away with her, or atleast asked me the best place to put them.

OP posts:
celadon · 31/05/2011 23:33

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lockets · 31/05/2011 23:34

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worraliberty · 31/05/2011 23:34

not returning urgent calls, not turning up for appointments and getting my notes wrong

Now that is another thing entirely. Most NHS staff are rushed off their feet and a complaint might actually help to get more staff where they're needed.

But then again, you would surely have complained by now if you were going to? The dishwasher thing and what the HV said is just petty imo.

MadamDeathstare · 31/05/2011 23:34

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ColonelBrandonsBiggestGroupie · 31/05/2011 23:36

YABU and your friend has clearly got it in for her and was unprofessional to tell you that she is unpopular. This will seem like a v v small deal once the baby comes, believe me.

MadamDeathstare · 31/05/2011 23:36

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MadamDeathstare · 31/05/2011 23:37

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Original poster
Bogeyface · 31/05/2011 23:38

Worra I would have done had she been like this earlier, but its only in the last 6 weeks or so that i have really seen her regularly and realised what she is like, and with no transport to go to other clinics it was difficult to arrange a different midwife.

I guess "Complaint" is a bit strong. Possibly more of a "I feel I should bring these issues to your attention" iykwim.

OP posts:
fearnelinen · 31/05/2011 23:38

It's not on, but it's not shocking is it? I mean, there are worse things.
I would have been furious it they'd have been on the worktop.

lockets · 31/05/2011 23:39

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Original poster
Bogeyface · 31/05/2011 23:40

What I want to know is....WHAT do you produce from there Lockets?!

OP posts:
fearnelinen · 31/05/2011 23:40

Yes, bring the issues up. But I promise you, little mini bogey is going to be soooo beautiful (even covered in fanny juice (sorry)!) you won't care what is brought to her attention.

fearnelinen · 31/05/2011 23:42

Lockets pops out throat sweets from the living room and expertly lands them in the cutlery basket. Her DH loves it Grin

celadon · 31/05/2011 23:42

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Original poster
Bogeyface · 31/05/2011 23:43

Blimey, that makes the woman with the pingpong balls looks positively amateur! :o

OP posts:
Checkmate · 31/05/2011 23:44

Threads like this are what I love about mumsnet! Am also about to give birth, and have just laughed until I wet myself. Poor DH thought my waters had broken....

My mw was here today, and I think I'd have noted it if she left her gloves on my dishwasher rack, and teased her for it the next time I saw her.

Complain about the other stuff, but please not about the dishwasher thing unless you want to look like a loon.

lockets · 31/05/2011 23:44

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Original poster
Bogeyface · 31/05/2011 23:45

OK, so I wont mention the dishwasher in the letter, but might mention that she didnt take her used equipment away with her as she should have done.

Is that ok?

I suppose I am just uber sensitive to her because of the other problems, I cant say for sure that it would have bothered me that much if she had been great every other way.

OP posts:
worraliberty · 31/05/2011 23:46

I would leave it until after you've given birth and then think about it again.

For all you know, this could be the woman who ends up delivering your baby...and she could turn out to be fan-fucking-tastic. You just don't know.

I hated one of my midwives all through my pregnancy. I was dreading the old bulldog being on a shift when I went into labour...and yep I got her!

But by the time I was holding my son, I was so impressed with her and the way she helped me cope...I could have kissed her! (Actually she kissed me as she left) Blush

celadon · 31/05/2011 23:47

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