to think that DD is promiscuous and unreasonable?

[dangerousdebbie1]

DD, been going out with boyfriend for six weeks. She only turned 17 nine days ago. DD met her boyfriend at a guiding / scouting convention and they hit it off. Unfortunately, he lives 81 miles away in Nottingham. Anyway, just had a blazing row with DH and DD as DD announces that boyfriend is coming to visit next weekend and when I asked her where she thought he would sleep, she looked at me with aghast, and said in my bed of course.

Rightly or wrongly, I said over my dead body. I told DD in no uncertain terms that this was our home and not a brothel. DH says i'm out of order and reminded me that this is 2011 and not 1951.

I have been in tears over this. Sorry, but it wouldn't matter if she was 17 or 21, she isn't married so I will not let her share a bed in my house. Am confused.

Yup.

Telling your child that you don't want them sharing a bed in your house until they're married = fine.

Calling your child promiscuous and spouting crap about brothels = fruitloop/troll.

It was to blatant - if your going to go fishing

I lost my virginity at 14, am married, became a mother at 28 and have never been on benefits (other than SMP). Why on earth should your daughter end up as a single mother on benefits because she has sex at 17? And is now the time to break it to you that there isn't actually anything wrong with that anyway?

Nice to see such Christian attitudes of love and forgiveness paraded by the OP and her supporters.

"what a waste of a Maths degree to go into teaching."

I'll be sure to tell her to change her choice of career based on some random person on the internet

What's wrong with name changing? FFS mumsnet isn't an exclusive club and we all have to conform to set rules (who are these Sardis that check every OP to see if they're new???). Some people have draconian traditional views about sex. Doesn't make them a hairy trucker.

my dd has expressed interest in teaching

I would be very proud of her if she did

Georgimama

Whats with the aggression?

Sardis?!!! saddos.

Bloody auto correct.

DangerousDebbie - You poor thing! I feel really sorry for you. I agree that you shouldn't have used the word 'brothel' - but don't blame you for it at all, as you were obviously upset.

What I don't understand is why your DD said he'd be sharing her bed 'of course'. Why did she think that would be acceptable to you?

I'm no prude but I wouldn't allow my DD to sleep with a boy she'd only known for a matter of weeks, under my roof - but then my DD would know that.

I also don't understand how you and your DH can hold such differing views on this.

Anyway, all that aside, I totally agree with you, so no, YANBU, Absolutely not.

I can`t help noticing that some of the posters on here would seem be more at home in the audience of the Jeremy Kyle show, in fact possibly the people on the stage. Please can we at least attempt to have a semi-literate topic of conversation.

My parents let me share a bed with my boyfriend at 16 (long before I lost my virginity to him in fact, but I did that too).

Guess what - 15 years later we are still together, and are now married with two children. Hope I have my parents' wisdom and courage when it comes to my own kids.

I think some of you have the moral fibre of weetabix.

I'm shocked and saddened.

The disturbing thing is that the blatent troll threads bring out some real nutty opinions. The trip-trappers must be pissing their pants with glee.

Fabby, if it weren't for Maths teachers, your PFB wouldn't be where he is now.

Teaching is a vocation, but a maths degree is one of the hardest to get, and you can earn so much money in banking and insurance with such a degree.

Seems such a waste. It's just an opinion - sorry!

I am a Christian and I wouldn't want your language round my daughter.

Well, as I said, my Mum wouldnt let me sleep with my bf in the house. And 15 years later I ended up a single mum on benefits. So, your theory fails on me?

TBH I'd rather be a single mum on benefits than a mum who calls her own DD promiscuous and a prostitute. Perhaps if you spent a little less time looking down your nose at people, and more time building a relationship with your DD you'd find her more likely to talk to you.

tethersend-

Well said, I couldn't agree more. Don't listen to anyone else, you are RIGHT.

How am I being aggressive? My opinion has been expressed in much milder terms than many others.

It's not all about the money - or no one would be a teacher.

We are massively proud of DD, she is already tutoring adult learners at Uni for numeracy and literacy , she actually wants to work with young offenders and adults with learning difficulties.

iggly - there's nothing wrong with namechanging.

But a lot of namechangers posting very extreme inflammatory views is a fairly unlikely coincidence.

And no, I didn't check anyone's posting history. They both SAID they were first time posters/name changers.

tethersend, are you talking to yourself? Did you forget to name change?

weetabix sticks like cement - so is that comment a compliment or not?