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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to ask her to take someone else?

213 replies

sofaqueenie · 16/05/2011 14:28

I bought my best friend and I two Take That tickets for 30th June, which we've been really looking forward to.

I've recently discovered that I'm pregnant and it works out I'll be around 13 weeks when we go.

TBH - I really don't want to go now for that reason and a few others. I don't know how to tell her that I don't want to go, but that she's more than welcome to take someone else.

She's been looking forward to it so much with me, and she's confided in me that I'm her only real friend that she likes spending time with, so it makes it a little worse. She knows I'm pregnant, and she's already started to panic about how she's 'going to have to make sure I'm OK' and I just can't be doing with it!

Any advice?

OP posts:
TheVisitor · 17/05/2011 11:46

Sockshitter

NEWSFLASH

No shit, Sherlock!

BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack · 17/05/2011 13:33

When I was newly pg with my DS I couldnt stand for long periods of time without feeling sick and dizzy, no way would I have been able to or wanted to attend a concert where I couldnt sit down.

Just tell her truthfully, if she is a good friend she will understand!

StayFr0sty · 17/05/2011 13:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HubbaHubbaBubba · 17/05/2011 14:10

It's not a question of having common sense though OP - the reasons you've mentioned are all to do with being pregnant (and you suggested there were other reasons), although IME standing for an hour or so isn't going to do you or baby any damage, especially when that is amongst -ahem- heavy rockers Hmm :o like those who will be at the Take That concert!!

Your 2nd post is a bit OTT.

Could you ask your friend to contribute to her part of the ticket?

TidyDancer · 17/05/2011 18:24

That's exactly it Fr0sty, the OP seems to have only posted because she wanted people to tell her she was right, she didn't really want opinions, just validation for her wanting to get out of a commitment. Seems to happen so often in AIBU!

Original poster
sofaqueenie · 17/05/2011 18:30

Yep - you're are so right Tidy. I need to seek other people's approval before I do anything.

I really am soooooo feeble.

OP posts:
BitOfFun · 17/05/2011 18:36

That reminds me- I need to go to the chippy.

StayFr0sty · 17/05/2011 18:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar · 17/05/2011 19:01

Don't be daft, Op. And like I said earlier, all you've had on this thread is some gentle ribbing and mild get-a-grippery - which was before you explained about the miscarriages.

This friend though - is she a bit needy? And if she is, do you like her all the same?

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar · 17/05/2011 19:05

Forget peas BoF; get a savaloy, a pickled egg and some scrumps.

cricketballs · 17/05/2011 19:07

and gravy....

BitOfFun · 17/05/2011 19:10

Curry sauce?

Original poster
sofaqueenie · 17/05/2011 20:05

Jenai - I really do love my friend and she is a little bit needy. I'm honestly looking forward to it, although it abviously didn't come across like it in my OP. I was trying to do what was best for both of us, and I now realise that going is a good idea and everything will be OK.

I'm sorry if I went off on a major one yesterday, I know it isn't an excuse, but I only found out I was pregnant on Saturday and it's knocked me sideways a little that's all.

OP posts:
TidyDancer · 17/05/2011 20:42

I'm not saying you're feeble, but it seems likely what you wanted was for people to agree with you, rather than persuade you otherwise. Which is fine btw, but don't ask if you are being unreasonable if you are not able to accept that some people think you are being unreasonable. From the reaction you had, it seemed like the minute you heard an opinion you didn't like, you were off on one.

I am really sorry for what you've been through, and it makes complete sense that you're overcautious because of that, but people have been trying to make you understand that it's okay to go and that it's safe and you'll have a great time. If you scroll up to one of my previous posts on here, you will see I gave a small bit of info about Wembley Stadium (that there is an unreserved seating section). You don't even have to get there early to get into it IME. I went to Foo Fighters there a couple of years ago, and I was in the standing area right up until the bands came on. I just changed my mind, wanted to sit down and have a drink and went and sat in the stands. They weren't packed and it was fine.

Try not to worry, and I hope you have a good time.

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar · 17/05/2011 20:49

:)

Oh good. With the usual caveat of checking with your mw/ob then go. And have a fabulous time!

3boys5pets · 17/05/2011 21:58

Sofa - just thought I'd let you know in case you don't realise - wherever you're seeing TT, if you have standing tickets they also cover the unreserved seats which is basically the whole lower tier all round whichever stadium. If you are planning to go then I'd say going for those seats would be your best bet by far. I've sat in them for TT before & the view is fab! And another tip - if you don't think you're going to be able to stand for the entire concert, then go for the front row in that tier as everyone will stand up as soon as there's the slightest sign of movement on that stage! So if you're in the front row you won't have someone stood up in front of you, requiring you to stand up in order to see anything! (As these seats are unreserved, the earlier you get to the venue the better pick of the seats you get). After all this I hope you enjoy it & all the best for your pregnancy.

CurrySpice · 17/05/2011 21:59

Oh that's good sofa. I hope you have a lovely time :)

And congratulations on the pregnancy too :o

I want chips now Angry

CurrySpice · 17/05/2011 22:02

And if you can't get an unreserved seat, could you take a camping chair or something so that you can sit down while you're waiting and only have to stand while they're actually on?

I hate standing and I'm not even pregnant. Just bone idle Blush

QuintessentialOldMoo · 17/05/2011 22:34

Kudos to you OP, for coming back with a more reasonable frame of mind.

Respect.

BluddyMoFo · 17/05/2011 22:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Fecklessdizzy · 17/05/2011 22:51

Snag one of those spare seats and have a great time, OP. Didn't mean to take the piss earlier, everyone's different ...

First time I was all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed and enjoyed terrifying grown men with my ginormo-bump, but cut to the second time and I was an up-chucking weepy wreck and so knackered I used to fall asleep in the middle of phone conversations ( my sister's never let me forget it, mind you she does go on a bit ... ) and no power on earth would have got me out of the house after tea-time.

I lost one too, I know how paranoid it makes you the next time around.

Do whatever you feel comfortable with!

ClipArt · 17/05/2011 22:54

YANBU. Not everyone feels robust enough for concerts when pregnant. It's entirely up to you, OP, and if you did decide not to go, your friend would find out the reason soon enough.

BadRoly · 17/05/2011 22:54

I saw Robbie 11 days before dd1 was born. It nearly killed me tbh - our seats were about 3 rows from the very highest point of the Millenium Stadium in Cardiff. That is a lot of steps. I have since always made sure neer to buy concert tickets in the top tier...

BitOfFun · 17/05/2011 23:17

I'm glad you came back- and congratulations on your pregnancy Smile. FWIW, I didn't go to the chippy in the end. I had a boiled egg with asparagus

CurrySpice · 17/05/2011 23:26

Bad choice BoF. Only IMHO of course Wink

I really want chips now

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