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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think that I am doomed to a life of singledom forever?

437 replies

DameShirleyKnot · 06/05/2011 10:42

I have been thinking recently about maybe getting a new boyfriend at some point in the future.

As the only men I ever meet are wankers, I don't know why I crossed that out actually, yes, most of the men I meet are wankers, I have decided to start having a little look on Guardian Soulmates to get an idea of what is out there.

Basically, what is out there is men like:

"Crazy Creator
Intuitive, playful, spontaneous, celebratory, he makes things - sometimes for 'the world of culture' but many times for you, songs, poems, cards, perfumes, he will get the tube carriage to sing happy birthday to you, hold a gigantic airport placard with your name on or when you are ill he will dress as a doctor...he will jump without thinking!!!!."

This. This man talks about himself in the 3rd person and is a dickhead.

Can anyone find me someone who is NOT a pretentious arse please?

OP posts:
GettingaWarmGrip · 07/05/2011 13:11

How old are you Archie?

How does 'not tolerating nagging' manifest itself?

What about previous relationships? What sort of person are you looking for?

GettingaWarmGrip · 07/05/2011 13:12

X posts...so do I Boris! For reasons too numerous to list!

VinegarTits · 07/05/2011 13:21

i would never date anyone who told me his IQ

valiumbandwitch · 07/05/2011 13:25

Things that might put a woman off Archie are "depressed", "moody" and "won't tolerate nagging". That's just another way of saying that a partner is not allowed to challenge him.

It depends though. Does this person or any person 'who doesn't tolerate nagging' make any attempt to reach compromise in a relationship, or is it a 'my way or the high way' kind of attitude.

valiumbandwitch · 07/05/2011 13:29

oh right, only depressed after watching Eastenders.

I would like to be able to give such a full account of myself on a dating website and think that somebody somewhere would read it and think, yeah, she sounds like the kind of person i'm compatable with.

Imagine if a woman put in to her blurb that she wouldn't tolerate being ignored! would that sound as 'alarm-bell' ish?

VinegarTits · 07/05/2011 13:31

i like Eastenders

archieleach · 07/05/2011 13:47

GettingaWarmGrip
How old are you Archie? - 40 also slim, quite good looking, have own asparagus bed ;)
How does 'not tolerating nagging' manifest itself? Well it very rarely if ever happens tbh, it just makes me a bit unhappy when it does as my mother was neurotic and one can't help memories.
What about previous relationships? - Is that relevant?
What sort of person are you looking for? I'm not. I'm very happily married thank you.
VinegarTits
i would never date anyone who told me his IQ.

A very good point. I only put it in as it seems to explain my low threshold for boredom. Left to my own devices I am never bored but for example, when you are waiting hours for customers and cannot do anything else constructive in the meantime, I find it difficult. Or perhaps I can only tolerate self obsessed people for a few minutes and then make my excuses. Putting in IQ is very naff - agreed.

valiumbandwitch -

Things that might put a woman off Archie are "depressed", "moody" and "won't tolerate nagging". That's just another way of saying that a partner is not allowed to challenge him.

Did I put depressed? my mistake. I am never depressed. I was many years ago but went through it and came out the other side.

Oh I see what you mean. I think there is a world of difference between feeling a bit down/pissed off by the antics on Eastenders and being depressed - kettle of fish.

I can be moody, it doesn't mean I am that often, it is just a negative. Wouldn't you be a bit suspicious of a person who can't see their negative points?

VinegarTits · 07/05/2011 13:50

if you are happily married why did you ask if the OP would date you Confused

TiggyD · 07/05/2011 13:58

Archie said:"...I don't like dirt and mess...don't take shit from people...can get bored quickly by people...High sex drive...can be moody, will not tolerate nagging, can be opinionated..."

I'm in love! Grin

archieleach · 07/05/2011 14:00

Funny thread, all these weird characters looking for people online. It seems quite obvious why they need to do it.
What about women? do they write such things? or just fluffy anodyne stuff?

valiumbandwitch
Imagine if a woman put in to her blurb that she wouldn't tolerate being ignored! would that sound as 'alarm-bell' ish?

I see your point. Do you see them as equivalents across the gender divide?
I suppose as always it depends on definitions. If nagging means continually asking someone to do something they should know to do without being asked, then I guess they are equivalents.

If however it is continually asking someone to do something you know they really don't like to do (hmm like going dancing for example) and not just accepting that people have different likes/dislikes, or asking someone to do something when you know they have a lot less time than you but because it is "their" job or because someone has a sudden desire to create a lot of silly little rules for domestic bliss and thinks everyone else in the household should do as they say without discussion (like, "on Wednesdays when the empty milk bottles are collected, they must be washed and dried and put into their container on the doorstep, to the left of the dustbin, not the right, but only if it isn't raining, if it is they must be put under the eaves")

archieleach · 07/05/2011 14:01

VinegarTits Sat 07-May-11 13:50:50
if you are happily married why did you ask if the OP would date you

I assume she is not serious.

VinegarTits · 07/05/2011 14:10

nah im still Confused

maybe im thick because i watch eastenders

archieleach · 07/05/2011 14:11

TiggyD Sat 07-May-11 13:58:39
Archie said:"...I don't like dirt and mess...don't take shit from people...can get bored quickly by people...High sex drive...can be moody, will not tolerate nagging, can be opinionated..."

I'm in love!

Sorry, I think it is better to be honest, don't you?
Are your edited highlights negatives or positives?
Must be negatives I suppose.

Are you or your partner someone who lives in a dirty, stinking pig sty, who lets people walk all over them because they cannot be assertive, spending all their time with people they don't really like or get stimulated by thus giving them false messages, who only has sex a couple of times a year and is continually bouncing around and loves being treated like a doormat and has never had an original thought and couldn't back it up if they did?

Hmm, some people find it too easy to be negative perhaps?

VinegarTits · 07/05/2011 14:14

anyway girls, i have registered with muddy matches, might bag myself a nice farmer

DollyTwat · 07/05/2011 14:24

Ii was on plenty of fish till they matched me with my ex. That was a shock then I realised that he would see I'd been looking at his profile so had to delete all traces of me
Might take another look at Sarah beeney's site
Thing is there's no point paying unless there's a few nice

DollyTwat · 07/05/2011 14:26

Farking iPhone!

...nice ones to email

TheFlyingOnion · 07/05/2011 14:26

If you are meeting anyone from the Shropshire area, let me know - I think I've dated most of them Grin

Seriously, I had to give up on mm when I went on a date with a guy who knew one of my previous dates.

Its a verrrry small pond....

TheFlyingOnion · 07/05/2011 14:30

I'm inspired by this thread to try match.com - I'm outside of the UK and I think they have a local site.

Any inspirational nickname ideas? Fun, flirty, not too tragic?? Blush

SarahStratton · 07/05/2011 14:37

Funny thread all these weird characters looking for people online

Fecking cheek. I am not a weird character Angry

I am.. unique.

SarahStratton · 07/05/2011 14:42

OK tell us more archie. Sell yourself.

What do you do with your 160 IQ? What business are you in/entrepreneurial achievements? Whereabouts in Europe have you been/lived? What's your favourite meal to cook?

TheFlyingOnion · 07/05/2011 14:44

My IQ must be in the basement, I can while away ages doing absolutely nothing....

SarahStratton · 07/05/2011 14:46

Me too Grin

Fancy dinner some time?

VinegarTits · 07/05/2011 14:52

hows does one know thats ones IQ is 160 anyway? did you take the facebook IQ test? Grin

SarahStratton · 07/05/2011 14:58

Oh that. I took that and mine was over 200 Grin

TheFlyingOnion · 07/05/2011 15:00

I would Smile

I thought IQs were a Victorian invention to try to prove that boys was cleverererer than girls?