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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I’m skint and think this is a good way to pay off some debts – AIBU?

592 replies

WhereTheresAWill · 09/02/2011 16:53

I?m a single parent and although I have a day job it?s minimum wage, so like most people money is tight. I have debts to pay off and anything extra is very much needed so I can get back on an even keel. I started doing webcam work a few months ago after a suggestion from a friend who?s in a similar industry (she?s an escort), and it?s helping me to pay off my debts and give me a bit of extra cash to treat my DC. I can?t do a second job outside the house as I have no evening childcare for my DC, so in that respect it?s ideal. At present I only work on the cams for approx. 3 hours on Friday and Saturday nights when DCs in bed and although there are some time wasters on the site I work from, most of the blokes are fine (with some interesting requests!) and I have a few regulars, one of which spends approx £40-50 a time when he has a show with me.

I know the moral majority won?t approve and will say that I?m being exploited, used, abused etc. but they are the ones paying a lot of money to see me put on a show, so surely it's the other way around! I just dress up, watch TV until a show is requested then do a bit of a dance and a strip tease and watch the money to stack up as the minutes pass - so who?s the fool?! I?m not a victim, as I choose to do this and actually enjoy the fact that these men are paying me to put on a show for them. They can?t touch me, have no idea where I live or even what my real name is, so it?s safe from that point of view, and if I don?t like them for any reason I can kick them out of my ?room?. Obviously I?ve only been doing it a few months and the novelty may wear off, but if things go well, my friend has suggested I could branch out into the odd bit of escorting as well to up my income a bit more.

AIBU doing this to make a bit of much-needed extra cash?

OP posts:
LDNmummy · 10/02/2011 22:55

Yes, agree to disagree sounds like a good idea reluctant

LDNmummy · 10/02/2011 22:56

Anyway, have to turn in myself. Goodnight, look forward to checking back tomorrow!

AnyFucker · 10/02/2011 22:57

I have copied it once, LDN, not again

FunnysInTheGarden · 10/02/2011 23:00

Oh yes dittany, but don't forget that most prostitutes go into it with their eyes wide open and of their own free will. They are simply the epitome of capitalism. They have it, someone else wants it, they name their price. Ahhh it's so refreshing to find women in such a strong position in our society, esp with regards to their own sexuality.............

ObnoxiousFucker · 10/02/2011 23:05

No they don't, what a fucking stupid thing to say.

Most prostitutes go into it because they need the money, either to look after their children, or to keep up their drug habit.

Either reason is scary, and not what any sane person would want for their daughter, or son for that matter.

And if anyone thinks that women prostituting themselves is anything to do with sexuality, they are deluded. Prostitution is to do with power - women feel powerless over their lives, so give in and allow themselves to be used and abused.

I don't think there are many schoolgirls whose ambition when they grow up is to be a prostitute (or a cammer, or a poledancer, or any sort of sex worker).

scurryfunge · 10/02/2011 23:06

ObnoxiousF, I think FunnysIn was being ironic.

ObnoxiousFucker · 10/02/2011 23:07

I know Grin. But this thread seems to be derailing itself, and I was told to come over here.

scurryfunge · 10/02/2011 23:10

It has gone wrong that is for sure. Smile

Too many people thinking abuse is ok Sad

QueenBathsheba · 10/02/2011 23:11

I don't think there are many schoolgirls whose ambition when they grow up is to be a prostitute (or a cammer, or a poledancer, or any sort of sex worker).
I wouldn't place bets on that. Too many young women think that pole dancing and webcamming is great fun, harmless and liberating. Too many young people are being exposed to pornography on the net, some young women do aspire to it because they think it's glamerous. Sad really.

FunnysInTheGarden · 10/02/2011 23:12

yes scurry irony is often lost on those who call themselves a username so near in sentiment to our own dear AF.

OF, who the fuck are you, and who told you to come over here?

LDNmummy · 10/02/2011 23:14

Anyfucker

'Cos you can't be bothered to scroll...

GORGEOUSX Thu 10-Feb-11 19:36:43
AnyFucker Your posts are foul and disgusting - with a name like that I couldn't really expect otherwise.

Not cos I cannot be bothered to scroll, just to be precise as to which post you meant. Besides, as I said, it was to point out your initial language towards other people, you had already begun picking on people and she was pointing it out. Harshly yes, but not unfairly IMO. If you can dish it out then be prepared to take it too.

Right, actually off to bed now, just had to check that out.

blueshoes · 10/02/2011 23:19

I am not from punternet. Whatever that is.

LDN and MrSpoc's opinions are hardly outlandish. Quite happy to endorse them. LDN, I do admire your energy to argue with these ladies.

AnyFucker · 10/02/2011 23:20

LDN...you think it acceptable then that GORGEOUSX had no previous input to the thread

she just piled in to slag me off ?

haven't you had a good look around MN in the last couple of days ?

at the risk of repeating myself, I didn't post on his thread after last night, until 6pm

so the level of vitriol was totally out of order

yes, there have been insults slung all day long today

but I have been at work Hmm

StuffingGoldBrass · 10/02/2011 23:22

But there are lots of jobs that can involve physical risk and psychological stress and burnout. Think, for instance of the unskilled care worker. Given the profiteering and corner-cutting that seems to go on in a lot of private residential care homes, the care worker is at risk of lasting physical damage (back injuries from lifting heavy patients without proper equipment/training), physical assault (some of those in need of longterm care can be unpredictable in their behaviour), exhaustion and despair at seeing suffering that can't be alleviated - and the work often involves having to overcome a certain amount of physical disgust (I am NOT saying that people with physical or mental health issues/the elderly are inherently disgusting, but care work usually involves having to clean up a fair bit of shit and vomit).
Unskilled care workers do this for generally not much more than the minimum wage. Some of them might well think that sex work is no worse and more lucrative and a lot of those who tell the sex worker to go and scrub floors or stack shelves or whatever are those who are not themselves in a position to have to choose between menial work or sex work.
SO much of the hostility towards sex workers (from both opponents and indeed some customers) still comes from this idea that sex is simultaneously sacred and disgusting, when the truth is that it's just sex. What you make of any sexual encounter, whether it's commmercial or recreational, is up to you. If people were less hung up about it and less convinced that heteromonogamy is the only type of sex that's 'real', then the stigmatixing of sex workers and their customers would decrease and that would make things better all round. Just like a sensible decriminalisation policy would remove a lot of the negative effects of 'illegal' drug use.

AnyFucker · 10/02/2011 23:23

and she has done one anyway, so < shrug >

adamschic · 10/02/2011 23:26

SGB, it's so wrong that you compare a care worker on min wage with a prostitute earning a lot more. Who is doing a worthy job?

meretrix · 10/02/2011 23:27

Ok, have just come back to this thread after an evening out with friends.

I'm going to bed and back to my normal posting name now.

Despite the disagreements on here, thank you for not having a go at me personally (in public anyway).

And OP if you do come back to this thread, please read my posts and have a really, really good think about this.

P.S. Am certainly not from punternet in case anyone was wondering.

AnyFucker · 10/02/2011 23:29

I didn't think you were from PN, meretrix

maryz · 10/02/2011 23:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

QueenBathsheba · 10/02/2011 23:30

AF GORGOUSX did have some previous input into the thread, her first post was at 16:42.

Please don't tell me off!

meretrix · 10/02/2011 23:30

Smile phew.

Night, night everyone.

scurryfunge · 10/02/2011 23:33

maryz.....SGB has a vested interest in perpetuating the sex industry regardless of victims. Treat her as a batty opinionated aunt Grin.

Just nod and smile.

AnyFucker · 10/02/2011 23:36

Queen, but she didn't have any previous conversation with me

Like I said, I walk into the thread at 6pm after being off MN all day and BAM

It wouldn't be unreasonable to expect some warning of a tirade like that

she is one of those posters from another forum, described by MNHQ as being deliberately provocative and winding up regulars

MN has been full of them in the last couple of days

AnyFucker · 10/02/2011 23:37

Mary..haven't you seen sgb's posts before ?? Grin

She is consistent, I'll give her that

adamschic · 10/02/2011 23:41

I like reading SGB's post as an independent woman but sometimes it all too much. Maybe I'm missing something?

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