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AIBU?

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Original poster

My childs future Godparent groped me

280 replies

Changedhername · 04/02/2011 16:23

To cut a very long story short me and OH have a friend who is in his seventies and last year lost his wife.
Me and OH are alot younger then our 'friend' and we let him spend Easter/Xmas etc with us as he told us how lonely and bored and sad he was.
We even asked him to be Godfather to my youngest(DS 2 aged 7m).My eldest(DS 1 age 2.5)loves our friend as he acts like the lovely grandad.
Anyway over the months he has been coming around during the daytime while OH is at work and I would make him lunch etc and he would play with DC..
Around two weeks ago he asked me what it felt like to have such a big bust and after that he grabbed my breasts and fondled me.
I grabbed his hand and told him he should not touch me in that way ever again and how dare he do that etc.
He then started shouting at me 'how dare you hurt my feelings and push my hands away..you horrible person'!
Anyway I've told OH that he gives me the creeps and he got 'touchy feely' and that's why I've ignored him recently.
I just admitted to OH that he touched my breasts and OH said 'are you sure you didn't ask for it'?
OH says he blames me!Maybe I shouldn't have been so nice and asked him aroundConfused
Oh and to top it off said 'friend' is calling my house number and mobile everyday(10 to 20 times)and in the last 2 weeks he turned up at my house staring at me through the window and wouldn't go away.
I feel like I shouldn't have been so friendly with him-he now thinks he owns me.
I don't think he's a bad person he's just obsessed with me.
We live close and go to the same places.He's left me voice messages saying 'have you got a problem'? etc..
Don't know how to handle this situation.
Thanks for reading
(I've been here a while but name changed)Smile

OP posts:
TrollyMcTrollPants · 04/02/2011 20:42

Oh bugger! No, RevoltingPeasant The one about you came up whilst I was typing, sorry. The one before...

Original poster
Changedhername · 04/02/2011 20:45

Revoltingpeasant-thank you for your reply.I can relate to you totally.Thanks againSmile

OP posts:
manicbmc · 04/02/2011 20:48

The way I read it - and I may be wrong - was that the OP's oh had kind of tired of the old man coming round and said what he said in an 'I told you so' way rather than not believing what had happened.

I do think that the oh should be having a serious chat and if that doesn't work then it might be time to log everything and call the police. Just because he's 70 doesn't mean he can't be a nasty manipulative old letch.

RevoltingPeasant · 04/02/2011 20:51

Trolly no probs :)

Argh now even I don't know if it's real or not (stopping caring tbh).

Changed, erm, if you are a longstanding poster do you feel comfortable 'coming out'? Just to put this to bed? It's not actually helping you anymore, this thread, if it is real, as you are just getting abuse and not advice.

Also since I know people who were sexually assaulted by people they trusted in their own homes I'm finding all this hoo-ha a bit depressing and shall piss orf to another thread.

softglowsandmaybes · 04/02/2011 20:52

OK this is either a wind up or the OP is being niave to believe the whole mafia, affairs and colourful life etc.

So, benefit of the doubt then.

The bullshit by the old man, probably believes it himself tells the stories to make himself feel good. Totally wrong for him to be touching you, i couldn't continue to have him in my life. I definately don't think you should be scared of his "mafia" connections. He just sounds like a sad old fucker who has got a crush on you. He overstepped the mark and you are within your rights to inform the police and you should if he doesn't leave you alone.

Original poster
Changedhername · 04/02/2011 20:53

Haha anyfucker!I will refuse to take offence from youSmile

OP posts:
Original poster
Changedhername · 04/02/2011 20:57

Thankyou everyone tonight who has taken the time-I will show this to df.Thankyou so much againSmile

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 04/02/2011 20:59

why would you take offence ?

if your story is real, then obviously I am the mug here

you seem pretty wordly-wise now

not so, a few posts ago when you were getting sympathy for your plight

something not adding up here

but don't let me rain on your parade, the floor is yours

Original poster
Changedhername · 04/02/2011 21:00

Revoltingpeasant-sorry you feel that way.I have nothing to prove.Reply if you want and bugger off if you don't care..

OP posts:
TrollyMcTrollPants · 04/02/2011 21:02

Ok, after having a think, I don't think CHN would have actually ^believed^ the story about shady past/connections but if you are feeling intimidated and a bit vulnerable, which would be understandable after an assault, it does make you pause and think what if.

I think Revolting said it better at 20:31.

But I think you would be right to shoe this to your OH, OP.

After all, who knows what the Old Goat has said to him?

Original poster
Changedhername · 04/02/2011 21:03

Anyfucker of course my story is real(?)I am not trying to prove myself

OP posts:
LoveBeingADaddysGirl · 04/02/2011 21:04

Op I suggest you take some of that anger and direct it towards your dh and the old Romeo you thinks he can do this whilst being a friend of your dhs.

Original poster
Changedhername · 04/02/2011 21:06

I don't have any anger(?)I wish I did!!But thanks anyhowSmile

OP posts:
Hullygully · 04/02/2011 21:07

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Mouseface · 04/02/2011 21:08

Who is 'df' OP?

You sais you'd show the thread to 'df?'

AnyFucker · 04/02/2011 21:08

so, OP, you told me that "all I needed was a shag" out of the goodness of your chilled-out heart, did you

I would hate to see you a bit pissed-off Hmm

Mouseface · 04/02/2011 21:08

'said' sorry.

AnyFucker · 04/02/2011 21:09

< waves at hully >

kaid100 · 04/02/2011 21:10

To get a Bloke's perspective, Definitely YANBU. Your husband is possibly trying to play it down to not make a fuss with his old friend, but speaking as a bloke: if you genuinely think a woman might be sort-of interested in you, you don't start at the breasts.

The godfather-to-be was taking liberties, and you are well within your rights to say "I think it best you stay away from us" and to tell your husband you expect him to support you better in future.

Binfullofmaggotsonthe45 · 04/02/2011 21:10

The famous star he had an affair with wasn't Hattie Jacques was it? Only there was a documentary on BBC 4 the other night about a cockney driver to the stars in the sixties who slept with Hattie whilst he was driver her to the sets etc.......?

Binfullofmaggotsonthe45 · 04/02/2011 21:11

Driving

catsmother · 04/02/2011 21:19

Can't have been Binfull .... that was John Schofield who died in 2003.

softglowsandmaybes · 04/02/2011 21:24

ahhhh, that'l be right maggots, catsmother - doesn't of course mean that someone has seen the program that was on the other night and constructed a story around it? hmmmmmm

AnyFucker · 04/02/2011 21:26

cats...do you know who this perve with mafia connections who used to drive famous people, who had an affair with a famous actress who now gropes young women, who pulls the wool over previously fabulous blokes and turns them into cocks of the highest order, and persuades them it is a good idea for them to be godfather to a baby at the age of 70 is then ?

< draws a long, long breath >

AnyFucker · 04/02/2011 21:29

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