To tell my nanny she can't take days of for her wedding.

[Foreverondiet]

Have had same nanny for several years and each year she does some sort of retreat thing in June, 2 weeks. She is allowed 2 weeks holiday when she chooses and the rest when we choose (usually another 4 weeks worth).

Anyway she tells me she is getting married.... I think nothing of it until cleaner says did you know it was in September this year. I ask the nanny and she said, yes she was thinking she's take some unpaid leave. Try to push how much she needs, she wants another couple of weeks. I suggested maybe she wouldn't do the retreat this year but she was almost in tears and said she couldn't believe I wouldn't give her time of for getting married (she's going back home to eastern Europe to get married).

I asked her why she thought it would be ok, as I don't have enough holiday to cover it because we have already committed to go away with DH's parents. And yes I can take unpaid parental leave but this would be very expensive, and leave my boss being a bit annoyed with me.

The reason we have a nanny is that I have 3 DC, aged 4,7 and 9 months and its the only way I can work (full day nursery/childminder for baby plus after school would cost almost the same and this way she looks after older DC if they are ill or during school holidays).

Her wedding is on a Saturday and she works for me Mon/Tues and Thurs so its not as if she HAS to take time off, and if it really was that important to her why does she not cancel the retreat?

In terms of my SIL - I just made the point as someone said nannies could look after 5, was trying to make the point that I couldn't ask my SIL's nanny to look after 5(!!), when my nanny wouldn't even look after 2 during the day.

FGS, Posie, don't be so bloody patronising!

Teachers are bound by their contracts. Nannies are too! Some nannies will have contracts that state holidays must be during schools hols esp if they nanny for a teacher. This nanny has a contract which states she has 2wks of her chosing and 2wks of the OP's chosing. The OP has also said that when work commitments allow, she gives the nanny more time off.

Therefore, my point was that she cannot just expect to take her holiday in June and have 2 extra weeks in September. It is unprofessional to have no regard for that contract. As I said, the nature of both mine and DH's job have often made holidays difficult but you accept that as part of the job.