to think that some smokers are selfish f****?

[glitzalicious]

so DH and I took my mum (who we rarely see for geographical reasons) and 9-month-old DS for lunch at a pricey restaurant in London today. It was freezing but there were no seats available inside, so at the suggestion of the waitress we sat at a table outside, near a patio heater, and ordered what looked set to be a very nice lunch.
A few minutes after we sat down, a woman in her 50s and her younger male companion came and sat on the table next to us, and both proceeded to light up cigarettes, inches from DS's face (the tables were extremely close together, and he was sitting on my mum's lap, happily eating his lunch). DH very politely asked the man if they would mind not smoking so close to the baby, to which he replied: "It's a free country". His leather-faced companion then gestured to a table at the other end of the al fresco area, with no heater anywhere near, and said: "Nobody's stopping you from moving". DH was quite stunned, and said: 'I think that's quite inconsiderate; it's really bad for the baby", and the bloke said: "I know", before shrugging his shoulders and turning back to his haggard old witch of a friend. I couldn't believe that people could be so selfish; to expect my DS (who had been sitting there before them) to either inhale all of their carcinogens (the fact the guy acknowledged that his habit was harmful to DC was quite shocking) or freeze, just so they could get their nicotine fix. Why the f* did they not move? We did get up and try to cancel our order; it was too late so we had to sit, completely freezing, in the heater-free zone. I have no axe to grind with smokers; if someone chooses to poison their own body it's no one's business but their own. But I would never think that others should suffer just so I could indulge a habit, and if someone were to ask me to stop doing something (talking too loudly in a restaurant etc) I would be so mortified at the prospect of impacting someone's enjoyment of their meal I would stop immediately, as they have just as much right to a nice lunch/dinner out as I do.
People always go on about a 'right to smoke': AIBU to think that right extends only to a smoker's home, or a child-free area? My blood is still boiling over those bastards!

Yes some smokers are selfish...on the other hand, you could have gone elsewhere.

Where are smokers supposed to go??? I agree the man was very rude, and I personally wouldnt smoke near a baby, but that's because it would be my choice not to do so and I would certainly move if I hadnt noticed and someone pointed it out, but he is right, it IS a free country and people have the right to choose, you choose not to smoke and he chooses to. No-one can say either are right or wrong in that.

I like to think Im a considerate smoker, we dont smoke in our house, around our children or near anyone elses. It does infuriate me however, when walking up the road and people hand cigarettes straight in to my pushchair or one of my kids has had their hair singed before now, that is people not looking!

There is no such thing as personal responsibility anymore, if someone falls over int he street they sue the council for the condition of the pavement, never mind they probably wern't looking where they were going!

I agree with Mums in beds. I dont like people smoking around my children but it is MY job to keep them away from it.

understand your anger at what he said and how he said it

BUT

you did sit in a smoking area, and as such will encounter smoking.your only guarantee of smoke free was inside the restaurant.so by agreeing to seat outside yes likely to encounter smoking

Hmmm - I read a fair bit of the thread but couldn't quite keep up:

YANBU and YABU - I hate sitting on the fence but I can see both sides here.

Nailing my flag to the mast - I'm a "semi-retired" smoker. In other words, I used to be a proper smoker, now I enjoy "treat" cigarettes (2 or so per day). I could stop but it's my little vice and I enjoy it.

I would never sit next to a child (even outside) and blow fag reek in their face but if I did, it would have to be continuous and prolonged exposure for them to be harmed. So you are being a bit silly about this.
Yes, they were a bit intransigent, but then smokers have been pushed out into the cold everywhere.
Why does the fact that they were only having coffee matter? - they were still customers who paid.
Why did you say "leather-faced"? Why was her age relevant, or her companion's age? Was she actually a "haggard witch" - you sound very sneering.
Why would you choose a restaurant that only had two indoor tables - what??? And I'm sorry, but on the occassions I have visited London, fag reek has been the least of the pollutants I've wondered about!!
Disclaimer - I'm not knocking London, but the air quality is a lot less pure than what I'm used to up here in rural Scotland!! Same goes for Edinburgh or Glasgow by the way.
I do not smoke in the house ever. My measly 2 fags per day are smoked on the back doorstep.
I think if you had not made unecessary personal comment about the woman's appearance or the poshness of the restaurant etc. and stuck to the facts you may have had more sympathy.

i know this thread ha smoved on but in response to the OP.

YANBU when you say some smokers are selfish. thsi is true. also, some non-smokers are selfish. some mums are selfish, some non-mums are selfish...i coudl go on.

but YABU to expect that couple to move. you chose to sit outside where you knew smoking was permitted. you didn't have to eat at that restaurant. if it was full an dteh risk of someone smoking outside was unacceptable to you, then you just don't order, you find somewhere else.

those people had no need to move. their seat was just fine for them, they had no problem with tehir location. YOU were the one with the problem. therefore YOU should rightly have moved.

you were unreasonable to ask them to not smoke.

Next time you're in london get DH to take you u the oxo tower instead. I understand it's quite difficult to get in though.