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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

"but that doesnt stop you sorting me out does it?"

457 replies

EhFattyBumBum · 01/01/2011 14:21

In brief, mine and DPs sex life isnt the best. We have a nearly 2 y/o and having a tough time with his sleeping habits. We both also work f/t and are both often too tired to do anything, but when we do its great. No real complaints so far.

However, I have had thrush for about 3 - 4 days, very sore, very swollen, very itchy and just generally a bit miserable with it but hopefully its going away.

All last night DP is saying/hinting how I should have another drink and get pissed, and another, and "oooh the boy is tired maybe he will sleep for us tonight" to a generally less tactful "is your fanny still itching, maybe we can have an early night?".

I explain that not only am I still resisting the urge not to get a scouring pad, but he can catch it too and just pass it back to me if we did anything and sorry but I just dont think its the best idea.

He whinges that the one time for a little while that we get chance I have an excuse. I agree that yes it is shit that the one time we are BOTH awake I happen to have this.

Then, he says "well that doesnt stop you sorting me out does it?". I changed the subject, ignored him and he kept saying it.

We got to bed and more of the same, pawing me, grabbing hold of my hand and asking if that had thrush etc and eventually he tired of it and left me alone.

AIBU to now feel a bit offended by how he spoke to me? I felt like saying to him, yea I'll sort you out, now leave £20 on the nightstand.....

(namechange btw)

OP posts:
Folicacid · 01/01/2011 14:23

YUCK. He is being totally U.

It is a total violation to be pawing you and why should it be all about his needs?

LovePinkBitsOfMyHorse · 01/01/2011 14:23

can't he sort himself out?

rainbowinthesky · 01/01/2011 14:23

No advice I'm afraid but wanted to say I love your temporary name change!! Grin

deemented · 01/01/2011 14:25

Urgh. What a fucking wanker.

If he were mine i'd have told him to fuck the fuck off and then when he gets there to fuck off some more.

mutznutz · 01/01/2011 14:25

Lol that expression wouldn't worry me coming from my husband as I know he wouldn't mean it offensively.

Re the thrush, you shouldn't let it get that bad. Canesten Once tablet with the cream is brilliant Wink

LovePinkBitsOfMyHorse · 01/01/2011 14:26

Obviously yabu to not be aflame with lust at 'is your fanny still itching' though. Cannot accuse him of being anything less than innovative with his seduction techniques. Hmm

ChippingIn · 01/01/2011 14:31

I'm with LovePinkBits - how did you resist those advances??

Hmm

What a GIT - is he always this much of a prick?

You don't need creams etc just have a good wash/rinse with very warm salty water a couple of times a day for a day or two and you'll be better in no time.

gillybean2 · 01/01/2011 14:32

doesn't stop him sorting himself out either. Tell him he was out of order and you are hardly going to be in the mood with that kind of 'warm up', not now not ever!

cheekyseamonkey · 01/01/2011 14:33

Hand him the vaseline, some tissues and tell him to sleep on his arm for 10 mins. Tosser.

mutznutz · 01/01/2011 14:33

You don't need creams etc just have a good wash/rinse with very warm salty water a couple of times a day for a day or two and you'll be better in no time

No really, you do if it's bad as the Candida forms inside so that's where the medication needs to get to.

Now where's the gagging up smiley?? Lol

Original poster
EhFattyBumBum · 01/01/2011 14:34

Mutz, I tried the pessary with the cream, didnt work so took the capsule yesterday

I did tell him to sort himself out but he humphed and then muttered something about the temperature outside being warmer

prick. I hope he gets thrush on his perinium (or however you spell it)

OP posts:
Original poster
EhFattyBumBum · 01/01/2011 14:38

To everyone asking - his other seduction techniques are pretty awful and do make me not want to have sex even if I am in the mood.

I think one of his 'best' ones is to grab my boob and say "hmmm sex later?" as I am walking past with a rubbish bag or something Hmm

That one makes my hymen grow back instantly....

OP posts:
oldraver · 01/01/2011 14:41

He can sort himself out for the mere temerity of talking to you the way he did. Tell him had he had more tact you may of been up to it. Give him a tube of Canestan and to go an f apply liberally, kill two birds so to speak.

BTW you are not using an 'excuse' its a prefectly good reason to resist his charms

mutznutz · 01/01/2011 14:41

That one makes my hymen grow back instantly...

OMG mines just grown back reading it FPMSL!!!

ChippingIn · 01/01/2011 14:41

and you are with him why?

TrinityMotherOfRhinos · 01/01/2011 14:44

'that one makes my hymen grow back instantly'

I just snorted my schloer...... I cant spell that ...

Grin
hairyfairylights · 01/01/2011 14:46

Natural Bio yoghurt on a tampon over night never fails

and he is being a total arse. He can sort himself out if he's that desperate!

Original poster
EhFattyBumBum · 01/01/2011 14:48

Sometimes I ask myself that Chipping, hes not a total sex pest to be fair. He just takes what he thinks is a bit of a drunken joke too far and we rarely 'do it' but its no-ones fault, just one of those phases I guess.

Think he genuinely thought that if he 'seduced' me enough it would get me in the mood but to be fair Brad Pitt waving his balls under my nose won't give me the horn at the moment with this shitting thing that i have got.....

OP posts:
conniedescending · 01/01/2011 14:50

it wouldn't have killed you just to toss him off quickly though?

JaneS · 01/01/2011 14:52

I can't imagine Brad Pitt waving his balls around being that sexy, personally! Just think of that wispy beard he grew and imagine what it's like down below ... yeuch.

Can you leave Cosmo or something about the house purposefully open at one of the pages about this foreplay lark that women seem to like?

Original poster
EhFattyBumBum · 01/01/2011 14:53

It nearly go to that Connie just to shut him up.

But then I thought, nah, why the fuck should I?

OP posts:
SwearyMary · 01/01/2011 14:53

FGS, I would have pushed him into the bathroom, handed him some tissues and told him not to come out until he had sorted himself out!!

lmao @ hymen growing back!!!!

Original poster
EhFattyBumBum · 01/01/2011 14:55

LRD foreplay isnt really an issue, it was his approach last night and the fact that he didnt just piss off and leave me alone when he knew I still had thrush....

OP posts:
JaneS · 01/01/2011 14:59

Yes, sorry, I understand that, I was responding to your description of his usual seduction technique.

My deeply mature response to the thrush chat-up is basically just 'ewww, men gross'.

ChippingIn · 01/01/2011 15:01

conniedescending - are you ready for another break yet?

EFB - I didn't really mean because he's a 'sex pest' he just doesn't seem very caring/loving. A caring/loving person saying in a bit of a jokey way 'That doesn't stop you sorting me out does it Wink' would be fine (by me) but going on & on about it and asking if your hand had thrush as well, really is quite off and would make me feel like asking him to put money on the bedside table as well. He doesn't want you he just wants someone else to toss him off. It's just ick. Mind you, he generally just sounds a bit crass for my liking anyway, 'Is your fanny still itching, maybe we can have an early night' would never get me in the mood.

If that's his idea of seduction... it's no wonder he's not getting much action - thrush or not!