to think this mother should have asked...?

[shoesies]

I was on the bus yesterday with 13mo ds. There was another lady on there with a baby who looked around 8/9 months. The other baby was whinging quite a lot and the mother got a packet of cheesy wotsits out of her bag, opened them and started giving them to her baby.

The prams were right next to each other and ds (who will grab at anything) held his hands out when he saw the packet. The mum reached over and popped a cheesy wotsit right in his mouth! She then put another one in his hand and gave me a big smile.

I don't care if she wants to feed that shit to her own child but if you're a total stranger and you want to give someones baby something to eat shouldn't you ASK??!! (To be honest he gobbled it down in a flash and looked at me as if to say why don't I get that more often but that's beside the point...) Am I being an uptight middle class wotsit denier?

Lol, no I think she should have asked.
I once tried to give my friends nephew a skip crisp but was quickly told he had allergies for everything and I had to be very careful what I gave him.
YANBU

2 Wotsits are not going to kill him.. She was trying to be nice.

Oh yes, the other mother was obviously a lot lower class than you for feeding her child wotsits

I don't doubt that she shouldn't have fed your child but your last sentence says a lot about you and you don't seem very nice IMHO

"Am I being an uptight middle class wotsit denier?"

A bit. Its only a cheesy wotsit.

YANBU - she had no idea whether your child had any allergies or intolerances, so should not have given him any food without checking first. And that would be the same if it had been a stick of celery!

I know she was trying to be nice - but shouldn't she have asked me first? And bythemoonlight, that last sentence was tongue in cheek. it obviously didn't come across...

"Am I being an uptight middle class wotsit denier?"

Yes you are. however, you are right, she should have asked due to allergies etc.

YANBU, your child might have a milk allergy.

I would be very upset by this as I am jewish and they are not kosher, and I wouldn't want my child to eat them.

She should have asked.

Yes she should have checked first, but she was only being nice and you have come across as very nasty.

I didn't say she wasn't being nice .

I'm intrigued as to what the reaction would have been if I'd said it was an organic rice cake she offered him....

Depends if you referred to the rice cake as shit or not.

YADNBU - noone should feed your child or your pet without asking first! I'd have been furious if someone had fed DD crap at that age.

FWIW, your last sentence came across as totally tongue in cheek to me.

Well, nobody would be accusing you of being snobby about it....

No, I probably wouldn't have referred to it as shit. Does that make a difference?

Why does the OP come across as "not very nice" or "nasty"?! FFS someone put food in her baby's mouth without her permission, its not like other mum said "oo would your baby like one?" Its not about it being a Wotsit or a whatnot, its that she did this without asking - no its not ok, an apple wouldn't have been ok either?!

If my child's diet needed to be that restrictive I would pay a lot closer attention, anyway -- I think it was a nice spontaneous gesture.
YANBU to think she should have asked, but YABU to give it more than a moment's thought.

obviously someone who feeds her 8 month old wotsits is a danger to society and herself. you should have slapped her severly and reported her to the workhouse

OP, you sound like you might think you're being a bit U...

unclench OP

Haha are you Mylene Klass? Sounds like PFBitis to me.DS1 got organic fish etc when he was 1. DS2 (14 months) was sitting in the back of the car today scoffing quavers. Yes they are shit but, loosen up, they are not going to kill anyone unless they have allergies. Yes she should have checked with you, but the spirit of the thing is that her intentions were good therefore you are an uptight PFB wotsit denier. Not giving your child crisps does NOT make you a better mother than her you know.

'Not giving your child crisps does NOT make you a better mother than her you know.' really? personally i think not giving cheesy wotsits is better

yanbu - allergies etc but mainly because wotsits taste rank...now a nice monster munch ummm

I disagree. I am a size 16-18 and never got near junk food when I was young. It just made me desperate for it. The most sugar-focused young person I ever met was not allowed sugary food until he was 6 (son of GP). I am a great believer in allowing a bit of everything in a balanced diet. I have brought up both DSs like that. MIL could not believe her ears when she took DS one to a lovely cafe and out of all the sweet treats he chose an apple.

I gave another baby an organic rice cake a few weeks ago. I asked the uncle but not the mum who was very upset and having a row with grandma at the time, there I was thinking it was nice of me to distract baby while mum needed some time off.

Apparently not.