to think this mother should have asked...?

[shoesies]

I was on the bus yesterday with 13mo ds. There was another lady on there with a baby who looked around 8/9 months. The other baby was whinging quite a lot and the mother got a packet of cheesy wotsits out of her bag, opened them and started giving them to her baby.

The prams were right next to each other and ds (who will grab at anything) held his hands out when he saw the packet. The mum reached over and popped a cheesy wotsit right in his mouth! She then put another one in his hand and gave me a big smile.

I don't care if she wants to feed that shit to her own child but if you're a total stranger and you want to give someones baby something to eat shouldn't you ASK??!! (To be honest he gobbled it down in a flash and looked at me as if to say why don't I get that more often but that's beside the point...) Am I being an uptight middle class wotsit denier?

i don't care, i am really grumpy adn wotsits make me boak

It's not the wotsit that would worry but her dirty hands. YANBU.

yabu, i think you are overreacting a lot. if he was allergic then you would have probably been keeping a much close eye on the situation surely? and she would not have had opertunity to put it in his mouth. as it is, he's not even allergic to it so why on earth you are still moaning about it i do not know!

It's the PRINCIPLE at stake here.

No. She shouldn't have done it; but she was just being ad hoc and a kind Human Being by sharing.

A Health and Safety sheet should have been completed and submitted before the offering; all hazards including toilet habits, tape worms and nits explored with a full social history.
It wouldn't have been a bad idea to meet (both) Parents in their own social setting after perusal of the form.

Alternatively you might just accept that you met a nice Woman on the bus that fed your Child two single cheesey whotsits so as not to exclude; and she was just NICE and KIND.

Occasional crap food doesn't hurt your Child; but it hurts you. I hate to think about the uncontrollable angst you will feel later when Child will attend parties.(whispers; at soft play centres par example).

'Tis am whole new word of pain and nutritional depravity.

The Whotsit episode will pale into insignifence; despite the scars.

Nobody should ever stick food in a stranger child's mouth, be it a wotsit or an organic carrot stick. How ridiculous.

middle class

Sorry, you were on a bus, surely if you were middle class you wouldn't have been.

Other mum should have asked before giving but I think her heart was in the right place and your DS clearly enjoyed the unexpected wotsit treat...

It wasn't nice and kind, it was ignorant and stupid. She should have asked - out of politeness and not just because of allergies.

If this had happened to my DS (anaphylactic milk allergy) he would certainly have spent the rest of the day in A&E - she could have killed him!!

YANBU!!!!

YANBU, I would be cross if someone gave a wotsit to my baby.

this is the sort of thread were everyone ends up looking like a nob

Am I being an uptight middle class wotsit denier

Yes you are.

Ok, but most kids, like 98% are not allergic.

I too would have not even thought about it and would have popped a wotsit in a little kid's mouth while giving one to my little one in the buggy next to it.

It's the kind of thing I would do without thinking - and then think of it later and berate myself on mumsnet

Maybe she just didn't think.

She should have asked - when DD2 was about 7 or 8 months old we were at the school gates when I noticed she was choking on something - quickly whipped out a piece of pear another Mum had given her. She wasn't eating solids at the time, and although I didn't say anything I was livid!

This is the sort of thing that causes you a coronary with your first child, but by your second/third/etc you really couldn't give a shit. I am now mostly grateful to old ladies who offer tic tacs to my to yr old to stop her screaming on the bus

2 yr old!

I do accept that many mums would do this without thinking - but it is still the kind of thing that my nightmares are made of.

TheParasiteofChristmasPast - you're right and I'm well aware that I probably do. Not everybody has to deal with allergy issues and I try to make sure that I am always polite to well-meaning people who dement me by trying to give my DS chocolate.

YANBU to tink she should have asked. But YABU to be judgey about Wotsits.

My DS is 16 months. He looks about 8-9 months. He is tiny and not a good eater and I have been told to feed him whatever he will eat. Which is mostly crap. Crackers and crisps, chocolate fingers, custard, mini choc desserts. When I was first weaning him (on medical advice) he weighed about 8lb. I always worried about judgey looks and felt I had to explain myself.

Anyway even without all of that, Wotsits are no worse than Organix overpriced baby snacks. IMHO.

Maybe she should have asked, but she Was Being Nice.

Oh good lord. She thought she was doing a nice thing. Yes she should have checked first but can't you take it in the spirit was intended?

Am slightly despairing at the lack of ability of some people to take things in the spirit they were intended. Not very Christmassy, IMO

I'm not doubting her intentions - but she should have asked first!!!

If this had been a peanut M&M, would people be reacting differently? (Peanut allergies are much more widely understood)

she really should have asked - it's only polite.

greenbanans Yes, but it was a Wotsit. I hope (I expect) no-one would do that with a peanut M&M. I know there is a "principle of the thing argument, but the OP was about Wotsits being bad for you etc. I just think it's a shame

If your child had been allergic to whatsits you could have whipped it away fast. Think this is a bit precious actually and she was being kind and also, I think, sharing, which is very very important. I hope you said thank you.