to not celebrate Christmas anymore

[MummieDeckTheHallsOutHunnie]

For many reasons, I have not wanted to celebrate Christmas, including not sending cards to others! I am happy to put up the old tree for them and the children can decorate etc, I will cook the normal meal with all the trimmings, I bought them winter gifts and let them know that there will be nothing on Christmas day anymore as they know my feelings and have had them in the lead up, like new pj's, hats/gloves/scarfs/nice perfume/cosmetic sets that are available this time of year, and new party outfit etc...

[Limez]

No, I'm sorry - I think you mentioned that your children understood your reasoning but my question is: do they actively want this way of doing christmas? (cos you are 'doing' christmas, aren't you? despite the title of the thread) Would they CHOOSE this if they had power to do so?

If you you did answer this before, my apologies, I have scanned but don't see it.

[MummieDeckTheHallsOutHunnie]

Horton, I don't want what has been going with giving them the presents on the day, it has been lovely giving them the gifts bit by bit, they have loved them, appreciated them and enjoyed them!

[balia]

Oh I dunno - I get what OP is saying about all the pressure...we have a blended family and for various reasons don't get to see DSS as much as we might wish over the Xmas period. DD needs to spend time with her Dad, DS deserves a christmas, DH's family organise a special day on a contact day so that needs fitting in, my parents go to my DB's 24th, 25th & 26th because his DW would be really hurt otherwise (and we live near my parents and see them all the time, DB's family don't plus her parents have passed on...) but also want to celebrate with us and us with them...

Each to their own. We decided to take a step back from the full-on Christmas day bit a couple of years ago. We have a festive season with lots of lovely get-togethers and just chilling out and spending time as a family.

Have a gentle, healing, family time, OP.

[Jumpty]

Of course kids would love to get presents before Christmas, kids love presents any time. Doesn't change the fact they're getting a lump of coal on the day itself. Plus you said earlier they needed the gifts before Christmas - how so for the CDs and games? Btw, I didn't say anything about toys.

[ilovehens]

My maternal grandmother prevented my mother from celebrating Christmas and my mother was diagnosed with a psychopathic personality disorder at the age of about 30. She's one of the most nasty, disturbed people I've ever come across.

[MummieDeckTheHallsOutHunnie]

Your posts were implying that all they get is essentials!

The children are not getting a lump of coal or F* all on the day, they are not getting a shead load of presents in one day, and loads of drama etc...

[MaDuggar]

I feel for your kids :( Bet the first day back at school after the holidays is a bundle of fun for them! "what did you get for christmas?" "err nothing".

[MummieDeckTheHallsOutHunnie]

ILoveHens,

Lots of JW's don't celebrate Christmas including Peter Andrew who only started celebrating it when he became a father, I don't see the link to mental illness?

I am sorry for your mother x

[MaDuggar]

Why do presents equal drama in your world? Because so far, all you seem to have a problem with is gifts. Is it that you cant afford presents?

[MummieDeckTheHallsOutHunnie]

MaDuggar, they can list all of the gifts they have had already! they have not had nothing!

[Limez]

So they ARE getting s presents on the day?

Or they're not?

[MaDuggar]

JWs also dont do "half" christmas. No tree, family meal or anything like it at all.

[MummieDeckTheHallsOutHunnie]

Presents dont' equal drama as such, the other stuff means drama!

[Horton]

//I don't want what has been going with giving them the presents on the day

So what has been going on? I still don't get it!

[Limez]

What other stuff do you mean?

[MaDuggar]

Right, so its just the giving of gifts on Christmas Day you have aproblem with ... everythign else is ok (tree, dinner, games etc). Im sorry, I cant see what is possibly wrong with giving gifts on a certain day.

Do you give them their birthday presents on different days too?

[MummieDeckTheHallsOutHunnie]

They do spend time with family and have a nice meal on the day, well the two I know from kids school, do!

The example given by other poster was in relation to not celbrating Christmas and her mothers mental illness in later life!

[MaDuggar]

But you are doing the other stuff, you just arent giving gifts on teh actual day. Unless I am missing something??

[MummieDeckTheHallsOutHunnie]

MaDuggar, birthday present on birthday!

[Horton]

And okay, JWs don't do Christmas but unless you are one I don't really see what that has to do with it.

[MummieDeckTheHallsOutHunnie]

MaDuggar, I used to do a lot more!

[Limez]

Look, people are trying to understand what you are saying. We want to understand what you mean but its all very muddled.

You seem to answer in a way to keep the confusion up.

I'm genuiely interested in your christmas, and why you've got to this point but as it is I dont even understand whats not christmas about your christmas but you seem set on us seeing you as someone who is Not Celebrating Christmas.

[MummieDeckTheHallsOutHunnie]

The lady was trying to imply from what I can gather that her mothers mental illness was related to not having Christmas Day as a child, and I was providing an example of people who don't and don't all have mental illness as a result, I have read on here one person state their friend was angry at their JW parents for not celebrating Christmas, no mention of mental illness as a result!

[Kaloki]

Rockin I said

"sounds like you make things special for them without needing a "special day" to do so"

because people were suggesting that she was taking away the "special"ness somehow. But you know, enjoy being offended.

[MummieDeckTheHallsOutHunnie]

I am not set on not celebrating Christmas anymore actually. I did think I was not at the beginning of the thread and since then some people have pointed out actually it sounds like a quiet Christmas with the gifts to the children earlier and not sending out Christmas cards, and I think that is probably what it is!