to be get annoyed at being called Mrs..?

[bubbles22]

I have always kept my own name and so use Ms, although I am married.

This means I am Ms X, DH is Mr Y and my boys surname is Y too.

It always causes confusion and I am for ever being called Mrs X. This makes me sound like I am desperate to cling to a previous married name!

What do other ms's do when you get called Mrs? Do you ignore or correct? It sounds pedantic yet it feels really annoying. If I wanted to be a Mrs I would have become a Mrs Y.

AIBU to pick people up on it?

you can correct folk who assume,but politely,really in the grand scheme of things does it matter.

I get called Mrs BramblyHedge and I am not even married. However it grates even more when I get called Mrs DPsname.

Me - Miss X
DP - Mr Y
DC - FirstName Y

School always calls me Mrs Y in person, and Ms X in letters I was going to post an AIBU the other day about feeling cross about the 'Ms' but chickened out I would never call myself Ms or mark it on a form, but it seems petty to actually tell anyone not to call me it

I have the opposite - I'm Mrs but I get referred to as Miss!

I get called Mrs DPsname. We're not married and even if we were I would still have my own name and would never be a Mrs. It's not the most important issue ever, obviously, but it's a bit annoying.

It's not just people who don't know either, we get cards from his relatives addressed to Mr and Mrs Hisname, even though they know perfectly well we're not married (though maybe they're trying to tell us we should be!)

Quick question for the maried Ms's out there ... how do I address envelopes to you and your husband ... Mr and Mrs X or Mr X and Ms Y? I never know so usually go very informal and put just first names .... but I don't like to go informal. Help please.

I probably annoy some people but in that situation meandmybub I just put first names.

I don't think it matters. My DS1 has a different surname to the rest of us and I often get called Mrs and his name-I don't bother correcting.
I hate Ms- but if people want to use it I just let them-it isn't important.

YANBU to correct people. I dunno, IS it a reasonable assumption that a married woman would be 'Mrs'? I don't think it is, actually; sure, probably more people do change their names than not, but there are enough people who don't that you'd think people'd check.

On this: DP and I regularly go to a guesthouse we like. On the first visit, the very old-fashioned, courteous owner called me 'Mrs DP' and then something interrupted the conversation to stop me correcting him. He has called me this ever since and it's too late now... So when we are on hols I have a secret double life under another name

I am not married, never have been, I am Miss X, EXp is Mr Y, kids are (name) Y. I am forever getting called Mrs Y by school, it p's me off. There must be more divorced/not living together couples now than married one's, why can't they grasp this??!!

meandmybub well it depends on whether they have changed their name.

Some people are Ms Hername some people are Ms Hisname. I suspect that most people who use Ms would also keep their maiden name but not all.

So really the only way to be safe is to use first names or ask your friend what name they use.

meand - first names? Or if not, 'Ms LRD and Mr.Hisname' works fine. Same as you'd do for non-married people who live together, surely?

I would expect it to be Mr HisName and Ms MyName on an envelope.

Doesn't seem that complicated. If DH and I were not married you would not have this issue would you?

it sounds pedantic because it is pedantic

A Doctor called me Mrs today, I'm not married and never have been, I'm single. I corrected him with Miss.

LoudRowdyDuck I suppose the only way that a person knows what another person wishes to be called is to ask them.
I do think it is reasonable to call a married woman, 'Mrs' unless told otherwise.
I wouldn't feel bad about being corrected; but I suppose it would be incorrect of me to make the same mistake twice.
I don't really see this as an issue.
That's all I can say.

I'm DrX married to MrY. I do answer to MrsY on the phone etc but I would never introduce myself as that. I understand that most people assume that as we are married I am MrsY. Where I got married the name change is completely separate from the marriage ceremony.

What irritates me is when they see the name DrX and immediately talk to DH assuming it's him.

All of this is all well and good and as far as I know people in UK can call themselves any name they like as long as it's not to defraud but people doing this should understand that it can cause problems.

I used to work for a travel agent and a woman came in and booked 2 airline tickets in the names of let's say Mr Smith and Ms Brown. She had to come back in to give me their passport details when it transpired that her passport was in name of Mrs Smith as they were married. As the names on the passport and the ticket had to be the same the ticket had to be altered for which the airline charged her £25.

She completely 'lost it' and moaned at me for about 15 minutes about how unreasonable it was of the Passport Office to not let her passport be in her maiden name - as if it was MY fault.

I am Dr Boffin. Not Mrs, Dr. I like Dr.

Once when I was trying to claim on our freezer insurance the woman on the other end of the phone refused to let me, as she said it was in my husband's name and she could only speak to him directly.

I was very by this as I buy all the appliances in this house and they are all in my name. BoffinDad has little to do with it other than being expected to congratulate me on my thrify procurement, as well as lift things into place as required.

She refused to give in and it was all very frustrating.

I then realised after I had put the phone down that she had assumed I could not be Dr Boffin as that of course would be my husband.

Naturally.

Well, yes, LabMonkey, that would be annoying. Agree with that.

I had to tell DDs school to stop calling me Mrs and the hospital too! I gave birth before I was married and they kept calling me Mrs...I queried it and they said it was out of "respect!" so I told them to call me Miss and that was that!

'people doing this should understand that it can cause problems' - eh?!

Surely, the situation you describe is to do with someone being a bit dim and trying to use two names. It is nothing to do with wanting to keep using the same name/title you've always had.

It does piss me off that people so often act as if wanting to still be Ms LRD is me causing problems or making life difficult.

I'm with those that don't really like Ms. Both Mrs and Miss are abbreviations of Mistress.

We had a geography teacher at school who used to address as Mistress X or Y. Was just her way.