Sakura, maybe people were tutting because Starbucks sells hot drinks, so actually they were concerned that tiny little flailing arms could very quickly spill hot, scalding liquids over either your child or other people. This is also why my blood runs cold when I see small toddlers running amok in restaurants or anywhere hot drinks/gravy/other hot liquids are being served. It is an accident waiting to happen.
Our society has never been more tolerant of and more welcoming/protective towards children. Nobody is allowed anywhere near a child unless they have been vetted, car parks have special parking areas for parents, childrens food is rigorously checked for nutrition, allergies are carefully considered, nobody can take pictures anywhere near a child. Parks, play areas, museums, galleries and libraries bend over themselves to run family friendly activities, half term sessions, free admission for kids, teaching activities and so on. In many cases, doing so is rightly an important part of their being able to access public funding or Lottery grants. Every major environmental group or charity has a childrens programme. Children have specialist broadcasting channels on the media. A great deal of Govt money is now spent on early years provision and childrens health.
Breast feeding is widely tolerated and mothers in work now have the right to long maternity leave, to request flexible working and have a bombproof excuse to leave work at the drop of a hat to tend sick children and expect first go at the holidays.
Libraries and other public buildings reluctantly lock their toilets not because you have kids, but because the library staff are fed up with the toilets being vandalised or being used for injecting drugs. The lack of good public toilets affects many people not just parents.
And yes Sakura having children is to a certain extent a lifestyle choice. Most of the parents here chose to have the number of children they have. Women have never had better contraception more freely and widely available. Childless people like myself recognise the importance of raising the next generation, and support the judicious use of our taxes to do so, but don't believe that parenting absolves you of all responsibilities to consider your fellow human beings who just want to have a coffee in peace.
I've just come back from a few days away seeing my best friend (also childless). We went out for loads of coffee as I'd travelled over 200 miles to see her and a screaming toddler would not have added to our enjoyment, especially one that was likely to spill drinks all over us. Frankly I think she deserves a coffee in peace since she spent most of the last year nursing her terminally ill mum while her childed siblings watched her (too busy with their own little nuclear families to help). What made things even harder is that she works in an office of working mums - she is the only full time person who's not on some form of flexible working/job share etc. Could she get any extra time off to help her mum? No, of course not. In the meantime, she and all other women of childbearing age are now being looked on with increasing suspicion when we apply for jobs - frankly I often feel like stapling a note to any form - "It's OK, I can't have kids". This part of the village feels a bit cheesed off with being treated as nothing more than an admiring audience for your child, or as the reliable stalwart without any personal life in the office.