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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to dump a SMALL WILLY!

290 replies

gobbledegoop · 03/11/2010 13:55

Bit of backround for you, this is a fairly new relationship, he's a nice guy and wants everything i want from life but AIBU...... to finish with him because his willy is too small for me to get any satisfaction Blush

Ive been in relationships in the past where they have had sexual problems/issues and it's soul destroying, i've also had very satisfying sexual relationships so i know what it can be like.

Opinions please.............

OP posts:
gobbledegoop · 07/11/2010 14:02

Thr girth is ok. Going to try another few times, different positions etc and see how it is. Then i'll make a decision. Thanks everyone for your comments!

OP posts:
grapeandlemon · 07/11/2010 14:12

If the girth is good that's something, a really long one is kind of a waste as there are no nerve endings way back in your punani.

Good luck with whatever you decide!

thumbwitch · 07/11/2010 14:46

gobbledegoop - one that worked well for me with teenytodgered blokes was him sitting, me sitting on him facing him. Seemed to hit the necessary spots quite well! Requires a degree of athleticism that I don't think I'm capable of now but it worked very well back in the day. HTH

gobbledegoop · 08/11/2010 17:01

Hehe!
We've actually tried that one and i could hardly feel him Shock although out of all of them, that was probably one of the better positions!

OP posts:
theredhen · 08/11/2010 18:26

Well, I depend what floats your boat. Personally, I'm more interested in my partners tongue size than anything else. Blush

Asteria · 08/11/2010 18:46

I can sympathise - my first serious boyfriend was sadly hung like a button mushroom and no matter how much we tried it was crap for both of us, which is totally demoralising and really had an impact on the relationship. But we were young and I suppose hadn't the confidence to communicate and be inventive.
My most recent relationship was with a gorgeous guy who was too big and we lasted for two and a half orgasmic years inventing some very good ways to compensate (suffice to say he was a genius!).
Penetration is important because of the intimacy that it generates, but not necessarily the be all. How about putting it off for as long as possible - by the time you get to it you will be so turned on it won't really matter so much?

expatinscotland · 08/11/2010 18:58

Gah, what a hella amount of hard work for a new relationship.

Imagine 5 years down the line, when you're still have to be acrobatic just to get off.

A vibrator is less work.

Why sell yourself short, literally, seeing as that sex is obviously a big deal to you?

expatinscotland · 08/11/2010 19:00

I had a pal who thought she'd lost her virginity to a guy with a maggot.

But he hadn't even broken her hymen and the next chap she was with was a real eye-opener.

gobbledegoop · 08/11/2010 19:02

The first time i hadn't had it for ages and i felt even less that time because of ah- hem!... wetness Blush

OP posts:
classydiva · 08/11/2010 19:02

If you cared that much the size of his cock would not matter.

I had a bf once who had a willy the size of a thumb, a little thumb and that is stretching it.

The sex was awesome.

It's the chemistry, you clearly have none with him and are trying to foist it off on his cock.

QueenOfTheNight · 08/11/2010 19:02

'hung like a button mushroom' Fabulous, nearly sprayed the laptop with red wine!

To be honest OP I would dump him - as nicely as possible without mentioning downstairs dimensions of course. It obviously bothers you and it would me too. In a 'fairly new relationship' you're supposed to be having great, mind blowing sex and not be able to keep your hands off each other and if the sex isn't doing it for you now then five years down the road you're going to be as miserable as sin with your sex. Particularly if you can only do it in one position so you can actually feel him and he's not great at oral.

He might well be a lovely bloke, I'm sure he is, but if you feel like this now then I have my doubts that it would last anyway.

gobbledegoop · 08/11/2010 19:07

You are totally right expat and queen, i was thinking along the same lines myself especially as i'm looking for long term. I think this would REALLY bother me after a while.

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 08/11/2010 19:09

Oh, there was a better one years ago, when a poster described a bloke as having a 'cock like a marrow'.

expatinscotland · 08/11/2010 19:10

'It's the chemistry'

And sometimes, that chemistry comes from when you open up his trousers and a nice, fat cock spills out.

gobbledegoop · 08/11/2010 19:12

hahahahahaha! so true!

OP posts:
classydiva · 08/11/2010 19:13

I guess you gotta have something to suck, rather than only half a mouth full, I mean I bet the OP can still talk on the phone whilst blowing.

Porcelain · 08/11/2010 19:17

There are ways to get around this, if it's not lasting long enough for you, you can always look at drawing out foreplay so you get more time to get warmed up, you may find him more enjoyable then. A lot of arousal is in your head, so you may find ways around that, psychologically satisfying sex is way better than physically satisfying, this is why you want a partner not a sex toy.

You could also investigate positions that are more flattering for his "build" (try googling sex positions for small penis, there are loads of pages of info - oddly enough) or consider toys like a cock ring, or even a strap on (for him, unless you are into that).

It's really not the end of the world, and if that is his only "flaw" you should be hanging on tight!

QueenOfTheNight · 08/11/2010 19:22

I missed 'cock like a marrow' but am still enjoying 'angel poo' from a thread last week.

I'm guessing - probably not great guesses from your posts - that this is already really affecting how you feel about him anyway.

Maybe I'm a selfish, shallow moo but I couldn't settle for someone who didn't satisfy me sexually just cos he was nice. Unless you're a really special kind of a person (and I'm not Grin) then putting up with crap sex, particularly early on in a relationship when it's supposed to be great, just can't be sustainable in the longer term whatever other great qualities the bloke might have.

gobbledegoop · 08/11/2010 19:26

Angel poo? enlighten me?!

I guess it is affecting the way i feel about him, i am already not wanting to see him very often which is not normal for a new relationship...

OP posts:
piratecat · 08/11/2010 19:31

expat hahahaha!!!! made my day that has!

QueenOfTheNight · 08/11/2010 19:33

An angel poo is one that results in zero soiling of the toilet tissue on wiping.

here

No you're right it's not normal. My way of looking at it is that life is just too short. We shouldn't waste our time on things that aren't right for us just because we feel sorry for someone and don't want to hurt their feelings. They might live 20 years longer than us!

JingleTits · 08/11/2010 19:44

pmsl at angel poo Grin

gobbledegoop · 08/11/2010 19:49

hehe, you learn something new every day...

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 08/11/2010 20:18

'Maybe I'm a selfish, shallow moo but I couldn't settle for someone who didn't satisfy me sexually just cos he was nice. Unless you're a really special kind of a person (and I'm not ) then putting up with crap sex, particularly early on in a relationship when it's supposed to be great, just can't be sustainable in the longer term whatever other great qualities the bloke might have.'

Nail hitting head.

And that goes not just for cock size, but also men who won't give or receive oral, because I love both, who are only interested in sex in a bed in one position (no spontaneity), men who want to swing, want butt sex, etc.

A whole host of things that means we won't be sexually compatible, and yes, for me, small willy is on that list.

Different situation if a person physically changes over time and isn't able to go out the way we did when we first got together and spent days in bed, couldn't wait to get each other's clothes off, etc.

But at the very beginning of a relationship? Yeah, for me, sex is really important, penetration by him and orgasm from that, both mine and his, is important to me and so I sought men who felt the same.

Plenty of nice ones out there with whom you might be more compatible.

Life is too short to court bad sex, IMO.

QueenOfTheNight · 08/11/2010 20:18

Too right! I'm always learning stuff from this site!

Seriously though OP, I hope you get things sorted for the best.