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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To have splatted a half eaten ice cream cone on his head?

324 replies

AlwaysMeanWellOftenWrong · 29/10/2010 20:19

Husband arrived home from work. Kids and I had finished our tea and were eating our ice cream. He heated his up in microwave and joined us at the table. Sausage, mash, onion gravy, carrots and sweetcorn.

'oh, I'll just get some brown sauce' - he jumps up and goes and gets it. I say 'EEERR thats gross, try it without first.' He starts to squeeze - 'just try it first (nervous laugh to make him feel like I am not 'telling him' although this is obviously lost in translation)as the bottle of brown sauce is then lobbed across table and onto floor, DS4, DD1 and mother all look on mouths gaping, although mother then remembers that such childish ways of communication are quite commonplace from him.

Mother thinks (in a very quick flash) - all these things all at once - I am angry because he has had yet another 'tantrum', I am angry at myself for even saying anything anyway, he wasn't trying to say my food was tasteless, he just wanted extra flavour. And I decide to let it go and just carry on eating my ice cream... then I look up at him and he is glaring at me as if I am the wife from hell. Something inside me just releases and I just cannot resist, 'splat'! I didn't really think about it, and I am still not entirely sure of my motives but I think it was 'well, if he is going to have a tantrum, so will I'! And I certainly did not consider the consequences!

I could tell he was extremely angry by the rage in his eyes - which to me seemed absurd, to be so angry at such as silly thing, so I laughed, so much and so hysterically that I looked quite deluded, so I left the room to put the kids bath on.

About 10 seconds later, hubby was upstairs getting ironing board out 'What are you doing, you should eat your tea it will get cold' - yes you guessed it - its in the bin!

Of course, my trip wire is finally pushed right over the edge and rage erupts as I think of how ungrateful he is and feel really annoyed at him trying to punish me by making me feel guilty that he now has had no tea.

I know I was unreasonable. I know he was unreasonable. I also think it is so funny and thought you all must deserve a laugh!

We are still out of sorts with each other because I am always the first to apologise, have been for 9 years, but tonight, I am just waiting for him to decide enough is enough and that he wants to make amends. I will let you know if he ever does - very doubtful!

I will end up saying sorry, then he will say sorry. I don't think I will be able to let it go on much longer.

AAAHH, the joys of having a marriage to uphold!

OP posts:
southeastastra · 29/10/2010 20:20

blimey some anger issues there, quite shocking

otchayaniye · 29/10/2010 20:22

pinteresque

FetchezLaVache · 29/10/2010 20:23

Good lord.

spookyhalloweenFluffypomkins · 29/10/2010 20:23

Confused?

SocialButterfly · 29/10/2010 20:23
Biscuit
onepieceoflollipop · 29/10/2010 20:24

My initial thought is concern for your poor children who are growing up with 2 very angry parents. :(

Perhaps you will get other replies who agree with "also I think it is so funny and thought you must all deserve a laugh." Hmm

So, he arrives home and reheats his dinner. You make an unnecessary comment about the sauce. He over reacts massively and throws a sauce bottle to the floor. You put your icecream on his head. He is very angry and you laugh hysterically. Hmm

You both sound very very angry and it sounds a very unhappy marriage/set up.

BoysAreLikeDogs · 29/10/2010 20:24

the narrative flicking between first and third person is veh confusing

noblegiraffe · 29/10/2010 20:25

Crikey, what are you children learning from this insanely childish behaviour?

izzywizzywoowooo · 29/10/2010 20:26

Why couldn't the poor bloke have some brown sauce Confused

scottishmummy · 29/10/2010 20:27

you are absolute heidbanger,ned with anger issues.and a long descriptive narrative cant disguise fact you are bonkers

but given you both think this is heefuckinlarious then you deserve each my kyle other.the jeremy kyle show beckons for you both

do you have matching shell suits?
his & her tatts
dog on a rope

taintedpaint · 29/10/2010 20:27

Oh my. Yes, anger issues definitely. None of that was funny. None of that should've been witnessed by your DCs.

Don't really know what else to say. Biscuit

readinginsteadnowisundeadnow · 29/10/2010 20:28

Wind up. Def.

MsKalo · 29/10/2010 20:28

It's not good for ur kids to witness this - maybe you could think about counselling? X

AlwaysMeanWellOftenWrong · 29/10/2010 20:29

Sorry about third and first - i am shattered as both my children have a vomiting bug at night and I am awake half of it. Plus, I am no expert in writing.

OP posts:
woopsidaisy · 29/10/2010 20:29

People like to add certain things to certain foods. My DH always puts brown sauce on sausages...that is how he likes it.Why did you pick on him when he came in? Surely he is allowed to eat his dinner as he wishes? Without you watching and telling him it is gross? Sorry,but that would REALLY annoy me! However,he was BU when he threw the bottle,you were BU with the ice cream Shock,and you are both BVU to act like this in front of your DC!?
Perhaps you guys need some together time,or maybe councelling? Just to get the build up of issues/tension/stress/anger out-and they do build up in marriages!

scottishmummy · 29/10/2010 20:30

dont sweat it someone will rock up and say oh we do that too hun,dont let dem snobby cows on mn tell you whats right,whats not

onmyfeet · 29/10/2010 20:35

Some people just like sauce. Confused

PaisleyPumpkin · 29/10/2010 20:36

I don't think you'll be together much longer - it sounds as though you hate each other.

Boobalina · 29/10/2010 20:37

Oh dear - sounds pretty bad if adding a condement to your supper ends up like this. Sounds like my marriage.... we just separated and me, him, the kids are all soooo much happier.

Things are pretty wrong when shit like that happens, also, really scary for the kids - they must be on edge a far bit if random things like this can happen. I know mine were. And when I was growing up, and my parents did things like that - I would be very silently terrified.

There is nothing funny in the situation... its achingly sad all round :(

izzywizzywoowooo · 29/10/2010 20:38

I just dont get why you got so angry at the fact he wanted sauce?! Confused Are you like that with everyone who might like some sauce??! Sounds like you treated your OH like a child tbh.

All a bit weird.

scottishmummy · 29/10/2010 20:40

Jeremy kyle has category just for you for eye popping, cone hurling ravers

AlwaysMeanWellOftenWrong · 29/10/2010 20:47

izzywizzywoowoooo I hope you are not condoning splatting ice cream on your kids heads because they want sauce!

OP posts:
LittleMissHissyFangs · 29/10/2010 20:47

If I walked in to a tea that I had to heat up, and someone told me how to eat it, I'd be hurling it into the bin too.

IF THIS IS REAL, you caused this whole farce. In front of your children, and for what? a squirt of brown sauce on a meal that is literally crying out for it.

Brown sauce was made for that dish FGS.

It's use is nothing to do with your culinary skills, it is a condiment pure and simple.

Now if you'd done some fantastically complicated delicately spiced seasoned dish, I'd have been inclined to screw my nose up and think to say something, but you did nothing out of the ordinary, bangers, lumpy mash potato, gravy and veg. Bravo!!

Even though am hardly known for ability to STHU, I'd more than likely I would have said nothing, but just think it and twang my judgy pants.

Oh good, we are in AIBU... YABU.

Grow up, this behaviour will harm your DC. FFS, if you are like this on a squirt of brown sauce, What are you like on proper serious matters?

Go and apologise, to him and to your DC.

Seriously, if my OH treated me like this, I'd not stick around. Think about it.

HonestRich · 29/10/2010 20:47

I like brown sauce sarnies.... they very yummy.

AlwaysMeanWellOftenWrong · 29/10/2010 20:50

paisleypumpkin - I suspect we will be together on our death beds.

We have an extremely happy and marriage. We work very hard at keeping it fresh and full of love.

We have never had an argument that has lasted more than 10 mins.

We usually kiss and make up very quickly - both apologising to the other.

We never argue about money, sex, work, friends, affairs, buying things, wanting different things... compromise is commonplace as is working towards a shared goal.

Tonight, I just didn't do my usual style of letting things go. I just went with the inner child. Once, in 9 years - I hardly think that can end our marriage!!!

OP posts:
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