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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

DSD abortion thread part II

946 replies

GivesHeadlessHorseman · 26/10/2010 21:05

carry on ladies....

OP posts:
SoloBlackWidowSpidersWebSite · 28/10/2010 12:16

Can you get the ring in the UK now?

thesecondcoming · 28/10/2010 12:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

missismac · 28/10/2010 12:23

Can Herpes/ std's be passed on through the parents? I know that syphilis can, but others? Really?

Discowife · 28/10/2010 12:24

I didn't know that TSC... or did you ust tell her that...

Scaredandalone · 28/10/2010 12:24

yes ring in the uk now here

SoloBlackWidowSpidersWebSite · 28/10/2010 12:25

Not sure that's right thesecondcoming. Also if an infected woman has herpes and has an attack at the time of the due date (just before I suppose), then I believe that a CS is planned. I know giving birth vaginally during an attack can cause blindness in a baby.

ZombiePlan · 28/10/2010 12:25

Stuff like HIV and hepatitis can (I think) be transmitted during delivery and breastfeeding. Think that's why youi are recommended to have a c section if you have those conditions or a herpes flare up around your due date.

thesecondcoming · 28/10/2010 12:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Discowife · 28/10/2010 12:31

ah had my suspicions TSC! Grin

3thumbedwitch · 28/10/2010 12:34

oral herpes can certainly be passed from parent to child, but not quite sure whether oral and genital herpes are related. And I don't mean anything disgusting here - just if someone has oral herpes and they touch their mouth and then go to the loo, they could transmit the virus to the genital area but I don't know if that's relevant.

Scaredandalone · 28/10/2010 12:35

3thumbedwitch ewwwwww I am trying to eat my lunch here yuck.

QuintessentialShadows · 28/10/2010 12:36

I really feel for the boy and his parents in all this, too. Tess dsd has made her choice.

But, the boy has no choice in the matter and can only stand by and watch the girl while she decides whether she will keep the baby or not, and he has no say. She may chose whether she becomes a parent or not, but he does not have this "luxury". There may not be much support for the girl from the boy and his parents either.

SoloBlackWidowSpidersWebSite · 28/10/2010 12:37

That's true thumb. I can remember (distant memory) avoiding kissing anyone that had coldsores (herpes simplex b I believe).

scaryteacher · 28/10/2010 12:37

'I think the posters who say they know their children or their children's friends would never do something like the OPs daughter are being VERY naive.' Not naive, but very aware and watchful. We are abroad, his friends all go to the same international school, and my ds doesn't get out much, he goes to school on the bus and comes home on the bus and is not allowed off campus at lunchtimes.

He does 2 or 3 afterschool activities which are all supervised, homework and at weekends sleeps a lot; he may go over to a friends house to sleep over, but the Mums are much the same as me and well up to speed.

As for teaching them about contraception - he's been told he has to wear at least 40 condoms at a time by which time the urge will have passed! He knows damn well he has to wear a condom, but equally having been pegged as one of the geeky crowd at school, peer pressure won't at the moment come into this. I also know he doesn't have girlfriend yet because he still hates having a shower and cleaning his teeth, and he'd be doing both voluntarily if he had rather than me threatening him with a hose in the garden.

3thumbedwitch · 28/10/2010 12:38

scaredandalone, HOW is that worse than the lipstick party thing?? Confused

DinahRod · 28/10/2010 12:38

Discowife, OTBT threads is Off The Beaten Track found in 'Topics - Other Stuff'. It gives an extra layer of privacy if you want to discuss sensitive stuff but obviously it doesn't get such through traffic as in Active Convos.

dontdisstheteens · 28/10/2010 12:39

I have three boys. In the study is a biggish box of loose condoms. (I stock up at Macro Grin). All the boys know they are there. They all know that no questions will be asked if I have to stock them up. They have all been told that they can give hem to any friend (male or female) that they think might be at risk. Indeed I know that several friends know it is there!

I don't know if this will stop any of my lads getting a young girl pregnant but I bloody well hope it will. It does mean that they will never have an excuse - and I have told them this. If they get anyone pregnant they are responsible. We also discuss STDs - often at Sunday lunch when we are all together and frequently have friends round! Ha I am the MOST embarrassing mother in town!!!

Mind you two teenage girls (friends of son number one) have approached me for help/ advice about contraception so I can't be that fierce.

Scaredandalone · 28/10/2010 12:39

QuintessentialShadows A very valid an excellent post. More reason why boys should take contraception serious for one thing how would a man feel if 16 years after sex a teenager was droped on his door step and he had been denied the chance to be a part in his childs life. Once a pg occurs women really do have all the choice.

DinahRod · 28/10/2010 12:39

It doesn't show in active convos and, afaik, doesn't show up in search.

spidookly · 28/10/2010 12:39

"But, the boy has no choice in the matter and can only stand by and watch the girl while she decides whether she will keep the baby or not, and he has no say."

He had his say when he decided to ejaculate inside a classmate for a dare.

Discowife · 28/10/2010 12:40

threatening him with a hose in the garden

Grin boys ARE gross.

SoloBlackWidowSpidersWebSite · 28/10/2010 12:40

But Quint, he did have a choice. He could've chosen to not do the deed or he could've chosen to use a condom. It's not all down to the girl in question and I know I don't need to say that really...

The only thing he gets no choice in is whether the baby lives or dies prior to 40 weeks.

spidookly · 28/10/2010 12:40

"Ha I am the MOST embarrassing mother in town!!!"

Embarrassing mothers are the best :)

Discowife · 28/10/2010 12:41

Really agree with spidookly

tyler80 · 28/10/2010 12:41

They're related, although slightly different viruses. You can still get genital herpes (a slightly different form) from a cold sore and vice versa.

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