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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not want my son to be friends with a classmate who's parents smoke

203 replies

MooMooFarm · 19/10/2010 20:47

DS has recently made a new friend at infant school. I chatted to the mum in the playground; she was ok but I noticed straight away she smelt very strongly of cigarettes - she & the boy's dad take turns doing the school run and both of them always have a butt end in their hand (no exaggeration). DS invited the boy to his birthday party at a play centre, the mum & dad spent the whole time outside a pub opposite, pints in one hand, fags in the other.

The mum suggested they got together for a play date, so I invited her son (& her) to ours after school. DS wanted to travel in their car so he did, following my car. By the time they got to mine DS smelt of smoke too, so I can only assume she smokes in the car. She left her son at ours & collected him later, but honestly, just her son being in the house made our house stink of cigarettes.

Anyway so now she has asked when DS would like to go to hers, and I don't want him to. I am assuming because her son smells of smoke too, that they must smoke around him, in the car, in the house, whatever. I don't want DS to go there, because I don't have the balls to say 'yes but can you not smoke around my son please?'. I just want him to make a different friend.

Yes I am paranoid probably, but none of my family/friends smoke, and frankly I think it's a disgusting thing to do around children, and makes me wonder about somebody's parenting abilities in general TBH.

Sorry this is so long...

OP posts:
FrameyMcFrame · 21/10/2010 19:31

I agree with Belligerent...
But fortunately I do smoke and I'm going to have one for you all now :)

DomesticG0ddess · 21/10/2010 19:35

BG, I think you'll find it's the noxious toxins people are scared of, not the attitude [hsmile]

wickedorwhat · 21/10/2010 20:55

I am a smoker but i dont smoke around my friends kids cos i guess i am embarassed that i smoke at all. for heavens sake why is it such a big issue when for the past 80 years people have smoked and it was once fashionable. processed foods are just as damaging, car fumes, living next to an electricity pylon, plastic drinks bottles practically everything in our lives is killing us, life is short, the kids grow up so quickly, what the hell. smokers do stink tho and i am one!

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