To be really fucked off with my family.

[Huskyflodynamo]

I have a bad cold, the 'feel like death warmed up' type where you can't stop shivering and just want to take to bed til it's all over.

6month old ds has a sniffle and is being totally clingy, whiney and just wants to be carried everywhere. I am obliging because it is my responsibility to make sure his needs are met above my own.

This morning, I asked dh to stay at home because I feel so shit and had no sleep. He went to work anyway and I rang my mum who lives two miles away if she would mind popping for an hour to mind ds while i catch up on some sleep. She declined and said she is tired and has things to do.

I have two sisters who live within 5 minutes drive but they are busy as well. One is having a riding lesson after work and the other is going to a wedding show with her friend.

I absolutely cannot rely on my family to help me out in a situation like this and it pisses me off. My sisters don't have kids so they don't understand how hard it can be. I know people have their own lives to lead but ffs surely family comes first?

Exactly JinnyS, not BU to ask, but if the answer is no, then what can you do?

No-one is saying that they are a supermother, but it is amazing what you actually can do whilst ill if you have to. A lot of it is mind over matter - I read a book recently that claimed that you can recover quicker from illness if you believe that you are well (could be bollocks though ).

ha, no, you're right, i don't know the mother.

you're funny.

Don't think you're being unreasonable in being upset but by the same token I don't think your family are being unreasonable in carrying on with their lives either. It's just one of those crappy things and I feel for you. Good luck.

Me and DW haven't managed more than 3 hours sleep per night since Sunday because DD has a bitch of a cold. DW now has it as well. I got to sleep at 5am this morning, had to get up at 0630 and come into work to submit 3x reports by 1300. Feel absolutely crap, but also feel crap for leaving my wife to look after little'un. Can't ask her parents for help, as they both still work (though they'd probably come over anyway bless 'em).

P.S. Am giving myself 15 mins internet time by way of a break before I start work again.

YANBU - families should be there to support each other. An hours help isn't much to ask IMO. Its rubbish when you feel poorly. Lots of hot fluids, duvet, crap telly - hope you feel better soon...

You don't need to be hospitalised to need or ask for a bit of help... there are some seriously chippy and ungenerous people on here.

My point is your family should be there for you but they cannot always be I have raced round after my 3 kids while being poorly it's our job as mums but it makes it easier when family help

To SGM I think your a snob lol

i rest my case

SGM I think you are really mature and intelligent LOL

Eh? Why are you calling SGM a snob??
Really, we are getting a loer class of person on MN these days
You sound about 6

yes much "loer" class

most 6 year olds can spell "lower" I think.

I can just see the MN thread...

"AIBU to be fucked off with my friend?

I'm getting married next year, she's my bridesmaid and we had booked to go to the wedding show today. It's only on once a year and we both booked the day off work months ago. Now she's called up at the last minute and says she can't go because her sister has a cold. AIBU to think that's hardly an emergency?"

YANBU bit of a shame they didnt rally.

I had flu when dd was 6months. Proper in bed cant move, fever, flu flu. Never been ill like that before. DH had just had 2 weeks off work with the same thing so couldnt take any more time off. My parents were backpacking round India. In the end I rang my aunt and uncle my uncle drove over (1.5 hrs) realised how sick I was and took us both back to their house and they looked after dd for a few days until I was on my feet again. They are such stars.

Ah MM
Can you please explain why you told me to fuck off?

Ah husky i feel for you too. Im int he same sad position, family near by but none of them in the least bit interested or helpful. Funnily enough i babysat for all of them at the drop of a hat when i was young free and single.

I had 3 mcs in hospital and had to go through them all alone as i had no one to look after ds, dh had to stay home with him.

i have to admit feeling some what bitter about this and very very let down by them all.

Its difficult isnt it

i am sorry i think i will go and have a nap ooops cannot need to make dinners for kids and hubby and my 3 yr old will then be awake he has chickenpox at the min so will need cream on and then its off to work for me.MS i am not from any class but i love my family,my house is clean and my children are normal that makes me a good mum i could not care less about what class your in but when you bring that up i can indeed imagine you

wow what a reaction for sayin ya feel poorly:0(.Take no note of the super mums who can do everything an never have a bad day in there life.The only thing i can suggest is go to bed wiv babe and do nothing else until hubby comes back and just remember wen babe is grown up abit more and ur sisters have had babes no that u can just return the favour and have a good day out yourself!!! Had this situation myself and it ended up me having swineflu.hope u feel better and its at least bought a likkle smilexx

yabu, it's a cold, so what

MassiveMammaries: what you say doesn't address the substance of my post -- which was pining for the days when people (specifically family) helped each other out, precisely so that mums didn't have to pay for emergency childcare or look after the kids when they were feeling grotty.

These posts are making it clear to me why it's going to be so damned difficult to increase breastfeeding rates in this country -- people are so unwilling to give each other help, they even get cross when people ask for help.

SGM: What does unacceptable mean if not "immoral"? "Acceptable" is a judgement you are making. It's not utilitarian in this instance (ie you're not saying this is or is not a worthwhile practical tradeoff of cost v benefit) -- it is therefore a moral (or at least ethical) judgement. Acceptable is not a very close synonym for "reasonable".

shelbelle are you visiting form nethuns??

WTF???? fucking Breastfeeding??? are you off your empty head? that has precisely NOTHING to do with ANYTHING on this thread.

I suppose next you will attempt to draw a correlation between disposabl nappies and youth crime rates?