'expat - I can't help but feel that this is straying into rather dangerous territory. We are, as a nation, supposed to be - or at least moving towards being- a multi-cultural society. Many, many British people are also Asian/Latin American/Greek/other - are you saying that they should not keep their own traditions? Or that they may, but only in their 'own' country?'
Oh please! Don't try to turn this into some sort of quasi-racist means to sway your argument, that people who don't agree are racist.
Because Britain does have its own society as well, its own values and such.
And in its tradition it's not polite to put a statement in invites that you want money as gifts.
Your classic English wedding also tends to be very different in set up than in many other cultures, with the whole thing split up, the marriage in the morning or early afternoon, followed by some guests being invited to some sort of 'breakfast' and then the B-listers to an 'evening do'. Being Latina, I'd never heard of that before because most Latino ceremonies involve a Mass, at or near evening followed immediately by a reception and no such thing as some people invited to one thing and some to another.
Even though I'm of Mexican extraction, and over there mostly it's cash gifts, my American family has embraced the wedding gift list trend entirely. When in Rome and all that. It's a very multicultural society there.
It's a non sequitur that someone who finds it impolite to put money requests in an invite is racists and not multicultural.
But that's neither here nor there.
If you're Asian or Irish or what have you than everyone in your family already knows it's not boxed gifts. You don't need a tacky poem in a card.
And anytime you make it clear in an invite that you expect money as a gift and nothing else, then it's a demand.
I completely agree with TiredFeet.