I'm with expat all the way. It is just vulgar. Ok, so you have lived together and got a house full of toasters, why not say no gifts then? I lived with dh for a year before our registry office wedding. We put nothing but the invite in the envelope. Lots of people called asking what gift we would like. I said nothing, we need nothing. A lot wouldn't accept it, so I said charity. People called my parents asking and they said you can never have enough good white towels and sheets/duvets covers/white plates so I got loads of those and still love using them.
My wedding was a free bar from 3pm to 2 in the morning, a constant banquet of high quality chinese food, Karaoke, sit where you like, no cake and no tacky almonds in gauze.
It was exactly what I wanted, it cost 2grand and everyone who came made it special. I don't think inviting someone to an all day event and asking them to buy booze on top of outfits and travel is a great thing either. So we had a cheaper venue, no frills and managed to feed and water everyone. They loved it.
The expectation of a gift takes away the pleasure of giving it, and strikes me as a sense of entitlement.
Our honeymoon was a late deal to Greece on teletext, all inclusive, not fancy but all we could afford. We were in love and it was hot, what's not to like.
If you cannot afford a wedding or honeymoon, downgrade spending, don't expect guests to fund it. The weddings most people have already put guest to a lot of expense as it is.
If you are giving a dinner, the clue is in the word 'giving'.