no disiplin!!!???!!!???!!!!???!!!!

[natz23]

my 11 month old daughter gets watched by the mother in law 2 days a week while i work, she also takes her grandson who is 2 and a half,
i cant stand it any more that i may just give up work.
he is a little shite!! to be honest..
i have recently witnessed him throwing his toys at her when she is trying to play, snatching them off her, standing on her feet while she crawls, pushes her.. and so on.
my mother in law, and the boys mother, ina very calm tone say... no no thats not nice
which has no impact whats so ever, hes not listeneing, i want to pull him from her and give him a right good shouting at!! what is wrong with them!! or am i being out or order?
his mum has said to me.. aww hes only 2 he dosnt know!!
bullshit! because when he stands on her hands he looks about to see whos watching! and im sorry but if he dosnt know, im pretty sure he should by that age!! no means no!!!
im so worried about my little girl, she dosnt understand why he does it and just sits and crys! i witnesed this and not one of them even payed it any notice! i was livid!!!!!!!!what is the matter with them?

apart from that hes a lovely little boy but i am starting to dislike him more and more, and dont want olivia or myself around him.
do people not know whow to give disicplin to thier children anymore??? a smack to my arse whne i was young did me no harm, and i soon learnt my lesson!
he gets away with murder!

cant wait till shes older and she can hit him back!!!

just read the latest posts, for the term, wee shite it is commonly used here, our vocabulary uses a lot of words not meaning to be aggresive its just gave we talk in glasgow, so if it came across horrible im sorry, but his mum calls him a wee shit all the time, in a funny way!

its easy to say fork out money for a childminder.. i aint made a money! i dont get any govnerment help i work to pay her for taking my DD, and what i give her is all i can afford!

im not bothered anymore about the nastiness of some people, i am very surprised, at how mature adult woman... can act like a pack a wild dogs, nae skin of ma nose though.

anyways.. going to his mums tonight, just dropped my DD off at hers and he is sitting waiting for her with her toys, ...bless. he is lovely sometimes but he scares me when hes not lol.
going to speak to MIL tonight, hopefully get it sorted.

Natz- I got ya, I knew you were a Weegie (am from Edinburgh)!

I think you have taken the flak with great dignity!

Lol why thanking you.. not like me neither. ha ha. do you get where am comin from with the use of swearing when your from this neck a the woods.! it comes across differently when you write it. to call some one. anyone a wee shite is kind of acceptable lol. well here anyway.! x

Some people take things too seriously really. Its like the term gobshite for up north where my brothers hail from, well Yorkshire

Aye exactly. we use phrases like that all the time. i never thought anything of it at the time but obviously i've upset a lot of people. when clearly they have never called someone or a child probably a lot worse.! our slang involves a lot of swearing. im goin to need to watch my mouth when she is older lol. x

i like 'wee bugger' myself!

Aye he's more of a wee bugger. my partner uses the term wee bawheed!x

natz i really do take mt hat off to you, your spelling might be "shite" and you may come across as "young" but your responses to the bullying replies have shown you to have a lot of dignity and self respect. you haven't bitten back with nasty and very childish name calling. I, for one, totally applaud you!

i call my dh fannybawz quite often!

Thanks. no point biting back. not on here for a bitch fest. if people get a kick out of it then they can carry on. i hope when they need some advice they get called a plank right back. its my understanding that mm is for help and advice. clearly i was wrong. but thanks to those who have tried to understand where i was coming from. fannybaws love it. my other half just gets.. shut it ya sak lol x

1. People like myself who pick up on spelling mistakes do so when the OP is shocking/nasty.

AND spelling does matter. If it doesn't then why is every parent on MN obsessed with providing the very best education for their children? Because we want them to be received well as they grow up and make a success of themselves.

Plus pointing out bad spelling is surely less offensive than calling people who do so 'stuck up bitches' etc boring etc

1. Natz has admitted she's calmed down since her OP. But if a poster is going to call their dc a 'shite' and say they want his arse smacked then they have to expect to get some shocked or disgusted responses. Blimey, I posted about my dd being 'unlikeable' to other kids as she's in a bad phase and was flamed for that - rightly, as it was really badly phrased.

1. Calm yer boots ↲2. We need scottishmummy on this thread!

1. People like myself who pick up on spelling mistakes do so when the OP is shocking/nasty.

Why ?

to have a go,of course!

So will my child be rubbish at spellin because i am crap at using a keyboard. see when you try tying fast i always muck it up. goodness sake. goin on about my spellin is just daft! typing on a keyboard is different from using pen and paper. and we have already discussed how the term wee shite is used in glasgow. is everyone really offended by my spelling? don't know how i am goin to sleep tonight i really don't

wow high emotions. I've been through all sides to this with my boy and girl, and 'nephews'. Paying MIL obviously doesn't mean you will see eye to eye. IME nurseries deal with all issues very well, lot less tricky than causing family run ins, so worth their weight in gold. Worth more than giving up work, even if you don't earn much as a result.

I have come to this post quite late but I totally understand where you are coming from and am shocked by the amount of vitriol raining down on your head. Frankly anyone who wouldnt be upset about seeing an 11mo being hit/trodden on etc needs to take a look at themselves, not the other way around. It brings the lioness out in all of us! The behaviour you describe is normal for a 2 yr old who has not been told that to hurt others is wrong and heard the word 'no' enough. I have had a similar experience in the past - my daughter is quite retiring in the face of this sort of thing and would just take it which breaks my heart. She has an 8 yr old cousin who picks on her and so I have made it known that, when the family is all together, I dont want him sitting next to her or having much to do with her. This has made PIL alert to the problem. Have a word with your MIL in private or you may well have to change the arrangements. So sorry.

Gosh OP lots of unwarranted nastiness towards you.
Your opener was not the best but it was clear how upset you are, and I clearly remember the aannoyance I felt when neices and nephews bashed my DS.

Like others have siad he is only 2 but he does need to know that hitting is unacceptable, good luck and welcome to Mumsnet

PS I can spell but am shite at typing!

This Mumsnet obsession with spelling and grammar does my head in. DH is a post-graduate professional at a very senior post in his practice. His spelling is atrocious. Not because he's dim, but because his writing can't always keep up with the flow of his thoughts. When he's typing, it's worse! Every second word has letters jumbled up.

There's more to a person's intelligence than spelling

OP, I've come to this thread late but just wanted to say your first post reminded me of how I used to feel when dd was a baby. My best friend's son is 18 months older than her, and when she was crawling around, he used to push her around in a friendly way that used to make me see red! He just looked so big in front of her, and even a little hug from him used to send her sprawling. Thankfully I stopped myself from making it into an issue and tried to just defuse the situation. Now dd is 4 and the other boy is nearly 6 and they are the best of friends and play very well together

Maybe you should have called your post "AIBU to post on MN with poor spelling and acrylic nails?"

Sympathy Natz, you were just worried about your wee girl in the company of a toddler who wouldn't take no for an answer.
And yes here in Scotland the term "wee shite" is used frequently. Usually accompanied by gritted teeth rather than genuine venom, IMO.

Pixie sums it up, really, the behaviour is normal for a 2 yr old who hasn't been told enough that hitting/hurting others is wrong. My DD recently showed signs of hitting and was distracted and told no. I hope this continues to work, I am bracing myself for when it doesn't.

If someone posts a nasty thread then surely you respnd to the nastiness contained therein.
In my opinion retorting by saying 'look at your terrible spelling' is the same as saying 'and you smell' when involved in a playground spat around age 8.

If spelling is funny, if original posters is being vile in an 'I am more intelligent than everyone else', if spelling jibe is funny manner then it may be fair enough.

But often it is just a really really cheap shot. Pretty spiteful

I used to think a 2 year old did understand and could be disciplined into stopping something. Now I have one. I learned and so will you. Realise now that you are horribly wrong and this boy is just being 2, and your daughter will be the same 'little shite'

Good thing you weren't posting from Dublin in native Dublinese....

Wee shite is very benign to my ear.