To have an MN name which doesn't show that I'm a dad not a mum?

[Cleggy36]

I assume that most people's working assumption (if they think about it) would be that posters on MN are mums not dads. Sometimes I feel that it's slightly cheating to have a name which doesn't clarify things, so I always end up trying to make it clear in anything I post that my point of view is that of a 46 year old bloke not a 23 year old woman.

daftpunk
and having lunch dates with females is a bit drippy imo.

Every month I go out with 7-10 women I organise the monthly meal out for the local coffee group and am the only man (nothing dippy about that

oh
and I think you are a bit insecure

well a lot actually

7-10 isn't a problem, but would your wife/partner be ok with you going out with just 1 female friend?

Whyever not?

"Men & women can be friends, but I wouldn't want my dh going out with women socially without me, (and I know he'd feel the same about me with men)....nothing to do with trust"

It's everything to do with trust, surely? What else could it possibly be to do with?

I'm actually a bit hurt, daftpunk. What do you mean by 'a bit odd'? I'm unsure how to read that as unoffensive. Likewise for 'a bit drippy'. If a male friend meets me socially, suddenly he's drippy? ...Actually, what does 'drippy' even mean?

This men and women being friends thing confuses me. Presumably none of us can be trusted and will immediately jump into bed with each other even if we're not actually attracted to each other? What about my gay male friends, can I go out with them? My best friend is a lesbian, can I go out with her! I'm not a lesbian, but as I can't be trusted around my male friends who I have no sexual interest in, presumably I can't be trusted round her either!

Gosh it's all so confusing. Maybe I should just become a hermit.

Ryuk;

Ok, apologies first and foremost if I have hurt you in anyway by using the words 'odd' and 'drippy'

Let me explain:

Odd; well, I think it is a bit odd to want to go out with someone of the opposite sex if you are married or in a stable relationship.

Drippy; a man going on a ' lunch date' with anyone is drippy imo, .... what man goes on lunch dates apart from Laurence llewelyn Bowen...... come on.

Muser;

The reason a lot of women have gay male friends is because of the non- sexual element. Gay men are safe aren't they. you can have a good relationship with them knowing nothing will ever happen. Pressure off.

You should be burned at the stake!!

maybe change to daftpunkmale? if you want to that is..if not just say you are a dad

xx

Er......I'm female.

oooh lol sorry!

tiredness and all

i mean cleggy

sorry daftpunk xx

"you can have a good relationship with them knowing nothing will ever happen. Pressure off."

Pressure? You're weird.

I thought you said it wasn't about trust. Are you incapable of fighting those animal urges in the springtime...?

I manage to have male friends for whom I have no sexual urges whatsoever. Even good looking ones!

And dh is not drippy at all In fact, he is a former rugby player and now coaches rugby (even if it is just the Minis).

It is possible to be a "New Man" and help around the house and be in tune with your feelings :)

Has DaftPunk mellowed?

A year or so ago she was occupying the position of Zazen on this thread, leading the charge against men on mumsnet, saying completely bonkers things and sneering at the masculinity of any men here.

Now for most of this thread she's been fairly calm, saying "live and let live" and "if men want to come on mumsnet, who cares?"

Admittedly she's distrustful of men and women being friends and hanging out together, but, really, that's small fry.

Come on, say it ain't so! Reassure me that she's still the most nuts person on MN?

Daftpunk* - I am a heterosexual man and went on a lunch date with another heterosexual man recently. We went because we have been friends for years but do feel free to deconstruct and talk me through the undertow of swirling homoerotic tension in that if you wish.

Sorry I too am feeling as bemused and confused as BelfastBloke.

Actually I think daftpunk has mellowed. :)

It's the joy of mumsnet - opening people up to other opinions. You might notchange your onw, but at least you learn a bit about how other people think and maybe respect those differences a bit more. :)

I work with a male colleague who refers to them as lunch dates - I find that drippy.

Yet if he said I am meeting such and such for lunch - like most people do, I wouldn't even register the term.

Maybe for me it's the fact I find "lunch date" too girlie a a term/concept for me, I can't cope with big hairy men using it?

I certainly wouldn't meet DaftPunk for a lunch date, but I would have lunch with her iyswim?

But what about my lesbian friends daftpunk? Am I still allowed to go out with them? See there must be sexual tension there too. Which must mean lesbian women can't have female friends, and gay men can't have male friends. Which does seem awfully unfair to me. Imagine having to dump all your friends once you come out. As if it wasn't enough to deal with already.

If you're 100% straight then there's no problem having a lesbian as a friend. Only a problem if your're bi-sexual....and you fancy her.

I wouldn't have a problem with my dh having gay male friends, no worries at all.

Look, the more time you spend with someone you fancy the likelihood of something happening increases. Just because someones married doesn't mean they don't find other people attractive. I've been happily married for years, but when I walk into a pub my eyes automatically seek out the best looking male in there. I don't know why that happens? Maybe just nature..

I think maybe you like her? ( just read your other post)

I will point out or comment on good looking girls to dh and he will do the same for me for the hunky guys. We have a standing complaint when we go skiing that there are more ski bunnies than ski hunks. Hell, even I can appreciate a good looking woman.

Just 'cos you appreciate good/cute looks doesn't mean to say that you are want to shag the guy/gal.

I like window shopping - doesn't mean to say that I am going to buy - or steal - everying I see that I like.

My name implies astonishment at your lack of knowledge of the (or any) crunch, it demonstrates my innate need to assume things about others.

I assume you're all either truckers or teenage boys.

I used to do the Crunch. It stood me in good stead when I started Pilates :)