To let DD age 8 sleep in a tent by herself...

[TheMoistWorldOfSeptimusQuench]

... on a campsite, with me & partner in another tent right next to her, and surrounded by a load of other responsible adults and family friends?

Only asking because it hadn't occured to me that this was risky, but friend who is organising the trip has just expressed outright and horror at the idea.

DD loves the idea - she is already trying to work out what selection of sleeping bag, cushions & quilts she'll be able to cram in the car to make her nest.

My relationship is a new one (although we have known him for years & DD is very comfortable with him, very keen on him coming camping etc) so I'd really prefer to be sleeping with him - although I won't if you all think I'm being ridiculously negligent!

Am I?

Exactly cumbria81 fuss about nothing IMO.

Crikey, when I was 8 I used to go camping alone ! (with other kids anyways)

Times have changed it seems

not totally overwhelming before you, seeker: my suggestion of car repelling properties was not meant to be taken seriously...my understanding is that such properties are extremely rare

"I personally wouldnt,i remember the little girl in wales,who was taken from her tent hile she was sleeping,and he murdered her by the childrens swimming pool"

quite a few children have been murdered in their own houses: is that an argument against letting a child sleep in a house?

Sorry - missed you, cory. But I knew you'd be along soon!

Good point cory Wasnt a child once taken from a caravan window ??

Just what I was about to say cory.

My dd1 has had her own tent since she was 8. We pitch it so that it is behind our tent, so a car would have to run over us first before it got to her.

My dd2 has just gone a camp today at the local stables. Age9 they will be sleeping 2 to a tent. I have no concerns what so ever.

My concern it was is going to happen to this generation when they get to the age of 18 and are suddenly let off the leash with no real idea of how to handle the world.

Seeker - I've been a lone voice of reason for a while on this thread !

Quite a few posters on here need to read "Free Range Kids". I highly recommend it.

We are definitely at risk of raising a generation of children who have no idea how to look after themselves by the time they get to 18; that's much more risky behaviour than anything the OP is proposing here IMO.

Just found this thread... WOW!!!! I am shocked by some reactions!!!!

Original plan sounds very good to me!

This World is a wonderful place and much is to be enoyed about living if you are confident enough to enjoy it!

YES, I know... Bad things do sadly happen.

BUT... The best 'protection' from bad things you can give any child is to provide children with the means to understand dangers, nurture a sense of responsibility for themselves and others, scaffold development with enough experiences in life to be self assured in what they do and allow them to experience making decisions.

IMHO - Giving her this experience, especially as she is really up for it; will actually make her overall more safe in life and more able to deal with whatever life throws at her in various situations.

It was a good idea of yours! Please do stick to it!!!!

Sounds fine to me, I would put the openings of the tent close together (i.e. on the diagonal or facing each other) and then sleep with my head near the door.

Well I would if I ever went camping, which I don't because I bloody hate it.

Well thanks for all the comments. I have to say I'm not usually of the paranoid parenting school - DD is very sensible, and as others have said, I believe in letting her have her adventures and promoting her independence. I know for sure that she wouldn't wander off in the night, sleep walk, or take any other risk. She'll be quite happy tucked up in her little nest, playing with her torch and listening to the birds. So the dangers are external. And I'm still not convinced that people wander around campsites looking for children to abduct - any more than they wander around quiet residential streets or hotels.

I'm completely on the fence now.

But, I'll say it again: she is the priority and I'm not putting my sex life over her safety, as some seem to have extrapolated

I think there is no hard and fast answer here OP. Is just a judgement call based on your personal situation.

Sex life and tent.
Surely no-one could accuse you of prioritising sex in a tent.
Only if they've never camped before.

For what it's worth Moist, I began with the "Oh no! Save the DD" attitude and I think everyone else has convinced me otherwise. (As I said before my DD's are a bit younger and not at an appropriate age). But I think they're right. I think you should do it.

I'd go with the suggestion of bells on the (inside) of the tents zipper (just as a precaution), but I think there really is no reason not to.

Obviously with caveats like letting you know if she needs the loo etc.

I don't think you're being unreasonable but I personally wouldn't do it.

I used to camp lots, mainly abroad, with my father when I was a child - always in a separate tent but I wouldn't feel comfortable doing that with my own DS.

We're planning a camping trip once our (soon-to-be) newborn is old enough and we'll be using a big tent with separate compartments.

I'd probably feel OK about it if there were two children together - can you find a friend or family member to tent-share with your DD?

We have a two bedroomed tent with "the kitchen"/wardrobe between the two rooms. I do not think OP's plan are so different TBH. I like the idea of bells on the zip on the children side though.(would never have thought of it).

Bells work. Have always put them on my tent at festivals and the like.

Oops. Mine has been sleeping out in the back garden for the past week.

We did let her have a tent to do it in.

However - don't even think of having sex in a tent wth other people outside - however silently you do it. There is nothing more embarrassing than furtive rustles and sqeaks emerging from a tent, then two tousled people being late for breakfast with"thet" look on their faces!

Come back to the tent in the afternoon if you must, or wait til everyone's asleep in the evening but for the love of God don't do the lie in thing!

I really don't see the problem with letting her have her own tent. She's a sensible 8 year old, and she'll be right next to your tent. Do establish an electric forcefield around her tent though so she can't be savaged by rampaging grizzly bears.

I think this thread needs a "trigger" warning, now I am thinking about camping and it is traumatising me.

Yes

Like the bells idea

You should definitely let her sleep in own tent.
You are right next to her so if you whisper Im sure she will hear it, let alone speak normally. You are also camping with a bunch of friends who will also be incredibly close.
Don't shelter your poor daughter to the length some of the crazed MN ladies would. Better to help create a strong independent young woman

morloth...step away from the thread ! Quickly !

Tanso, I am not crazed, I can assure you

I think the people talking about selfishness are though

Different parenting styles, innit

However, the Op seems OK with the polarised opinion on this thread, so I do think piling in to pour scorn on women who would be a bit more cautious (but would not judge OP if she went right ahead with her original plan) is a bit off, tbh