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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think she's a bridezilla??

221 replies

bridesmaidzilla · 13/07/2010 21:22

My friend is getting married in December and decided to book her bridemaids dresses fitting on my wedding anniversery (tomorrow) - I mentioned this when she told me 3 months ago and she said I know but it will only be for about 2/3 hours.

Anyway, 2 months ago she informed me we had to purchase our own shoes but she didn't want me to have too high a heel!!

I have arranged for a friend to have my dc's tomorrow - my dc's know her well as she's my closest friend - friend is willing to have dc's as long as needed.

Bride has rang me tonight to say she'll pick me up at 9am (changed from 10am) and I said I'd drive in case any problems etc I can leave if needs be. I cannot go before 9.30am as dc's have swimming lessons - and I've said I'll drive to meet her and others at the bride shop. When I asked her how long she thought we'd be (as friend has dc's, I have optitions at 4pm, and DH is home early so we can have takeout for anniversery).

She was extremly 'off' with me stating that there was no time limit she'd set and she wanted me to have a day without worrying about my dc's (she doesn't have dc's) and after bride shop visit to go into the city about 30 mins away and buy the shoes.

I said that I didn't expect to be buying the shoes tomorrow and that as I am going on holiday in 2 weeks do not have the money. Also have had unexpected bills this month e.g car broke down and now problems with my glasses hence opitions appointment which I've had yo get them to squeeze in (work weekdays)

I suggested that if she wanted us all to wear the same shoes she bought them (don't wanna pay more than £50) and I pay her back next month. She has refused this.

She was extremly rude to me about the optitions appointment and I explained it's the only one they have this week that I can attend and need new glasses sorted asap (can't see without them) and it takes 7-10 days for them to be made and need them before I go away - and she had said originally 10am for a FEW hours.

So AIBU or is she being a bridezilla and WWYD???

OP posts:
Bogeyface · 31/07/2013 22:50

ZOMBIE THREAD ALERT!!!!

Resurrecting this because it has been said on another thread that BZ got worse and the OP didnt even go to the wedding as a guest. I NEED TO KNOW WHAT SHE DID! :o

Cerisier · 01/08/2013 01:30

me too Bogey, is the OP still out there somewhere?

notanyanymore · 01/08/2013 01:36

What is the norm with bridesmaids? Is it that theybprovide the dress and you sort out everything else? And if your doing the finishing touches (everything but dress) for 2 bridesmaids are you supposed to get all matching? (but there are other bridesmaids who will have had shoes etc provided by someone in another country), or not worry too much as if they were worried they'd have provided you with some stipulations on what you should provide?

notanyanymore · 01/08/2013 01:38

I'm not sure what I just wrote made any kind of sense! Maybe I should just start my own thread as only a few days to go and worrying I'm going to screw this one up!

mynameismskane · 01/08/2013 08:16

What happened next?!

SarahAndFuck · 01/08/2013 19:32

On the other thread, the friend of this OP said that this happened:

^"BZ was a friend of a friend . She didn't get another bridesmaid just had the others.

Friend thought all was OK and text her wishing her a good day on the morning and next day to say wish she'd had a good time. Apparently BZ went all Godzilla and asked why she cared etc.

They do not speak now I wonder why?!"^

So basically, this OP send a couple of nice texts to the bride and got abuse in return. I'm actually shocked anyone thought she was unreasonable at the time.

She was asked to go dress shopping on a day she said wasn't convenient, gave in to pressure from the bride when told it would take a couple of hours, was then told it was the entire day, was expected to pay money she didn't have at the time to buy shoes, was told her children were an inconvenience to the bride and the OP should put the bride before them, copped a lot of abuse from the bride and then copped a lot more on here for daring to book a holiday and take her children to a swimming lesson on one of the bride's many, many special snowflake days.

I'm not surprised they are no longer speaking either. This OP has probably had the most peaceful three years of her life since then.

I think I am now stuck in a spiral of reading MN zombie bride threads. Each one leads to another, even worse one than before! Someone may need to help me get out Grin

pianodoodle · 01/08/2013 20:10

Have only read the OP so far.

YANBU

She didn't specify the whole day.

I really don't know what it is with these people. You get to be the "bride" on your wedding day some women seem to want to be the girl in the big picture for half a fucking year beforehand?!

You'd still be there to try on stupid dresses what more does she want a parade?

FryOneFatManic · 01/08/2013 20:14

Which is the other thread?

pianodoodle · 01/08/2013 20:18

Oh just realised this is an older thread. Will go back and catch up...

digerd · 01/08/2013 20:33

Thank goodness I married in Germany !

SarahAndFuck · 01/08/2013 21:07

The other thread was this one but it's about a different bridezilla and this thread got a mention.

pianodoodle · 01/08/2013 21:10

Don't a lot of American weddings have rehearsals and rehearsal dinners as well?

Rehearsal dinners?! The greedy fuckers...

Cheeseandwin5 · 29/07/2019 15:41

I can see it from the Brides view like a few others.
She is getting married and wants those who she has asked to take special positions to be part of it. Maybe she should have told you earlier, but you didn't specify either and she is under pressure too.
All the excuses you have given are not reasons as all can be changed without too much hassle, but you are unwilling to put yourself out. Instead of getting a bee in your bonnet, why dont you bow out gracefully as a bridesmaid and save the stress for everyone.

Caramellow · 29/07/2019 15:43

The thread is nine years old!

Namechangedonceagain · 29/07/2019 16:22

I think proudnsad is your friend OP.

I can't think of any other reason why she'd be saying YABU when you're SO clearly not!

Your friend is a bridezilla.

Namechangedonceagain · 29/07/2019 16:22

Oops! Should really start RTFT

SuzieQQQ · 29/07/2019 16:37

She is definitely a bridezilla. It’s JUST a wedding. She’s moved the goal posts and now she’s grumpy. She’s being very unreasonable

jackernanna · 29/07/2019 16:53

She was/was not being unreasonable NINE YEARS AGO FFS

DitheringBlidiot · 29/07/2019 19:50

I have to assume that people who are saying to make an opticians appointment for a different time don’t wear glasses or have contacts to fall back on.

DitheringBlidiot · 29/07/2019 19:50

Ignore me 😂😂

Sparklesocks · 29/07/2019 19:51

I’m sure she’s over it now Grin

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