Support thread for those trying to lead an alcohol free life - Autumn 25

[Lavrander]

Hello and welcome!

This thread is for anyone who is genuinely trying to live an alcohol-free life. It was first set up by @drybird and has grown into a safe, supportive space to share thoughts, ask advice, swap experiences, or simply check in as we give up and keep off the booze.

There’s no judgment here – just kindness and encouragement. Whether you post every day, once in a while, or just read along quietly, you’re part of the group. Many of us have found this thread invaluable, whether brand new to abstaining or years into AF life.

Wherever you are on the journey, someone here will have been there too. Don’t be shy about posting – we love celebrating successes of all shapes and sizes, and we’ll support you through the tougher times as well.

The only thing we ask is that your aim is complete abstinence. If your goal is moderation, there’s an a long-running thread for that in this board that will be a better fit for you. That doesn't mean that slips don't happen, and we'll support you in picking yourself back up and carrying on, cheering you on as you do.

Living alcohol-free isn’t always easy in today’s world, but it is absolutely worth it. And you don’t have to do it alone – we’re here to help each other realise just how good AF life can be.

@REP22 Oh lord yes I was not being at all serious! I've just done 4 years working with the acute elderly anyway so never EVER again.

Applied for a couple more positions, one in the MIU and the others a doctors surgery (yawn). But needs must.

Just got back from my daughter's six form open evening, she goes into year 12 next year so GCSE's coming up soon. It was a lovely evening and my pride for her is indescribable quite honestly. I must keep trying really hard at this, especially the next few days.

I had a meeting also earlier with my alcohol support worker and have made a plan to attend this Monday's SMART meeting in person and also seeing the nurse prescriber in a few weeks about this medication. I think getting back to a physical group meeting will be really positive, I am becoming antisocial and weird again... hiding in my home/cave

Today is my day 1.
Been reading for a while & know I have to stop, today is the day. On holiday and yesterday had several pints throughout the day, wasn’t anywhere near drunk, bought some to take home to have with a takeaway. Got back and literally thought I was going to die, intense headache & every internal organ hurt, needed to vomit but couldn’t, was in too much pain to sleep. Feel better than last night now but not ‘well’ by any stretch. Still have the drink in the fridge that I bought yesterday and fear I’ll drink it tonight, hence this post.

Welcome @TwoNicePuppies you are in good company here.

Can you pour the booze away? Can you prepare with something else to drink tonight, plan your evening - even if it is a film/series you want to watch if feeling unwell? X

Thank you @Womanshour I love the way you support each other here. I can definitely get rid of it when I drag myself out of bed, it’s torrential raining here so I’m not planning on going out (or even taking off my PJs!!) today but hubby usually has some fancy AF drinks so maybe I’ll share them. Just craving water atm, think my body is telling me something!

I would when you can, takes the nagging thought away that it is there!

Sleep and get well. Its not for everyone but quit lit really helped me in the early days. Audio booked about other people managing to stop drinking or podcasts (sober dave, sober powered).

Keep posting x

I've not posted for a while but still reading the thread. Good to see so many new faces! There's been some talk lately of identifying triggers. I.ve realized one of mine is being very happy. I went to a live music event recently and it was brilliant. I came home buzzing and would have gladly had a large glass of wine to help me wind down before bed. Instead, I tried a can of Brewdog Wingman. Have to say it was bitterly disappointing! Looked like weak piss and had hardly any flavour (which may well have been a good thing!) Luckily, the accompanying cheese and crackers went down well and I slept soundly. Next time I'll be prepared with a better AF option in the house.

I keep wine in the house for visitors, and my husband still drinks. I used to find that had ingredients wine there meant that I was choosing not to drink, so less anxious than if I had no alternative. Now, I'm not so sure.

Has anyone tried Soberistas? I signed up for their 100 day challenge the other day. That will take me to the end of February, so will cover the Christmas period. By Christmas I should be well into it, and sadly I do need a reset. I already have liver damage, and my recent dabbling with 'moderation' has, predictably, threatened to descend into a return to my old ways, so the only way forward is abstinence. I feel unwell, and am hoping that I haven't made the liver damage irreversible. I am so cross with myself - after 8 years, I could have ruined things. What is wrong with me? (I'm absolutely not looking for sympathy, BTW. There is no excuse, and I am 100% responsible for my stupid actions.

Anyway, I'm not sure how to get the best out of Soberistas, so any tips would be useful, please.

@TwoNicePuppies welcome. I joined here in similar circumstances, was getting very dizzy, feeling sick, heart palpitations.
Definitely pour the booze away. Order yourself some B1 vitamins online. Check in here.
Id also say book yourself a doctors appointment, I can bet you 100% they don’t really ask about alcohol consumption so you don’t have to talk about that/admit it you’ve been drinking too much if you don’t want to. At least then they will Check your blood pressure, do blood tests etc. it was the push I needed to really make a change, after years of the Monday merry go round of I’m never drinking again to be back drinking a bottle of wine on a Tuesday night. That my blood pressure was through the roof, I was just in the obese category now I’m thankfully just overweight, and I feel 10 times better!

Thanks @FiloPasty I have some 100mg B1 from my last attempt in Sept, do I only need the 1 per day? I go for the contraceptive injection every 12 weeks so get my BP and weight checked each time & they’ve always been normal, I’ll maybe request blood tests next time I’m there. I’ve pretty much drank every day for 30 years, sometimes 1 glass of wine, sometimes 20 units in a day, I VERY rarely get drunk such is my tolerance. Only my husband and mum know, I think they are both enablers (not blaming them, they buy it, I choose to pour it down my neck!)

I’d mention the headaches and just feeling unwell, hopefully they’ll investigate further. Good luck x

You really need more than 100g of B1 if you have just stopped drinking. I would take one three times a day. I am taking one 500mg one (Solgar) a day just now, and will drop to 100g or so as a maintenance dose after 6-8 weeks.

It is vital that all newbies take Thiamine. It can help to stop alcohol-related brain damage. A GP will prescribe it, or you can buy it easily OTC or online.

Forgot to say - you can't overdose on B1. You will excrete what you don't absorb. It makes your wee a worrying shade of luminous yellow/orange, so don't be alarmed. I am also drinking beetroot juice, which supposedly helps to cleanse the liver, and it dyes everything purple, so my bathroom visits are nothing short of terrifying😉.

Purple is the colour of royalty @ShyMaryEllen - and I suppose it is on a throne of sorts, so.... Arise Queen ShyMaryEllen (after wiping, of course). 👑

Strength and courage to all friends, old and new. We can make it. It will be alright. xx

I am here shipmates.
We had another bereavement on Tuesday.
Yesterday was my wedding anniversary and due to the above it was subdued.

Oh, lovely @WendyWagon - I am so, so sorry. I wish I had words that could make it better, but I know that none really help at all. Sending you much love. All my thoughts are with you. xx

@WendyWagon so sorry lovely

@ShyMaryEllen ive not seen Soberistas just ticking along with my Try Dry and checking in here. Do you recommend?

i’m really itching today for a drink, bad weather, I’ve been super busy all day and I’m out of 0% drinks, I might have to make a supermarket run weird that now it’s for the 0% but I know my pretend beer or cider will scratch the itch.

I will soldier on, sobriety will prevale :)

It's early days, @FiloPasty, so I don't know. The gist seems to be that you join a 100 day challenge, and are allocated a 'team' who are all doing it, and support one another through it. Having a team means you can get to know the others better than if everyone posted in the same place. There are blogs and articles, which I think are written by members. It costs to subscribe after a 7 day trial period, and I used mine up 11 years ago, so had to pay. I don't know more than that, so was asking the shipmates if I'm missing anything. The people are nice, but as we have the shipmates and Sid here, I'm not sure of the added value.

So sorry to hear your news, @WendyWagon.

@WendyWagon

I am so sorry to read you have had a bervement. Thinking of you, we are all here for you 🤍

Evening. A very difficult workday today. Was expected but my default after a tough day is to drown my sorrows. But not today folks!
Cup of decaf tea, pjs on, crappy tv. Pop onto this thread. Day 11. Ticking it off.
thank you to everyone who has taken time to post advice and those with established sobriety continuing to support us returning wanderers and newbie's.
An interesting development are my dreams. I never dream and the last few nights they are vivid. The synapses must be firing up again o guess?!

@WendyWagon so sorry for your loss.

day 20 in the bag.
last few days have been relatively easy. No wine witch in my head at all. Long may it continue?!!!

Hi all

@WendyWagonI'm so so sorry for your loss.

hello @LillyPJI'm glad to see you post. Hope this doesn't come across as weird but I was actually only wondering yesterday if I should tag you as I hadn't seen you pop up in a while. Noted on the brew dogs.. I must start preparing for Christmas - celebration times are definitely dangerous.

Welcome @TwoNicePuppies- how has today and this evening been? You've had a short sharp shock - try to remember that feeling when you're tempted; it will help.

@ShyMaryEllenI've not tried Soberistas. Worth a try but are you just paying for a forum or alternative AA? Sending support to you. I know you're annoyed and not looking for sympathy but you are here and you've reset. What was it that made you dabble after 8 years? Just time?

Well done on getting through a tough day @Carpetburn! I think there might be a tough day mission you can get on the TryDry app. Collect that badge 😉

Sending whoops and cheers for everyone else getting through the day sober no matter what.

@Lavrander It's nice to know I'm not forgotten! I haven't posted much here because not much new has happened - which is a good thing. My AF routine is pretty dull. I don't always notice it's 6 pm now and sometimes even when I do, I don't always bother to pour a drink at all. With Christmas coming up though, booze is starting to be on my brain and I'll have to buy a few bottles for guests. It could be a big test for me.

Very early good morning from me and the dog.

I've been putting the light out before ten and I had a nice clean bed, bliss.

The DS finally got his house! The one he wanted came back to the market yesterday. Mother told him it would. Spidery senses and all that. They took his offer so the challenge is on to get it surveyed quickly so the GF doesn't have to renew her lease in London.

I had a cheeky potential client expecting me to trot into London today having not sent any samples or documents. At £100 a rail ticket I don't think so! I'd rather stuff envelopes (not that anyone does anymore).

Off to hospital again tomorrow re my ticker. Ho hum. I have been playing Dr Google but nowt I can do until they do the big scans.
One plus point it's blinking scared me. Long term alcohol dependancy can cause heart problems. I was also a big girl for twenty years. We'll see my friends.

I do miss the Marks ready mixed G and T AF. I liked the ones with the green lady illustration. The new ones are not the same.
Have a good Friday all.

@WendyWagon

Morning. We are twinning this morning with our early wakings. Woke abput half an hour ago, but was asleep by about 8pm. Thats exciting news about your son's house, you must be so happy and relieved for him too.

Dr Google is a rabbit hole for sure. It is pretty useful on one hand but also has convinced me I had Pluracy once when I clearly didn't!.

When is the scan happening?

Is it tomorrow at your hospital appointment?