The Continuing Support Thread for Anyone Trying to Lead an Alcohol-Free Life Autumn 2024

[REP22]

Hello and welcome. I’m glad you’ve found your way here. We are a bunch of people who are trying to give up and keep off alcohol. No judgement, just honest support and kindness.
The original thread was started by @Drybird2020 in 2020 and we have plenty of veterans and newer members who can offer advice and signposting. You are welcome here, whether you post several times a day, once or twice and then never again, or if you only just come to read but have no intention of ever posting.
Whatever your stage on the AF journey, and whatever you’re going through, someone here will have gone through it too. Don’t be shy about posting, we love to celebrate your successes of whatever shape and size - and will support you when things get challenging. We get it, we've been there too.

All we ask is that you’re genuinely trying to abstain. We don't encourage moderation-only here, as it can be triggering for some to read. If you’re looking to moderate your drinking rather than quitting it altogether then MN has another long-running and very active moderation/abstaining thread that’s always near the top on the alcohol support board. Lots of fine support there from those worthy people too.

I started trying to give up drink in 2018, succeeded (mostly) in 2019 but had a few “wobbles”, one of which led me here in April 2023, where @WendyWagon (our most recent ship’s captain) and the others made me feel so welcome. This thread and its wonderful posters has been a lifesaver to many, and have certainly seen me through many good and not-so-good days.

These books were particularly helpful to me and I still go back to them from time to time: The Sober Diaries by Clare Pooley (Amazon - Sober Diaries) and The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober by Catherine Gray (Amazon - Unexpected Joy). Others have found This Naked Mind by Annie Grace (Amazon - This Naked Mind) helpful. There are Apps that help track your AF journey, including Reframe and the one I use, I Am Sober. Podcasts can also be helpful. I have found One for the Road by Sober Dave to be a good listen. But different things work for different people. Feel free to post and ask. There is solidarity, wisdom and support here. This is a safe space where your voice will be heard, understood and valued.

@EastCoastDamsel i went onto one of the feminist boards. As a feminist I should be happy there but it's not for the sensitive of mind!

Morning everyone,

Day 5 for me today and I am taking my teenagers into the city. Something I have promised to do many times, but usually can't face in the morning. It's these little things that make me move forward at the moment.
Other end of the spectrum was an anxiety attack and it having to venture into a store and do shopping, but I made it out without booze, so was proud of that.
Wishing you all a happy Saturday.

We loved Beetjejuice @EastCoastDamsel , I hope you enjoyed it!

morning all. on the mend here finally. glad booze hadn't also been in the mix. previously i would drink through pretty much most illnesses and use the excuse it would relax me/ help me sleep/ kill germs/ somehow be medicinal. what a load of shit!

well done on day 5 @RunningtheHill early days are hard but the gains can be huge as you say, waking up with a clear head and being present for family is the number one benefit - esp if you have teenagers ( like me) - it's not too late to spend quality time with them and to model getting sober. mine don't say it much but i can see that they are pleased with my non drinking and feel more secure with me. you can also drive them places late at night!!!

sorry about your panic attack though. remember that booze ultimately makes anxiety worse and not better.... my anxiety has reduced significantly with sobriety

sorry about your MN lashing @WendyWagon you don't serve that. i rarely go on any threads altho i've been on here for 15 years or so ( one name change ten years ago or so can't remember why). addiction threads are generally the only place you can avoid bitchy shit, and SEN threads so they are pretty much what i've used, plus the odd dilemma about parenting or health that i've wanted a view on but i don't really do that any more as i think MN has lost its non judgemental supportive feminist culture. shame.

Afternoon all. Day 150 for me today. Woo Hoo! For some reason that feels like a big one… it’s getting on for almost half a year.

It’s sunny here - not always guaranteed in the Yorkshire Dales - so I have had a very satisfying morning in the garden tidying up the vegetable plots, planting winter seeds and harvesting what’s left. (What to do with 2.5 kg of mostly green tomatoes 🤷🏻‍♀️). I’ve been reflecting that I have so much more time these days. I wasted huge amounts of time feeling blah. I also now have more energy to do things in it. Which at the moment seems to be slowly turning into my mother, who’s a keen gardener.

Have a lovely weekend all. Keep on keeping on x

Thanks @ponzusoup
I'm so pleased things are improving for you.

congrats @SeasideRock that's awesome.

i'm 153 days today - who knew it was even possible !!

waving to @REP22 in dartmoor. hope youre surviving your mother! am sure sid is helping. sending love x

@EastCoastDamsel hope theme park was fun! go you, trying new AF experiences - great stuff 💜🎈

@ponzusoup - I know - right?!! Would have been unthinkable to me until very recently. Well done on 153. It feels to me like to good stuff is really starting to kick in now

we rock @SeasideRock no pun intended.

maybe the benefits of our hard work continue to be reaped - i crawled onto here not even thinking that 24 hours would be possible.

we're all ace beyond measure given all the other crap and duty in our lives xxx

may. not maybe 🥴

So inspiring! I'm 3 days, YESSS! 🥳🥳

@BoneTiredandWired believe it or not you can absolutely do it one day then one week then one month at a time. gets easier, promise.

anyone else tried mother root as a. AF alternative? ginger apple cider vinegar chilli in a spirit sized dose topped up with sparkling water and ice. really delish!

Great work @BoneTiredandWired and @RunningtheHill !

Incredible @SeasideRock and @ponzusoup ..

The theme park was fun. I managed 3 rides (with DD). Might have done more if she was keener but 3 was incredible for her . DH and DS had a ball doing the scariest one 3 times!

@ponzusoup , I had bottle of motherroot and loved it but now make my own using Willy's Turmeric Apple cider vinegar, fresh ginger and a squeeze of honey. (Much cheaper, but not quite as delicious)

well done on the rides @EastCoastDamsel and very enterprising on the diy mother root - very impressed. 🔥🔥

I’m impressed @EastCoastDamsel ! I must try that. Have you tried Botivo? It was a bit of a revelation to me …

I pad keeps logging me out and couldn’t be bothered to sort but now back in
roll on October

Morning all.
Up for tea and a shortbread biscuit.
Just me and the dog.
The DH is returning to work tomorrow. I might get a lay in!
The DD is as pleased as punch re her student finance (they cocked it up last year) and a forthcoming job interview. She is quite low maintaince, however her vinyl collection is growing.
The DS is off for a house viewing tomorrow. The house hasn't been sold since 1999 so he might get a chance as it needs work. He hopes to move by the spring.

I'm seeking a new outfit for a wedding in November. Usually I'd be cock a hoop but it's proving tricky. I don't want a silk frock because I can't wear it again unless I go to the races. It's a mighty posh do with champagne all the way so I will be taking my Gordon's AF. I don't want to be the entertainment.
Its nippy here but bright. Eyes down for a good day my friends.

Morning
Hope everyone is well
Apologies I haven't read every post but I wondered if anyone has tried using the Clear minds hypnotherapy course? Reviews are positive on the whole but it's always better to have real life recommendations or otherwise
Thanks in advance

@Iamateadrinker good morning.
I haven't used hypnotherapy. It's very hard to put me under. I tried it for weight years ago.
I had therapy for six months and it was life changing.
Someone will be along shortly to advise.

Morning all.

Listening to this at the moment . to Eat to Change How You Drink: Heal Your Gut, Mend Your Mind and Improve Nutrition to Change Your Relationship with Alcohol amzn.eu/d/29xGrDC How to eat to change how you drink

Only just in but the introduction really describes me.

I love reading everyone's updates about what day they're on now. Regardless of how high or low the number, I find it so encouraging.

I'm on day 37 and suddenly having a little burst of positivity and hope. Before i'd been feeling a bit rotten and fed up and lonely without alcohol! But now, aches and pains that I'd not realised were connected to drinking have subsided - I've been waking up feeling positively sprightly! - and I'm finally starting to naturally treat myself to things that aren't alcoholic.

Before, I was really struggling to find joy or motivation to even TRY and consume anything that wasn't alcoholic. Like, why buy a nice drink to relax with in the evening if there's no booze in it? But it's just occured to me today that this mindset has gone, and I'm enjoying treating myself to non-alcoholic things now.

Most of all, I am DOING HARD THINGS. This has become my motto: Do the hard thing! I usually just drink and bury my head in the sand when I have a problem or something I need to do. I put it off until later, later, later. Not recently. And doing hard things makes me feel great. Well - not at the time, admittedly. But the sense of achievement from actually doing the things I'd usually put off, and waking up thinking "I did that!" and feeling all relieved and pleased with myself, instead of waking up with a hangover and a huge list of stuff to do, is a great feeling.

Hope you're all having a lovely weekend!

@Katielovesteatime i agree wholeheartedly. I always put off the hard things, buried letters, avoided telephone calls. I now try to clear my mind.
I also do a lot of 'let it go'.

, l read an old thread of mine today from four years ago. It was enlightening. I can't link it as it's too outing about a family member but wow, I've come a long way.