New April continuing thread for living an alcohol free life - all welcome

[livingalivelife]

Hello! This is the continuation of a thread started originally by drybird, and subsequently continued by many fabulous and now sober mumsnetters. It's provides huge amounts of non-judgmental support, cameraderie and good humour to anyone venturing on an alcohol free life.

I've been on the thread several times, lapsed and been welcomed back, which I have hugely appreciated. This time I am determined to stay AF and I'm now on day 44. There is so much experience here on offer - how to get through that first sober Friday night, family party, night out, festive celebration, work do etc etc. And also loads of info on great resources to help in the AF journey - podcasts, books, websites, different kinds of support groups and counselling, or going it alone - the emphasis is on whatever works for you.

This is a thread for those who are living alcohol free, and if you're looking to cut down (lucky you if you're one of those people can have one glass of wine and not think - what's the point of that?), there are other great threads elsewhere in the alcohol topic for moderate drinking.

Looking forward to more clearheaded, shamefree mornings and sober adventures ahead ...

Morning all,

I'm loving the lavender chat and hope the dog gets his new hat to wear!

Hot hot hot already here. I had a sit in the garden after work last night with a glass of Nosecco. Would have been a bottle of Prosecco (minimum) 2 months ago 😇

Think I'm coming up to day 63. Struggling to keep track which feels like it could be a good thing.

Hope everyone has a great day.

Morning Day 25

I have an absolutely horrible stomach bug (explains the bloating and low energy running yesterday). 🤢🤢🤢

Feel miserable. Horrific stomach cramps

Oh no @eastcoastdamsel! Sorry to hear that. Stomach bugs are horrible

@NextPhaseOfLife Nosecco in the garden sounds very seasonal! I saw a thing where they make big ice cubes in rose shaped moulds with cranberry juice or pomegranate juice or something and then top it with prosecco. Thought about trying it some day with Nosecco!

Day 47 here

Sorry to hear that, @EastCoastDamsel

Hope you feel better soon xx

@BigFatSoberLife might have to try those. I'm waiting for a non-alcoholic Aperol-type thing to arrive - maybe I'll make ice cubes from that 🤩

Morning all.
I am feeling a bit better. I came down with a stomach bug yesterday. I had just eaten the big breakfast and I thought cripes I feel poorly. Home ASAP, no farm shop shopping. Nobody wanted the doggy bag!

I'm not good in the heat. Nore is the DH and his genetics aren't English. We both hide and he shuts all the blinds.
I'm quite lucky in that I don't even think about booze when I'm hot.
@NextPhaseOfLife i just remember my start date these days.

I have a lemon and rosemary AF gin to try. I'll let you know what it's like.

Good morning all. So sorry to hear about the stomach bugs - I hope they mend well soon. Grim at any time, but in this heat... 😟

Was a struggle for me last evening, but I remain sober and grateful for it.

Have a good day and stay safe in the heat. xx

Well done on staying strong @rep22 💪

Sorry to hear you're suffering too @wendywagon! Horrible tummy bugs 😒. Aren't they supposed to be gone by now?

@BigFatSoberLife i think mine was caused by meds on an empty stomach.
One thing I can tell you if you don't drink you lose your 'wine waist'. I have quite the pronounced shape. I was like a barrel. And I'm the wrong side of 50!

Very hot here. I'm looking forward to chicken noodle stir fry. Gordon's af cans.

I want to loose my wine waste @WendyWagon !! Why won't it start to go!!! (Don't worry I'm not expecting any answers I know it'll take time).

Well done @REP22 it's so hard some days isn't it x

sorry to hear about ladies with tummy bugs ... double whammy in this heat. am having an old jamaican ginger beer with ice and lime. delicious. went out for dinner with boozy work mates last night by the river. they were drinking frozen margaritas ... and i am proud to say i managed to resist and had 2 cold lucky saint beers. found that the conversation was much more lucid on my part. made me think that when i drink in company i must've been so much less attentive and interested in people.

onward and upward all. i think im 60 days sober today and am thinking about clare pooleys experience of that being a tricky time...

@ponzusoup you're doing great.
I love ginger beer. Must be all my Enid Blyton books as a kid!

I used to talk utter nonsense after the first three glasses. I'm still living it down. My friend's husband nearly fell off his chair last week when I said something about not drinking for over two years. He actually spoke to me with genuine intetest. It was kinda nice.

@REP22 i find your dog pics are balm for the soul. i'm so sorry you're on more antibiotics 🫤

@WendyWagon thanks for new thread offer. we'd be lost without you.

Morning all

Day 26!

Feeling better and brighter today. Still slight headache but that could just be that I am hungry. Going to get up today. Hopefully a good breakfast will perk me right up.

Morning!

Glad you're on the mend @eastcoastdamsel ! Hope you are too @WendyWagon

@rep22 I didn't realise that photo was your real dog! How cute! I thought it was from google images. He is very regal 😌👑

Day 48 here! I don't keep count, but have an app which does.

Morning all.
Blinking weird night. As hot as toast then cold this morning. The dog is hiding with his wooley coat. Cockapoo so not easy to keep cool.
I need to drive again today. Just down to the village for meds but I have to brace myself.
Other than that a bit of networking and job chasing.

checking in ladies. hope everyone is ok. feeling good to be present for my youngest DD 14 this evening and then a load of guilt for the drunken years of her seeing me swaying around or spaced out on the sofa. hanging on to something i heard in a sober podcast about shame losing its power in the light , which i think is largely true. also listened to the wonderful laura mackowen and her 9 things which are steering me through and helps me when i'm feeling guilty about having wasted so long on alcohol

It is not your fault.
It is your responsibility.
It’s unfair that this is your thing.
But it is your thing.
It will never stop being your thing until you face it.
You can’t do it alone.
But only you can do it.
I love you.
I will never stop reminding you of these things.

Hey all,

@ponzusoup - great post, I love those messages.

@WendyWagon - is the driving something that bothers you?

@EastCoastDamsel & @BigFatSoberLife

Excellent day counts 👏👏👏

I'm just on my way back from an awards dinner - didn't even cross my mind to drink 😮😮😮😮

Who is this person?!

@NextPhaseOfLife well done on getting through an awards dinner sober that sounds brilliant!

i'm off out for dinner tonight then a visit to my mum tomorrow which is always a massive trigger as we have a pretty dysfunctional relationship traces back to her terrible bullying and violence when we were kids. i keep up my duty and visit as she's alone but it's hard work on my well being as she attacks me and my life a lot.

i do know deep down that approaching it sober makes me stronger instead of the usual historical response of just getting pissed to cope with it, which started about aged 15!

and well done to all of your sober buddies you are all brave resilient and wonderful and we can all do this, especially together.

Morning all. Definitely feeling better today. Went for a "run" with dogs and DH first thing this morning

@ponzusoup lots of strength and love for tonight's dinner
@NextPhaseOfLife amazing to not even think about a drink at an awards ceremony. Looking forward to being there some day.

@WendyWagon I don't like driving in the dark, the headlights dazzle me and the narrow English roads cause me massive anxiety especially here in the country side. They way people just barrel along them too! I learned to drive in a country where my almost all the roads have hard shoulders, road markings including central markings, cat's eyes AND are wide enough to accommodate 2 cars abreast properly.

I have taken the morning off and am having a very long overdue haircut.

Day 27!

@EastCoastDamsel glad you are feeling better. enjoy your haircut!

@EastCoastDamsel enjoy your time off and your hair cut!

@ponzusoup good luck with the visit to your mum that sounds very hard.

I'm having a hard week. I've met lots of very angry people who aren't angry with me but the system I work in. It's exhausting tbh. I couldn't sleep last night as I've just been so full of anxiety, it's just been a bit much.

Onwards hoping everyone has restful weekends ahead x

Morning all.
A bit later today.

Wow to @ponzusoup for the helpful list. It really is our own this drinking dependancy.

@EastCoastDamsel the driving is just really down to my car. It is low down and a sports model. I have difficulty getting in and out. I may decide to order one through a mobility scheme but I've held back to see if I need to do any commuting with these new jobs. My DD will need the car come September as she will commute to uni. I am hoping I will be more mobile.

@Womanshour we used to have a lovely poster who was a senior nurse. Her work was intense and her drinking her support.
I actually can't remember the name.
I hope she is doing well. Difficult times in education, medicine and welfare.

Food shopping for me and more sorting. Have a peaceful day my friends.