No alcohol April - the place to share, moan and support

[Thelittlestranger]

Hello everyone!

Starting a new thread, my first one! Big thanks to @noalcohol2024 who originally set up these threads.

Come and chat if you are just giving it a go, starting a longer journey, or sober-curious.

Day 91 for me. I started this thinking I would do 100 days, and now I'm not sure when I'll stop. If at all.

Day 65 for me . The morning wake up knowing I’ve conquered another AF day far overrides the feeling that I’m missing out on wine the previous night. It is getting easier. I’ve purposely swerved nights out as I needed to give myself a fighting chance. Don’t worry if you’ve slipped up, getting back on that bumpy road is the most important thing. Reading these posts really does help, especially those who have reached the milestones and now feel so much healthier and brighter. Keep on keeping on.

Checking in! Day 14!

According to my app I have saved £196 & just shy of 14k calories!!! 😱

Now that's sobering!!

(Well, probably not the calories because the sugar cravings have been unreal! 🤣)
I have always been a cheese, crackers, nuts type but I'm now firmly a 5 Yr old in willy wonka's factory 🏭😅🍭🍬🍫

Well done @BrummieCahoots I haven't been able to manage a night out yet. I don't feel ready or trust myself.

Don't worry @Oopsdiditagain you stopped at 2. That is an achievement in itself. Be kind to yourself 🤗

12 weeks today I last had alcohol. I can't believe it. Unthinkable until recently. No cravings at all. I was drinking about 5 bottles a week, more some weeks. Menopausal women and alcohol are not a good mix. Feel quietly proud of myself. It has given me the impetus to make other changes.

Evening. Back to day 1 😩
Thanks everyone!!
yeh I have stopped beating myself up now & thinking I actually did ok stopping at 2 glasses & coming home..felt a little big smug this morning when chatting to the others who stayed out & are hungover, my sister in law can’t remember getting home & had to be up for work this morning & I felt the hangxiety for her I think 😂
well done to you all xx

Hi all, just checking in. Managed to do the weekend AF, so that's my first win. Was really craving a wine on Saturday evening, but I'd picked up some of those Trip cbd drinks in sainsburys, sonhad a couple of those instead - as recommended. I'm quite impressed! They definitely relaxed me and seemed to take the edge off. I had another can today whilst cooking Sunday dinner, as that would be another trigger for me to reach for the wine. So far, so good.

Morning! Checking in for day 15

I've got the NHS stop drinking app to track sobre days.. I've found ticking off the day as AF in the morning useful as it takes the decision to drink away... I've already decided I'm not going to drink for the day and marked it with the gold star in the app ...

I feel it takes the debate in my head away at the end of the day because I've already decided this morning that I'm not drinking today ... I dunno if that makes sense but seems to be working for me ATM...

It's the arguing with myself in my head that wares me out the most... Shall I have one ..one won't hurt .. what shall I have.. no don't have one at all.. etc etc

That's gone now as I have already made the decision. So try not to think about it again ... The visual calender full of stars of AF days is a good motivation for me as I find the day counting quite stressful which is a trigger for me

I'm not sure about these CBD drinks? Is it not swapping one bad habit for another? Are they addictive?
Like swapping smoking for vaping kind of thing?

To add to my post a couple below, for those starting their sober life, here is what I have found.

Massively better sleep. Much reduced anxiety. A feeling that my life is back in control- and if I can do this, I can do a lot of other things I thought were beyond me. More money in my bank account. Less time in supermarkets pondering whether to buy the Sauvignon Blanc or the Pinot Grigiot. 7 pounds down in weight. Wine belly is deflating every day, I have a waist. Less painful joints. Skin looks good.

Cons - some restaurants could up their game with the non alcoholic options. I have not substituted wine with any alcohol free alternatives but if I am going out I would like to have the option of a mock tail. I have been on holiday. Out every night. One mock tail in a week, the rest of the time sparkling water. Some restaurants need to be realise that sobering up is a thing, like being a vegetarian or vegan and their offer needs to catch up with this new movement.

@VanLife33 oh gosh, the ‘will I or won’t I drink’ torture. I hate that every Friday and Saturday.

I’ve come to realise for me that alcohol abuse is a form of self harm. I’m certainly not physically addicted. I don’t drink with ease most nights of the week. But that doesn’t mean I’m in control. Once that bottle is open, there’s pretty much no stopping me.

It’s only since joining the alcohol support boards that I’ve started to really analyse my relationship with alcohol. I use it to beat myself up. Set unrealistic goals and then fail. Which is when the fuck it attitude comes in and I’m back to where I began. This is what I need to change. Hopefully a long break will help me do that.

Finally sorted out my Bongo Bingo dilemma .. just messaged my friend yesterday and was honest .. said that alcohol has started to make me feel terrible so I'm packing it in ... couldn't put myself in harms way next Saturday as too early in the process. He was so lovely and replied that not all friends have to go out and get drunk .. some meet for food and a gossip, so that's what we are doing instead in a couple of weeks . Next weekend my husband and son are both away so I'm having a self care weekend involving lots of fresh air, coffee, reading and peace

@AFmammaG I completely relate to what you just said, especially with the fuck it attitude.. I've not thought about it like that before! Thank you!

@BrummieCahoots that's great your friend is so supportive!
And your self care weekend sounds perfect ❤️

It's day 100 for a few of us today, so jumping on to congratulate those hitting the milestone with me. Well done us 👏🏼👏🏼 Can't quite believe I made it and currently still have no intention to drink. I thought I would be crawling to the end.

@BrummieCahoots sounds like you are putting you first. Enjoy it!!

Congratulations to everyone hitting their 100 days . Amazing . Hope to be posting that myself in a few months ! Day 9

Well done to those making it 100 days today!

How do you feel? Do you all plan to keep on going ?

Day 16 for me !

I'm 100 days tomorrow - can hardly believe it of myself! 😂

I'm certain I'd like to remain alcohol free for the most part. I know that I've gained so much back, and I don't want it to be the default or part of my day to day life any more. Not drinking in front of my children feels 100% positive. And I can't be a home drinker, as I know it will spiral.

However, I must confess I'm curious about an occasional drink or two, with the emphasis on it being an occasion, rather than the norm. I'm undecided. Will I still enjoy the taste/feeling? If I do enjoy it, will I immediately want more, and then more? (in which case I wouldn't want to). My DP has been moderating fairly well, but in spite of that I've still seen it causing him various minor problems he wouldn't have had without it. Is it worth it?

Looking back over my 100 days, it's been almost entirely a positive thing for me. However there were one or two occasions where a drink might have been nice and/or I've felt a bit flat when I'd have rather joined in. Would I be able to correctly identify those occasions, or would I drink and regret it? or alternatively try and turn every occasion into one and end up back at square one? I'm not sure yet!

Anyway, just some musings! No plans to drink at all on the horizon for me and I am now through my small run of social occasions which would normally have been quite boozy.

I have started to suspect I might suffer low dopamine levels, for one reason or another. I might look into this a bit more and research possible healthier alternatives, before I consider any future alcohol intake.

Interested to hear from others too!

Congratulations to everyone achieving or imminently achieving their 100 days 😁🥳🥳

Congratulations to those celebrating 100 days! 🚫🥂

It feels a very long road at the moment but each day I'm noticing all the positives. I try to remember them in my bad/low moments.
I hope to be sharing a 100 day post myself in 84 days! 🤞

@DJer24 thanks for your 100 day feedback!

Lots to think about! Good luck on what ever you decide!.

Are you going to set another goal? Or take it day by day? Are you still going to count each day ?

Wow!!! Congratulations all on 100 days 🥳 well done, I’m on day 3 or day 8 minus 1 🙈

Well done on your 100 days everyone who's made it there. And for all the people for whom it feels a long way off, it really does get easier the longer you go. I promise.

100 days for me too! Feeling good and planning to continue for now. Congrats to all the other 100 day people!

100 days here too!

It's my birthday tomorrow and we are going out for dinner so I might have my first drink of 2024 then.. or may not..will wait and see how I feel.

@Rainbowbrite83 congratulations 🎉

And happy birthday 🎂 x

Thanks @VanLife33 😊

What has been helping me along is that I always give myself 'permission' to have a drink if I want one. That way I don't see it as if I am denying myself anything.

I have also stopped thinking too far ahead too.. so I don't fret about upcoming events anymore, and the 'will I drink/is it going to be a battle' etc internal dialogue has quietened right down.

I decide on the day and in the moment, and what's been interesting for me so far, has been in that moment I just haven't been arsed enough with the prospect of having a drink to have one!

Im not sure if Im making sense here, but it seems to be working for me for now.

I have also told myself that the aim is not to be teetotal forever, and I strongly believe I will drink again, but it will be when I really want one and not through some embedded habit telling me I have to drink at social occasions as some kind of weird 'rule'!

Takes the pressure off massively for me too!

OH and I and the kids are going out for posh pizza this evening, Friday I am out with the girls and Saturday we are spending the night with my best friend and husband and alcohol will very much feature in all of the above.

I will decide at each what I do. 😊

Congratulations to everyone hitting 100 days. I can’t imagine how freeing that must feel.

Yes! What an achievement you lovely lot! Congratulations 👏