No alcohol April - the place to share, moan and support

[Thelittlestranger]

Hello everyone!

Starting a new thread, my first one! Big thanks to @noalcohol2024 who originally set up these threads.

Come and chat if you are just giving it a go, starting a longer journey, or sober-curious.

Day 91 for me. I started this thinking I would do 100 days, and now I'm not sure when I'll stop. If at all.

Joining in thanks for the thread, aiming for an Alcohol-free April. Lots of reasons: have been drinking way too much (failed Dry January), need to do this for my health. DH is just about to lose his job through ill-health, so won't be getting a new job anytime soon, so really need to cut our spending. He's quit smoking so I need to do my part and cut out drinking.

@VanLife33 I can only recommend reading Allen Carr's 'Quit drinking without alcohol.'

It just made sense to me - although it felt a little brain washy, I listened to it on Spotify on my dog walks and there is loads that resonated about moderation being impossible, and why. It also talks about making it feel so hard to stop drinking that you make it impossible to stop. It's about not wanting to drink, rather than wanting to stop. So those hard moments haven't (yet) happened for me.

I am by no means cured and it might be that I give moderation a go again one day - which means I should probably listen to the book again 🤣 - but right now I'm just not interested in drinking and I find that liberating.

And to everyone else - not having hangxiety is bliss. That's how my year started on January 1st and I never want to feel like that again.

@Oopsdiditagain please don't be too hard on yourself. We've all done it. Just use this horrible feeling to keep you on the wagon now.
Also remember that a lot of the self loathing it sounds like you're feeling is just alcohol withdrawal. You can do it.
I'm 110 days today and honestly I feel so much better. Less anxiety, less heartburn, better sleep. No more 3am panicked wake ups. And I have so much more TIME to do other stuff.
Well done for deciding April will be clean and healthy everyone.

You sound just like me, always woke up with that massive dread, disappointment and sadness. Never ever want to feel that way again. You can do it, nothing has ever been more worth it. I lied to my kids too, but they were old enough to know that I was. Forever gutted and ashamed about that. Fortunately I can remember precisely how that felt, but also that I never have to feel it again. You can do it, have faith in yourself x

Thankyou Itsrainingten
I’m going to try & get some sleep, I never want to feel like this again, I honestly haven’t felt like this before, but then I don’t usually drink 5 nights on the run, I finished work last Wednesday & just went on one….WHY?????

Joining in. I did dry January, which extended to dry February but I've drunk every weekend bar one during March and know that I just can't do moderation. So back on the wagon I go.

Hello can I please join in? I've drank since mid teens and have used it to block out a number of traumatic experiences. It has been moderately successful - for a few hours. But then I wake up and the anxiety kicks in and nothing changes or improves.

I've tried to stop and moderate numerous times. Obviously unsuccessfully. It's such an ingrained habit though.

So I'm stopping and working on my brain /mind which keeps giving me the message that I can drink and it's enjoyable. It's a real mental fight.

I've started the naked mind 30 day thing again. The 1st month is fairly easy for me, but complacency and boredom kick in and I relapse after a few months.

I want to succeed this time

@Oopsdiditagain thank you for posting. So much of what you are saying is relatable and I hope you feel better soon.
I feel like this thread is exactly what I need right now. I also drank far too much over Easter (after promising myself a dry one). Sitting on the sofa last night it was like something was missing. I now have day 1 under my belt though and I’m feeling pretty determined this time.

Sitting on the sofa last night it was like something was missing. I now have day 1 under my belt though and I’m feeling pretty determined this time.

Could you maybe treat yourself to a nice AF drink? I like kombucha or Trip CBD drinks. Then you still have something nice to look forward to 😊

@Itsrainingten that’s definitely something to try, thanks for the recommendation haven’t heard of Trip CBD before, will look it up.

joining with 31st March being my day 1. I fell off the wagon at the beginning of March after managing over 100 days. Went on holiday and just couldn’t deal with sitting in pubs etc without a drink and crumbled. Felt awful and told myself as soon as I got back home I’d give up drink again but have had two incidents since of drinking too much and right back to hangxiety, self loathing worry about what I’ve said and done and not being able to fulfill my daily duties without feeling like I want to crawl back in bed.
just need to admit to myself that I can’t moderate, that I don’t want this for myself and that I can succeed and that this feeling isn’t stronger than me so I can’t let it take control.

All of this resonates so strongly with me.

I've taken quite a fancy to San Pellegrino. And chocolate.

Joining

@Donkeysdontdance
good luck 🍀
I am really struggling today. I’m so determined not to ever feel like this again, my poor son has just asked if I need to go the hospital as he can’t understand where I have got this bug from, feel so ashamed & so low.

@Oopsdiditagain when did you last drink? Is it possible you do have food poisoning or similar? I’ve had some bad hangovers in my time but they do usually show signs of improvement on day 2. Are you still struggling to keep water down? It might be an idea to get some medical advice if so.

@AFmammaG
I have drank from last Wednesday till last night, so definitely think it’s the alcohol, I have just manage to keep a glass of water down, haven’t tried to eat anything yet. I am a bit scared it could be slight alcohol poisoning as I have never felt this bad

Ah ok, I thought you had last drink on 31st, that makes sense then.
Poor you painkillers and time are probably the only thing that will help right now.

Hi all, well done to all of us committed to fry March and beyond! I am day 100 + (not counting anymore) but bored out of my bloody brain. I was ummming and aching over having 'just one' over Easter but I didn't.

Someone earlier in this thread said about being out of the bubble and that's how I feel. It was like watching a TV show with everyone relaxed and enjoying themselves and me with my 0% rose. I don't know. Just feeling very flat!

I need to remind myself of the horrendous hangovers I would get and the fact I could only moderate 30% of the time. I think that's where my danger is - the fact that I can moderate sometimes and have a great night.

Good to see some old names here @VanLife33 @Ginandtoxic @TeeNoG @Jeffsmeffsmiff @everlastingpanini @Limeandsober @PissPotPourri and anyone else I have missed.

I really recommend those Trip drinks. The ginger and peach one is the best. I also have kombucha and Kylie Minogue Rose (it's really nice).

I just need to keep reading and listening to quit lit and following the socials. They definitely help. Keep going everyone!!

Oh and @Samsond - sorry, I saw that you had name checked me on the March thread. Hope you are well xx

Just to add re CBD drinks, that Goodray drinks are worth a try too. They’re not so easily available, online only, but they’re double the amount of CBD and have some good flavours.
I’m really enjoying these CBD drinks as a substitute as the last thing I wanted to do personally was replace alcohol calories with sugary drink calories- id rather find another positive to giving up, and potential weight loss is definitely one of them. Who knows if the CBD does anything, but I certainly feel relaxed and sleep heavily when I have one or two.
As others have said, holding onto those negative feelings after a bender is definitely one way of helping to stay strong. Like @wannabedry I’ve managed to stay dry for quite a while, but am struggling in lots of ways. Annie Grace in her book says nobody really likes the taste of alcohol, but I am seriously missing a good glass of red. I honestly cannot abide any alcohol free wines, to be they are absolutely dreadful. However, the thought of going back to sweaty, interrupted sleep, health fears and resenting my kids’ extra curricular activities for interrupting early wine time is keeping me going! I’m holding on to those positives and hoping it gets easier

Thanks @PissPotPourri - I have tried those Goodrays ones before, from Amazon and did like them. The purple one was my favourite. They are expensive but completely priceless if it means I don't get hanxiety the next day (or week).

Yes, I have done the occasional 'journal' entry and reminded myself exactly how I feel the following day after a night of failed moderation. I think it's been so long now though that I'm in the trap of thinking I can moderate. I'm on holiday next month and already toying with the idea of having a drink at the airport (just one!) and a few drinks on holiday. But then, like Annie Grace says and also Jason Vale, we have all been sold a MASSIVE LIE and it's all bollocks. We have been sucked into the marketing of it all - pretty bottles and images of being glam, big sunglasses with a glass in our hand. It's ethanol! Why am I craving actual poison?! I've not read the Alan Carr book but might give that a shot. I'm just missing that 'light headed' feeling. Gross, really.

Actually, to be fair - I do think the CBD drinks have a very minor effect. Could be placebo, but whatever, I'll take it.

This thread is really helping, knowing that we are out there in the wild!

Have a good ethanol free evening all x

Checking in! I'm on day 92, and really credit the Goodrays drinks with getting me through the danger hour at home when it strikes. Just one is enough for me though.

I also felt a bit flat at events this weekend, but could also have been hormonal...

Any tips on getting to sleep without a drink , im in bed but same as last night cant nod off

@pnutter I tend to read, I’ll probably struggle to sleep tonight too as usually do after been drinking a lot, anyway I have survived the day…hoping to feel much better tomorrow 🤞🏻 hope you get some sleep

Hope you're feeling much better now @Oopsdiditagain