It's day 1! Anyone else?

[Thepeppapigfanclub]

I'm 45. I've been drinking a bottle/bottle and a half a night for as long as I can remember with the odd dry January/ Stoptober along the way - but I always end up back on the wine again.

I'm a parent to a 13 year old and the shame that comes with this is crippling. It's not good and I know I HAVE GOT to stop. I am sick of the self-loathing, the fear, the anxiety and the money down the drain. Most of all, I'm worried about shuffling of this mortal coil leaving my child before I should.

So it's day one (again) for me. I just wondered if anybody else has picked this as their day one too for some support.

Any tips for the first week?

Many thanks - there's some seriously inspirational people on here reading some of the other threads - I'm in awe of all of those who've made it to six months, a year and beyond. It feels beyond my grasp.

I’m here! I spent all weekend outside in which was glorious. And someone told me yesterday I’d lost loads of weight (I haven’t but booze bloat perhaps has gone).

Still missing wine definitely, even if the “must have” voice is quieter and easier to deal with but I’m still not sure what my actual goal is but feeling a teensie bit stubborn about it, so that’s helpful.

Sundays are usually okay because I rarely drink anyway knowing Monday would be unbearable if I did and it would set a really bad precedent for the week.

Can I join too. So fed up of drinking for stress. Encouraged by the amazing posts on here, so supportive.

Welcome aboard @Whatsgoingon12345! I've done a lot of moaning this weekend but honestly - I really do feel a million times better. I look at least 10 times better. There's so much more time! The weekends can be tricky but the mornings are brilliant. Get yourself some new PJs and some nice teas and settle in. 😂

Have a great day everyone!

Morning all. Really struggled yesterday and am so glad today is Monday. Need the distraction of school and work. Hope everyone has a good day.

Glad we got through the weekend. I had a nice weekend but got really slammed with cravings yesterday afternoon and was feeling very sorry for myself. Luckily, I had downloaded an app onto my phone called "Surf the Urge". It actually really helped in the moment ... I could figure out why it was that I wanted a drink (what the underlying feeling was). Take deep breaths etc. In reality it was only 20 mins of brain noise and then I was over it. Feeling fine now, a quiet week ahead which is what I need.

Sorry to hear so many are having those horrible cravings. Maybe a non drink related treat would act as a pick me up?

I went shopping today to get a couple of new tops for work. I am definitely a good dress size down around the stomach. I usually take in about 10 items and think I look awful in all of them. Today I found 2 tops to buy and there were a couple of others that looked nice/fitted but I decided against. It was so nice to have a choice!

35 days under my belt. I’m really buying into the ‘nourish not punish’ mentality more every day. Have drank loads of water and eaten loads of fruit today. Trying really hard to stretch out this positive feeling for as long as possible.

Have a good week everyone.

Evening all.

Just checking in. I hope everyone who is 'new' is getting on ok. I remember struggling to sleep in the beginning - now I can't keep my eyes open!

I'm also glad it's a new week - it's always more manageable through the week. We really are doing so well! I think MamaGhina is right... it must be time for some treats. (Glad it is going so well!) I'm ordering some spring bulbs to start planting over the next few weeks.

Have you all got something nice to look forward to? 'Go Sober October' next week...at least we have a head start. 😂

agree to treats. I will need to think of some!

on the plus side, my house is really really clean. 😝

Urgh. The RAGE yesterday was something to behold. I have no idea where it came from other than I am stressed for quite a lot of reasons. It eventually tailed off as I focused on other things but my ability to conduct huge, vast, largely made up arguments in my head is just ridiculous. Happily no translation to “must drink” but dammit, when is the pink cloud phase scheduled for? Even if it’s only temporary I would like some highs to temper the lows…

It is good though that you are "feeling your feelings" instead of numbing them out @TimesaChangeling . I felt horribly guilty about something earlier but it passed. Not easy but all part of life eh.

The sleep is great but the vivid dreams are hard to get used to! Especially the drinking ones. I'm sure they will settle and can actually be quite a good warning.

I need treats which are not sugar/fat laden. I'll have to have a think on that.

Listened to a new podcast yesterday which I want to share to you all called Sober Powered, specifically episode 170 which is all about dopamine and early sobriety. It is really interesting and explains a lot. It's only about 20 mins long, 15 if you skip the ads at the start.

This is day one for me. Well, yesterday was so this is day 2. I feel agitated. I'm off work and nothing to look forward to. Stupid, I know, as I'm slowly killing myself. I come from a family of heavy drinkers. I have so much to lose if I carry on. I've volunteered to do the night shift again, so that means 4 nights a week, I can't drink... why can't I be a take it or leave it girl

Last night I went to sleep around 10pm and didn't wake up at all until 7am. This is unheard of!

Although for the sake of complete transparency I have had the odd glass of wine here and there but nothing like what I had been drinking previously.

Evening all. I hope you're all doing well.

I'm with you @Steppered. I also need to think of some treats that are not calorie based. Tricky.

The cravings aren't too bad today. Now it's just a permanent state of 'Do I want a drink. Yes. Am I going to have one - no.' I'm coming to a place off acceptance that this is how it just going to be from now on until the brain gets the message. Who only knows how long that might be. 😂

It's like a break-up. You can't get over it until you're over it I suppose. Really annoying though... At least I'm not kidding myself with the 'this time it will be different' and trying to moderate. That has never ended well for me so at least that is progress. I could have a drink but - what would be the point.

Welcome @bellalou1234 you will find lots of support here.

I hear you on the sleep front @ApolloandDaphne - I am sleeping loads! I am a little envious of the off glass here or there. I am not sure I am strong enough for that.

@Steppered i need to listen to that podcast but I don’t do podcasts - how do I do it???

So I am day 23 and I haven’t been close to breaking yet. I am feeling very proud but also wondering whether this is me forever or whether I am aiming for moderation. As we say though, one day at a time,

@Steppered found the Podcast- was being thick!

on the plus side, my house is really really clean. 😝
Same! I am so productive right now.

I also keep having that annoying conversation @Thepeppapigfanclub. Always on the way home from work. I want a drink but I won’t have a drink. Sometimes I mentally move on quickly, other times it takes longer.

Welcome @bellalou1234, you are in good company. Monday night should be an easy night for me and I’m focusing on that 40 day milestone this week. When I hit 50 I’m going to treat myself to some expensive face products, make up remover and the like. Normally I begrudge spending money on something frivolous like that but given I would have saved £££ by then, I will make an exception.

Just realised it’s Tuesday 🤣 where did Monday go?!

See my house is a shit hole! Why have I not got the cleaning urge??? Not fair!

No it's not fair @BoilingHotand50something - same as why I am not stick thin by now. 😂That being said, I could content for being the most moisturised and hydrated woman in the uk. 😂

Good idea about the face products @MamaGhina. You really, really, really deserve them. My app tells me in month and days so I've lost count - relying on you to give the actual days. I was thinking about this the other day about how I really begrudge buying myself anything nice...

According to my App I have 'saved' £364 already. 😲😲😲

Bloody hell- why am I not thin either??!! I deserve it. [grumbles]. I have started eating off bread and butter plates to try and shift some weight. I am quite... hungry.

I have also saved almost exactly that much as well @Thepeppapigfanclub !! I rather hoped though that i would not be limping towards payday eking out what is left in my bank account, though.

The cravings are strong. I keep repeating 'purveyors of poison' whenever I pass the wine aisle. (A friend of mine calls it the 'Aisle of Broken Dreams'. That works too. )

Day 38. Was feeling quite tired today but put the kids to bed and went for a run 😇 have stopped running in the park after dark so tried a new route. Can’t believe how far I can go now without feeling like I’m going to die…! One of the benefits of 38 days without a cigarette.

Hope everyone else is having a good week.

Well. One three day hearing down. 5 hours on the stand giving professional evidence under cross examination. I worked much of Sunday and read in for 3/4 hours Monday and Tuesday evenings. I have worked 40 hours already this week and under stress. Judgement in 4 weeks.

I am in bed and as a treat am sipping a 0% G&T. This is day 80. Hoping I might pass a weight milestone soon.

I am seeing an endocrinologist/General physician in just over a fortnight for an opinion about: cholesterol, ALP - probably raised due to a medication, thyroid (treated), cholesterol, vitamin D. I really would welcome some tailored advice about the cholesterol and whether a statin is actually necessary. Blah, blah, blah. My echogenic mildly fatty liver was due to being too fat rather than the wine. That's what my medical record says.

@MamaGhina I highly recommend Clinique's cleansing face balm. It removes every scrap of make-up with the help of a warm face flannel. It's about £30 but lasts for about 5 months. My skin is v v soft after using it for 6/7 months I moisturise with a bit of anything.

Well done everyone and remember you are doing it Because You Are Worth It.

@SpringNotSprung you must be shattered. Well done on the 80 days. What an achievement. Are you still feeling the benefits or is this just normal for you now?

Thanks for the skin care recommendation. Day 50 and I’ll be treating myself!

@SpringNotSprung my ALP was raised but I think my hypothyroidism was a bit under-treated. I’ve upped my dose of Armour thyroid now. I had a scan of my liver which showed it was a big fatty even though I’d been off alcohol for 5 months by then. I was very overweight though - very close to being obese. I’ve now lost over 2 stone and my liver enzymes are normal now thankfully. My weight is in the healthy range (top end). I gave up alcohol On Boxing Day so 9 months alcohol free now. Well done on getting to day 80! I’m finding it much easier now thankfully.