On A Mission To Moderate or Absolutely Abstaining? Join us for encouragement, support and non - judgemental chat.

[Amdone123]

So, January is done and dusted - Praise the Lord. Following on from our last thread ( which was initially designed to help us moderate, but for some has - maybe - led to abstaining, thanks to how great they're feeling ), a new thread has been created.
So, if you're looking to abstain or want to moderate, or just need to chat in general, join us here.
Hallo to previous posters - onwards and upwards.

@Manyrivers Good that you’re giving it a go, if nothing else all AF days are a bonus for your liver.
One of the things that resonated In The Sober Diaries, was it’s author Clare writing that so many of us drinks give up for a week or two, start drinking regularly, give up again, start drinking, over and over and over ( as did she). The first weeks are the HARDEST and yet they are the ones we all do more than any other.

After my massive drinking session yesterday I was out tonight and didn’t drink and I’m home with bottles and I’m not drinking. Mostly because I know the feeling/ temptation/craving will pass and I’ll be fine tomorrow. I’m not sure how long I can rest on my laurels of 47 days but it definitely easier to say no after 40 days than 4.

I’m all or nothing. So I really can’t drink 3 or 4 times a week. I’m know I’m not going to say I’ll never drink again but it needs to be very very sporadic I think.

Morning all.
Thanks for your posts, they're really giving me lots to think about.
I was af Monday which in itself was an achievement as everyone else appeared to be socialising.
Yesterday I woke up, depressed. Not like me at all. I'm going on holiday Monday 17th but saw a flight for today and was so tempted to book it. Just book it and literally feck off. Anyway, I didn't and told myself I just need to get through this week.
I wasn't intending to drink yesterday but on the way home bought 1 bottle. I watched the tennis last night - and though that was awful - both brits lost , I had a good evening.
I think I just wanted to escape. I'm sick of thinking about it really, that and dieting. I don't even know why I diet. I like the way I look. It's just a habit, I suppose.
Anyway, it's all out of my system. Going to work today, out tomorrow, Friday I'll walk very far 🤣, Saturday out again - don't even want to go - and Monday on holiday where at least I can walk and think about what I want.
I'm happy most of the time - I think I'm possibly being a bit dramatic !
Thanks for reading ❤️

Hello everyone. Sorry to hear you’re feeling a bit flat @Amdone123 Hope you’re feeling better soon.

Hope you all enjoyed the Easter break. The

I didn’t post over Easter because as usual I was doing okay moderating in terms of quantity but not so well in terms of AF nights. I’m just home from work an OH is drinking already so I’m in another room with my lemon and ginger tea and trying not to think about it.

@EnoughEnoughnow , that's hard - I would struggle even more if my dh drank.
At least you're moderating in terms of quantity. I think that's good. Though, yesterday I did only have 1 bottle. A few years ago, buying 1 bottle wouldn't have even happened. Was always 2.
Enjoy your lemon tea, I really enjoy them. Play it forward and think about how refreshed you'll feel tomorrow.

@Amdone123 sorry your feeling like that. Great to have your holiday coming, to reboot and refresh. @EnoughEnoughnow well done with the tea, I think I would find that very hard of DH was drinking. I wouldn't need much persuading to give in. I had 3 glasses last night and DH had one . Red wine is my downfall. Hoping to do today AF. Just today!! Fingers crossed.

Thank you @Amdone123 and @stoppingnow

Well… I’ve made it. I’ve had a very productive night. I’ve put all my clean washing away, washed up after dinner, ironed my clothes for work, sent chord charts to people I play music with, and have my exercise clothes ready for work. If I jog on the spot for five minutes I’ll have done my 10,000 steps too :)

Goodnight, and thanks for the moral support. It really helps

God I’m tired. I mean exercise clothes ready so that I can exercise before work :)

@Amdone123 sorry to hear you’re feeling flat today. We all have those days.

You are right that we get into silly habits and mind games. Tuesday morning I felt quite depressed about my Monday drinks then realised I’m not trying to lose weight right now, I had fun, I’m not hungover, what’s my problem - then I relaxed.

I am reminding myself my goal is to not drink excessively, and learn to do it in moderation.

I finally got my butt down to get some blood tests done today. I’m getting my hormones etc checked for a skin pigmentation issues I have. It’s the only explanation for it! I have no doubt that alcohol and diet are affecting things. I’m looking forward to the results next week.

@Swannyb , you're so right. Everything you've said in that post is spot on. I do need to relax more. I think I just find it exhausting sometimes thinking , more overthinking really. My dh is really good at bringing me back down to earth, and reminding me that I have done really well with the drinking. Thanks and hope your tests go OK.
@EnoughEnoughnow , wow, that was productive. I was tired just reading that 🤣

What’s everyone’s plans for the weekend? I managed another alcohol free night. I have some vodka to last a moderate Friday and Saturday night then I’ll be AF on Sunday, Tuesday - Thursday. I’m going paddle boarding with a friend early Sunday morning, so a good incentive to not drink too much on Saturday night.

I thought the scales could have been a bit kinder this morning!!!

Hope everyone is good :)

Good morning everyone I have not been AF on my holiday but also haven’t had another hangover so feeling ok. I’ve eaten everything though! Time to go back to SW I fear. I’ve tried self-control but I’m getting fatter so now I’ll have to accept defeat and rejoin the cult - I did lose 6.5 stone with them before but put 3 back on!!!

@EnoughEnoughnow well done on your af night.I was out last night, I did drink quite a lot, was up dancing. I feel OK today, lazy day watching films and reading so all good. Omg, don't talk to me about scales 🤣@Bigbus , I'm the same. I have to be really on it to lose weight, and I do lose it, but gawd, it's hard work. I'm thinking of trying keto again. SW is good, though. I could probably have another stab at that. It put me off before because a glass of wine was 20 syns, but I'd probably be ok with that now. I would just not drink. Famous last words 😩

Please can I join your thread?
I am having a bit of a wake up call as my mum is developing some serious health issues (she’s 20 years older than me), and has been a life long drinker. Very functioning, doesn’t really get drunk often, but she drinks daily a lot of the time. She now has high blood pressure and heart problems.

Since the kids and I finished school for Easter, I have drank at least a couple of beers and a bottle of wine every day. Before that, I was having around a half bottle a night on a work day, and more Friday, Saturday and Sunday. Probably Thursday too. I usually do dry January, but didn’t finish this year - stressful job, family shit etc etc.

I don’t feel like I want to become completely alcohol free, but I want to stop midweek drinking, and really reduce the amount I drink at the weekend. My skin is bad, I have put on weight, I feel crap when I get up most days. I also need to not see holidays as a free for all. It’s such a big swing in mindset, I don’t know if I’m best just doing it all at once, or choosing one part and trying that for a while, then stepping it up.

I really need to change. I cried for a little while last night with the worry of what I am doing to myself - I still drank though.

I am going to read through your posts now, thank you.

@YouknoweverythingJonSnow , hi there and of course you can join. Sorry to hear about your mum - you sound like you've got a lot going on atm.
It's good that you're wanting to do something about the alcohol intake.
You could make a plan for this week, either abstain and see how you get on, how you feel on a day to day basis, or set some days as af and some when you'll moderate?
We'll help you - we're all in a similar predicament. You're right about the mindset - it's really difficult.
I'm not doing too well at the moment and on holiday next week but I'll still help you.
You can do it and you're not alone ❤️

Also @YouknoweverythingJonSnow , the Annie Grace 30 day alcohol experiment is really good for addressing the balance. I loved doing it.
It's free - just Google and sign up. You get daily video clips to motivate you, etc.
Worth a try ?

Just back from my night away to see a gig...I definitely moderated because I couldn't settle on a drink and just wasn't feeling it and REALLY didn't want a hangover. Just counted we had 8 rounds of drinks and I only had alcoholic drinks for half of those, and I switched to water/nothing/lime and soda for the last four.

Unfortunately I have been drinking since last weekend though. I had my week off, a night where I easily stopped at two but then....the next night I didn't distract myself so I've been having 2-5 glasses of wine every night since. Gig puts an end to that streak though!

I listened to more of 'atomic habits' by James clear on the train on the way back - which was good. Nothing new really but I like how the book just collates everything and focuses the mind.

I also saw an advert for another book 'Feeling Blah?' by Tanith Carey why Anhedonia has left you joyless and how to recapture life's highs, so I've gone ahead and bought that too.

@Coppergate3 that's a good result from your gig night. Well done. I've got a hangover today, bloody awful. 😩
I have never read any quit lit. I seem to have an aversion to it. I should try it one day.

Thank you, I’m not very close to my mum lately, but it’s still a shock and a worry as to what lies ahead for me too.

I actually did the 30 day experiment along with dry January last year, and enjoyed it. I’m not ready for 30 days AF at the moment though 🙈 Things have changed a lot since January 22!

I have caught up with the thread from the beginning of March, and am looking forward to joining in. From reading, I think having a plan and trying to stick to it, but not worrying if I have a slip will be the best way forward.

I’ve decided to try to moderate today and tomorrow - only drink beer until the kids are in bed, then some wine, but not loads. Sunday I will have a glass of two with the roast, then no more after tea. Then try to be AF until Friday. I’m also lucky that my DH feels the same way, so we will be attempting this together.

@Coppergate3 well done at the gig and sorry you are feeling rough today @Amdone123, me too 😩

@YouknoweverythingJonSnow , that sounds like a plan. I forget it's Friday. So, from Sunday, after your 2 glasses, af til Friday.

I'd just take one day at a time and try not to think too far ahead.

Thank you @Amdone123 & @YouknoweverythingJonSnow . Sorry you're both feeling rough though 😟 I'm now bizarrely concerned that the fact that I'm not will mean my drinking run will continue - unlike last week when I feeling rough was all I needed to keep me away from it! I need to pick up a project this afternoon...deep cleaning a room would be good - as everywhere is dirty I'm spoilt for choice!

'Atomic habits' and 'feeling blah?' aren't quit lit (although I do have several of those in my audible/kindle library...none of which have been completed!) really but I think it is all related I think...

Right! Time for some cleaning therapy!

Hi Everyone and welcome @YouknoweverythingJonSnow. Just checking in. I've hit a low and today I'm hungover and anxious. Hate this feeling but accept its an evil of my wine drinking last night. @Amdone123 where did our early week motivation go!

@Manyrivers 🤣. I know. I honestly don't know what's happening with me. Possibly a mid life crisis 😩🤣
I know what it is really. It's because last night I had to go out, tomorrow I have to go out, Monday I have to go on holiday, so I know I'm going to drink, so I drink. Plus, Easter didn't help.
That's my excuse anyway. All or nothing.
I think after my holiday I'm going to get my act together.
Actually, I really don't want to drink tomorrow - it's a house party day thing - so I'll just take my sparkling water and eat. I can't be hungover on Sunday, I haven't even packed yet !

I am terrible for that...I say to myself eg it's holiday next week, so I might as well drink more now as I will be soon anyway 😵‍💫

I did ok last night, two cans of beer between 6.30 and 9.30 and then just over half a bottle of wine. Slept in this morning too so feel better. Aiming for the same today.

@YouknoweverythingJonSnow , that's good. You didn't have too much.
I was obviously hungover but couldn't get to sleep til about 2am - I couldn't understand it.
I'll post after, granddaughter just arrived.