The freedom thread ( continued ) Riding the rollercoaster of an alcohol free life!

[Adm1010]

Hello all

This is a thread for people who have decided that life is much better without alcohol!🤩 These threads were started by @Drybird, and they have changed the lives of many people.

Some posters on these threads have been sober for a long time, and some are only just starting. We are a very friendly and inclusive bunch and we are always excited when someone new joins the thread. The only thing we ask is that our posters have given up alcohol completely. Talk of moderation can be triggering for some people, so this thread is not the right place for that (there are other moderation threads🙂).

We are a supportive welcoming bunch. No question is ever to “ silly “ and their is generally someone around if you are struggling

So just come here to chat or vent or check in . Whatever you need as you ride the rollercoaster of an alcohol free life

Thankyou to bunnies for hosting the last thread.
And here’s to the next 40 pages

I think it is very common when you are a drinker to think as you don't do "XYZ" (drink in the morning / drink everyday / drink on your own..... or whatever your parameters of choice are) that you are in control.

As you rightly say though @Shortkiwi we are all only a few unlucky life events from being the type of drinker we pity and think we'll never be.

28 days/4 weeks sober today, feels like its been forever lol.

@Cruncymum I used to think I was all ok as I never had or needed a drink before 8pm, funny how we kid ourselves..

@Savbunny Yes if you are fine with them drinking it wouldn't hurt to let them know. At the moment I don't think I'm in a place where that would suit me. It's awesome that you are

Morning
Been away from thread but trying to read and catch up which isn’t really possible
Quite easy for me to report in as AF as still in hospital ! It’s seems one step forward and one in reverse.
Keep focused all
Well done on finishing your placement Champ
Waves to I am your equal, kindness, borrowbox and anyone else at all x

Morning

How are you @AlloftheTime? Still in hospital I see, are you feeling any better?

@SavBbunny definitely let friends know that you still want to be invited out and that you are fine for them to drink. Otherwise they may assume (wrongly) that you don't want to come out.

I'm feeling good today. No particular reason, just content with me.

That’s so nice @Kindtomyself that you’re feeling good.
@AlloftheTime sorry you’re still in hospital, I hope you’re starting to feel better!

Morning all.
Woke up without the crippling RA pain. Will be out and about hunting new AF tipples. Husband buys something new for me every week which is sweet. Got a cupboard building which is hilarious as that hasn't happened since 2009.
Hope everyone is well.

@SavBbunny

Sorry to hear you suffer with R.A.

I have PsA (Psoriatic Arthritis). Sadly have been in flare since January but seem to be coming out out other side now.

Morning all

Such a beautiful day out there, hope everyone gets to enjoy it in some way.

Congratulations on 4 weeks @BraveFaceScaredInside

Hope those that are unwell feel better soon, and you get out of hospital @AlloftheTime How long have you been there now? Are you feeling any better?

I had a lovely sober girls night, and it didn't feel like anything was missing. Now determined to get out and enjoy the weekend.

I am really behind here but just checking in to say happy weekend to you all. I’ve had an unusual couple of weeks - dh is back to doing longer trips for work and dd’s school trips have started again. I chose not to drink at least twice. My trigger is definitely dealing with different situations or “normal” situations for the first time in an alcohol free context. We had a friend over for dinner who we hadn’t eaten with in ages and I felt a bit odd with my AF beer instead of wine, but I think it was probably only me that gave it more than a second’s thought. Getting up clear headed on a Saturday morning is still the best feeling ever. 496 days today and my 500 day reward bike will hopefully be here this week. To everyone who is starting/struggling/restarting - you can do this. The early days are definitely the hardest but it is so worth it.

Hello all,

Hope it's ok for me to join?

I have had issues with alcohol for over 10 years now, and with 3 children and one who is old enough to see how much I am drinking I need to knock it on the head. My anxiety is through the roof and I am so puffy and feel horrible about myself.

Has anyone else noticed that when they started to become 'sober curious' their drinking got a thousand times worse? It's almost like the alcoholic on my shoulder knows I want to kick it to the curb and so is trying to take hold even more. I had a day of very heavy drinking yesterday, even though today I have so much to do and really needed to have a clear head.

I also, shamefully, have a very young baby and the guilt and deep deep shame is overwhelming.

Hello Everyone, checking in after an incredibly busy week at work.

Still AF My streak is only 17 days but I am near the 21 day first hurdle set and have signed up to Sober Spring on the Try Dry app.

The only time I think about a drink is when I pack my work stuff away and start thinking about what I am having for dinner. Once I open a can of diet coke instead, I don't really think of it at all throughout the evening. It's so weird to think I used to drink all evening, every evening.

I was reflecting on my sober Big Night Out last weekend. Nobody was bothered I wasn't drinking, but one of the group did ask me several times how long I was not drinking for, almost as though they wanted to check I wasn't going to become "one of them." They also asked me towards the end of the evening, when they were reeling and getting a bit aggressive, "It's really not as much fun is it when you aren't drinking?!"

This, despite the fact I had really enjoyed myself, been up dancing half the night, smiling and chatting with everyone. But he is only one person out of the 6, and maybe he finds other peoples sobriety threatening?

It's a beautiful sunny day here so I am off to the beach in a bit for a refreshing walk. Take care everyone.

@Cloudsinmytea Has anyone else noticed that when they started to become 'sober curious' their drinking got a thousand times worse?

Yes - absolutely that is what happened with me too.

@BrightonBunny looks like we both live in the same place 😍

Glad it's not just me but It's hard not to think I will be this way forever I pull off shit like this.

@Cloudsinmytea I am born and bred. So lucky to live here

@BrightonBunny same! We've moved out to Shoreham though recently as much more affordable x

@Blackberryblossom so nice to read your update. I'll carry your words with me this weekend 🙏💜

Checking in 🙌

Hello. Checking in. So much to catch up on, I haven't been on for a while. It's good to see people plugging away at the early days, and old hands dropping in with updates. Lovely to hear from you @Blackberryblossom, a fantastic milestone.

I'm interested in what was said upthread about sober curiosity coinciding with increased drinking. Looking back, I can see that I did this. December 2019 is just a blur. And I was conscious of it at the time, too. I thought of it as a last hurrah but I can see how the idea of an inner alcoholic clinging on, also works.

Totally there on the drinking more the more I didn’t want to drink. It’s self flagellation I think. The I’ll have just one, well I’ll have one more and make it a proper sized glass, then we’ll I’ve fucked it up now so I’ll finish the bottle.. and maybe start another…

41 days here.

500 sounds amazing and a new bike so well deserved!

Good sunny Sunday.
71 days, another af wine tried (Marks Muscat, sweet fizz). Not for me.
Husband out, so I did have the devil on my shoulder hence I put my pyjamas on early.
Went to bed to watch Midsommer marathon. OK this morning.

Checking in. Great to see everyone supporting and feeling supported.

I am moving towards the 20 month mark of being alcohol free and finding it just part of life now.

And now on day 20 of no sugar. It feels very similar to when I was at the beginning of AF actually.

I feel so good physically, not so many dips of energy and a real release of cravings.

This project I have going of doing one or two things each month is interesting and follows the same thought patterns as stopping drinking. Thoughts of how I moderate again when the month is over and how that it creeps up again, (see crisps) just like all the Dry Januarys I used to do. I am finding it fascinating.

And I am realising how much sugar is in everything. And how much our society is based around sugar. Sugar as a treat on a bad day, sugary treats to celebrate and sugary treats because, well why not? Sound familiar?

Anyway, I thought it may help those that are in the early stages who, like I did, are mainlining sugar to get through alcohol cravings. Keep at it, if it helps to not drink alcohol then go for it. It might feel like you will never be able to stop and will drown in a vat of sugar for the rest of your life but once the alcohol craving goes, then it is possible to address the sugar thing. I didn't think I could do that. A bit like how I thought I'd never be able to stop drinking.

Stopping drinking has given me so much self belief in myself. If I can do this then all possibilities in life are there for the taking.

I have a rare day off today and going to meet a good friend and take my son to the skate park.

Happy Sunday all.

Massive well done on your sugar free streak @Breathmiller, that’s impressive!

Thanks bunnies
The mumsnet that I gave up last month though has come back with a vengeance. Obviously moderation doesn't work for MN. 🤣

@Breathmiller 🤣🤣🤣

I radically cut down on sugar and carbs at the same time as I quit drinking (the two very much went together for me) and I do feel so much better for it. I do sometimes eat sweet things but now I do it much less often I also crave it far less often, need less of it, don’t have blood sugar scrashes etc. Sugar is probably the only thing on earth I am able to consume in moderation🤣🤣🤣

I love that stopping drinking has given you so much self belief Breath, that’s quite inspiring for me. However as yet No sugar moderation here! Although I have quit sugar before and might do it again when I am more settled into the non drinking but it would be too much now

Managed an extended family visit this afternoon, was a difficult one but I’ve survived didn’t even consider a drink at lunchtime in the pub and I feel ok now, although 2 months ago I would have cracked open the wine by now to drown my sorrows, family can be so difficult.

@AlloftheTime so good to see your update, sorry I've only just responded, it has been a helluva week!. How are things your end? How is your day to day? I find I am still very much 'one day at a time' mentality!