The freedom thread ( continued ) Riding the rollercoaster of an alcohol free life!

[Adm1010]

Hello all

This is a thread for people who have decided that life is much better without alcohol!🤩 These threads were started by @Drybird, and they have changed the lives of many people.

Some posters on these threads have been sober for a long time, and some are only just starting. We are a very friendly and inclusive bunch and we are always excited when someone new joins the thread. The only thing we ask is that our posters have given up alcohol completely. Talk of moderation can be triggering for some people, so this thread is not the right place for that (there are other moderation threads🙂).

We are a supportive welcoming bunch. No question is ever to “ silly “ and their is generally someone around if you are struggling

So just come here to chat or vent or check in . Whatever you need as you ride the rollercoaster of an alcohol free life

Thankyou to bunnies for hosting the last thread.
And here’s to the next 40 pages

@Fortheloveofgodwhy thank you and I'm going to try my hardest 💪♀️

@iamyourequal I will be on here every day from now on. Even if it's brief and just a hello and a check in. I need the accountability and support. I have let you and the group down again, and you are just wanting to lift me up and have been so generous with your time responding 💜 .

@Veryverycalmnow welcome 🙌

@AlloftheTime how are you feeling this morning? How was last night in hospital? You have been so poorly and so courageous on here to boot! And I've missed it all because I've been spiraling and having to recover during the week by mostly going to bed at 7pm. Not catching up on the thread, just surviving AGAIN. Your advise and support means the world and I am inspired by so much of what you've posted.

So In the words of someone much further on their sober journey and someone far more confident then they actually feel......Let's show this week who's boss! 💪♀️

Day two 🙌

The 7pm booze dash didn't exist for me as I always had "my" wine in the house, or if I'd decided to be good and not have it in the house and then wanted it, I'd order it from Amazon (next day) or I'd walk all of 6m across the road to the shop or even order it for a lot more money via Delieroo... It is so accessible.

I will admit I am really enjoying the not thinking about booze, when I am drinking it takes up a lot of head space? I really am quite obsessed with it. It also has such a domino effect. Once I decide to drink I am lazy and greedy with food (I feed the kids decently but will order in something for myself or have a massive dinner / seconds etc). The scary thing for me, is how the decision to drink could be made in a split second, for any number of non reasons, and that was it. It could happen at 10am and whilst I wouldn't drink until 6.30pm (never before - I had very strict rules!!) once I'd decided to drink that night / weekend / week it could not be undone.

I feel a wee bit fraudulent speaking is the past tense about drinking, but I am 28 days AF now, so it is the past!!!

I have had to be very boring in the first few weeks and other than seeing friends (on a few occasions) in the daytime, I have not done much socially. Yesterday we went to my in-laws for dinner. MIL is a brilliant hostess and a lovely woman - she always takes the kids off my hands, plies with food and wine, lets me kick back for a few hours etc. Its very rare not to drink at their house (they aren't big drinkers but MIL and I always share a bottle)... What she doesn't know is I then go home and buy another bottle. I cannot moderate.

MIL finished an open bottle yesterday, just two glasses, I was offered. I kind of shut it down though. I am actually on AB for my wisdom tooth - they probably all think I am pregnant

I still cannot envisage getting to a point when I can socialise properly without a drink? Not that I socialise much as a 42yo mother of 3 who is on her own at the moment.

@Crunchymum can relate to everything you have said so much, like are you actually me! Same regards not drinking untill evening, 7pm as well. I can not moderate and do exactly what you've said you did at the in-laws too.

Your doing really well and I think at this stage we just have to think of one day at a time and not future events untill they rear their heads in the forefront. I've been months sober and gone to the pub thinking I could go af drink wise and within half an hour had destroyed all hope of that and my nearly three month sobriety.

Maybe we will never be able to go to the pub again, or maybe it is just too soon and that we are the sort of people who need at least 6 months under the belt before attempting a pub or club/part environment 🤷

@SavBbunny yes that urgent 'cabbage'. It often took some really imaginative thinking to find an excuse to go out.

As you say @Crunchymum it is quite a relief not to always be thinking about it, and making plans around wine. I was also the type that wouldn't drink until the evening (7pm for me). I would never have been the type to drink a bank holiday away in the pub garden, but equally having just one night off was a massive achievement.

Thanks for the warm welcome- glad to hear others share(d) similar feelings and yes, I also did the 7pm dash if I had resisted during the daytime shop. I definitely agree with the domino effect!

Whoop whoop I am out. Home and in bed albeit the wrong side 🤣. Multiple opportunities to say ‘I don’t drink’ so that was a perk. Also no fear of mixing pain killers and alcohol. Last op I was too f*cked to drink anyway and too high on tramadol. This time I am giving my liver the best chance to sort out the anaesthetic and pain killers without the added overhead of detoxing alcohol. Hope you all have had a good day

@AlloftheTime are you out yet?

I was no longer on the 7pm dash, last few years I’ve kept the ‘cellar’ well stocked!! Clearly this has not helped my moderation attempts …

@Fortheloveofgodwhy that’s fab! Get a good nights kip.

Still in and will be for a few days - high infection markers I think he said. No beds on designated ward yet. I’ve resigned myself and doing my best to go with it all. This is my fourth night so I think I’m institutionalised in the way that happens!
Well done if you’ve done another AF day.
Hello newbies
@ChampooPapi I’m waving 👋🏾 and even more in awe of you after seeing how hard everyone works to make the NHS what it is

🙋 back @AlloftheTime , glad you've recognised that Stockholm syndrome may be playing a part in your compliance, we've got you where we want you 😂.

On a serious note I hope you do get some sleep, it's can be so blumin noisy in a hospital. Have you been using headphones and podcasting? That can help drown out the annoying beeping of all things machine!

Glad you are home @Fortheloveofgodwhy Hope you get a good night. Must have been so satisfying announcing your weekly units as zero!

Hope you get a good night too @AlloftheTime Institutionalised is the perfect description.

Morning all.
Off to have my drinkers veins zapped this morning.
Met a lady yesterday for coffee who had clearly had a few drinks by 10.15. I wanted to help but clearly I couldn't.

Morning all.

@SavBbunny that sounds really interesting. I have lots around my nose. Let us know how it goes.

Morning all. I've had a blip. Not sure where it came from but it was gross and I have suffered terribly - poisoning myself so I am dusting myself off and getting on. I'm holding your hand @ChampooPapi

@Borrowbox @iamyourequal and others
Feeling good after 4hours sleep 😊
Forgotten name but someone was going in for a
procedure today - thinking of you

@ChampooPapi you did make me laugh I’m just too compliant aren’t I?
Slept for four hours last night so feel better for that. Good advice- hadn’t thought about podcasts. I used eye mask and one ear plug 😀No visitors but getting a bag dropped off later and son had suggested putting headphones in so hope he remembers
Have a good day all 👍

Glad to see you feeling good @allofthetime 4 hours sleep before hospital would be pretty rubbish, but in there is probably as good as it gets. Hope today is a good day.

Don't be hard on yourself @Kindtomyself You are back and that is all that matters. I doubt anyone has given up successfully without a blip.

Thinking of you @kindtomyself

@Kindtomyself good for you for posting and sorry if you are feeling rubbish
Get back on it and keep looking forward. At the end of today you be another step along the road 💐

@Kindtomyself holding it back, tightly 😞.

Today is awful back at the hospital, but not because of anyone or anything, but because of me 🙄. My head, the fatigue, Jesus I feel like death warmed up.

@Kindtomyself thank goodness we came back to the thread though, imagine if we didn't? These first few weeks post relapse is so hard without the support or accountability. Are you home or out today? Each minute is a minute closure to bed, that's how I'm working it today!

Just quickly popping on the send strength to @Kindtomyself and anyone else who might need it. Hang in there!

Night all
My lesson from today - there is a fine line between avoiding a trip hazard and losing your slippers under a hospital bed 🤦‍♀️

Sav was it you who did the cabbage dash? I need to know if you actually bought one every time and was it always cooked devoured?

Hope you get your slippers back @AlloftheTime I left my ipad charger on a ward in my hurry to get away. They must find all sorts! Hope you get a good night's sleep.

Hope you are both doing OK @champooPapi and @kindtomyself

Pleased to read you see holding up @AlloftheTime. And glad your op went well @Fortheloveofgodwhy.
Oh @Kindtomyself. Join the blip club. What is with March?!! Listen you are back now and ready to go again and that’s all that matters. Are you feeling any better now? We are all here and understand.

I agree 100% with Rosiesun. ()

Morning all. Thanks for your kind messages, in some weird way I'm grateful for the reminder of how absolutely disgusting alcohol is. I definitely poisoned my body and it didn't like it one bit. I still feel a bit fragile but onwards and upwards.

The support in this thread is phenomenal what an amazing bunch of people we are (I've included myself in there you may have noticed ). You're so right @ChampooPapi god knows where I'd be without this thread.

Hope you're starting to feel better @ChampooPapi - you've got this - you sound as though you are beating yourself up a little and if you are please don't. Remember to treat yourself like you would a very good friend. You've been very kind to me about my blip but hard on yourself.

@AlloftheTime I hope you are on the mend- sounds really nasty. Did you get an ok sleep? How long will you be in there?

@Fortheloveofgodwhy well done on getting through the procedure, your accident sounds horrible.

Hello to everyone else, I'm going to message on here daily to be more aware

Quick check in!

Not read back but I’ll try and catch up later on . Things just manic at the minute but staying sober!! 😊

Have a good day all x

Quite stressful here at the moment.

Eldest has a cough and is meant to be away for a trip this weekend so the race is on to get a PCR / make sure they are okay to attend etc.

Youngest has an urgent ultrasound due to raised lymph nodes in her neck. She's had extensive blood tests which were all clear and an xray so they say it's "probably nothing" but I'm pretty wound up.

Usually this would be a prime excuse to drink. But I know that would just add to my stress levels and make it harder for me to cope!!