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Alcohol support

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Day 1

1000 replies

moochies · 26/12/2021 16:48

I posted another thread earlier about my disaster of a Christmas Day.

I just can't do it anymore, looking into the future I can see myself losing everything, my DH, friends, family. I was considering taking myself to a&e this morning because I was such a mess.

I'm absolutely determined to do it this time, so this is day 1.

Please join me.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
11
Easterdaffsx · 29/03/2022 21:20

Hi
Can I join please ?
Not sure if this thread is just for those completely abstaining .... if so please feel free to boot me off !
There used to be on relationships but can't seem to find it .

Today is day 2 for me of not drinking in the week . Quite a challenge for me and looking to join a group on here for mutual support .
You all sound so committed with some great tips .
This evening was fine for me as was last night .... I think !
The thought on the way home was pants though !

teaandtoastwithmarmite · 29/03/2022 22:41

@Easterdaffsx welcome! I've completely abstained but others on here are cutting back or having a couple of months off

Haveatakeaway · 01/04/2022 20:20

@teaandtoastwithmarmite hiya sorry I've been off the radar. I am officially one week sober. I spectacularly fell off the wagon last Friday. I put myself in an incredibly dangerous state.
7 days later I am still covered in bruises. I was shouted at by a pub landlady that I know because I walked from one pub with a drink I'd bought in there, to her pub. I remember crying and apologising profusely. I also remember my so called friends (just people that I see out that like to get as wankered as me) just watching, and no-one asking if I was ok. I decided to walk to my bil's house, didn't even know where it was, climbing over walls into gardens, knocked on a flat door I thought was someone I know, understandably they were furious, I went round the block, tried another door and it was this random same man again! The fucking shame of it. Eventually did find Bil, woke up his house mate who was asleep and shouted at me, again I remember apologising. Bil walked me home (it was about 3am at this point). Many, many blank gaps of memory. Decided to check my phone the next day and there was an Instagram message from someone I barely know, saying I was crying outside her house and she was furious I woke her son up. I haven't turned my phone on since. I haven't left the house and I've been having about three hours broken sleep a night. I don't want to know what else I've done. I had to cancel my smear as I couldn't bare the nurse seeing my cut and bruised legs. I have never, ever been in such a state. I'm absolutely mortified and so, so ashamed. That is not the person I am. I don't want my husband to go out as there are so many blanks, I'm dreading someone saying 'oh god, your wife was such a state, she did this and that' whatever. I've told him everything I remember, he said I'm a dickhead but gave me a hug. He was comforting ME, while looking after our children and having his health problem. I don't deserve him. The next day he came back with a bag of mothers day presents for me, like I fucking deserve it!

What a wake up call. My mum asked if I'd hit rock bottom and I said there's always lower you can go. I even emailed the Samaritans on Sunday (I wasn't going to hurt myself, I wouldn't do that to my family, I just literally didn't know what to do with myself and my panic attacks have been almost constant). I have zero intention of ever drinking again. I'm so angry at myself. I honestly can't believe that it's me writing this.

I'm still on my ass a week later. Every time the house phone rings I've been running away shouting 'I'm not here ', I keep compulsively checking the windows throughout the night, a lot of my OCD symptoms have returned, if the doorbell rings I've literally been jumping out of my seat. I feel very vulnerable.
I'm back on my sober apps, reading quit lit and back to this thread. The only thing I can do is give it my all now, but at the minute the thought of having a drink or being out of control terrifies me. I just still can't believe this happened.

Bizzywater · 03/04/2022 10:49

@Haveatakeaway that sounds really hard. How are you today ? C

Haveatakeaway · 03/04/2022 16:37

@Bizzywater I'm ok, feeling stronger everyday but still bruised, vulnerable and awful insomnia. I've honestly never been in such a state in my life. It's frightening. 9 days sober today.
How have you been getting on? X

Bizzywater · 03/04/2022 19:39

Not good. Been having a rough time and ended up drinking again. I don't know where my willpower has gone

Haveatakeaway · 03/04/2022 20:55

@bizzywater I'm sorry you're having a hard time. I found myself creeping up slowly again, just having a few beers at home when I never drink at home to ending up within three weeks in the state I was last week. I obviously thought changing my location would change my drinking habits. Nope. Anywhere alcohol is involved I can't stop, so I can't start and I have to accept that.

The fact that you're acknowledging drink isn't making you happy and you're trying to do something about it is incredibly brave and also depressing. I think everyone is commendable for owning our struggles on this thread, which is one of the hardest things to do. I've also told my closest three family members and it feels kind of freeing.
Always happy to listen if you need to talk.

teaandtoastwithmarmite · 04/04/2022 19:17

Hi guys. Sorry to hear you've had a bad time. How you feeling now?

Haveatakeaway · 05/04/2022 10:05

Feeling stronger everyday @teaandtoastwithmarmite sleep still crap but I've been here before and got through it and I will get through it again. My Dh went to play darts in the pub the landlady shouted at me in last night and I was dreading it thinking 'omg what will people say to him?!' and she apologised to him for shouting at me and said SHE was really drunk Confused (she normally is so it's not unusual).

I'm actually surprising myself, I have spent my whole life worrying about what people think of me, and now I'm learning to not give a shit (family aside). Why do I care what other drunk people think of me that I see once a month? I've apologised to those I needed too, accepted and been vocal about the fact I have a problem with alcohol, and am working to change my future. I can't change the past, I've learnt from it though. Half of these people are functioning alcoholics, I in no way judge them but at the same time I'm learning to be kinder to myself. I'm not a bad or horrible person and neither are they.

How's the drumming going? Had any more sober outings? Brew

Rupertpenrysmistress · 05/04/2022 16:26

Hi all can I join? I can relate to so many of these stories. Particularly yours takeaway I still cringe about my behaviour. I HAD to quit, I couldn't moderate sadly.

I have spent alot of time being kind to myself and just taking care of me. I am no longer horrible to myself but, try to frame things in a positive light. I know this sounds self indulgent but, my family have benefitted from my sobriety.

I feel a bit strange and lost today, I am 86 days sober and feel rather sad that I cannot drink again. I have been ok up until now. I currently have covid so not sure if it's that.

Just know, you are all doing so well on here, it's not how many times you fall, it's how you get yourself up. Be kind and protect your sobriety. The benefits are worth it but, it is fragile.

Haveatakeaway · 05/04/2022 21:18

Hi @Rupertpenrysmistress I wrote you a massive reply and lost it. You're nearly at the 90 day mark! That's amazing! I hope I can do that well (and beyond)! Strange to think that I was teetotal easily for years until I got to about 28.
Do you think you're romanticising drinking? I'm still terrified of being that out of control again at the minute. But I know how easy it creeps up on me, over stupid stuff. Like, why would it be better sitting in the garden when it gets to summer with a g&t or cold cider? it's like learning to undrink isn't it.

I don't think you sound self indulgent at all! I think you're doing the hardest thing which is giving your sobriety your full attention. It would be much easier to open a bottle. Flowers

Bizzywater · 05/04/2022 21:23

Sounds really positive @Haveatakeaway
Had an awful day at work today but made a nice dinner and had a bath. Another rubbish day coming up tomorrow but pleased I'll be able to focus without a bad head. Halo

Bizzywater · 05/04/2022 21:23

Welcome @Easterdaffsx and @Rupertpenrysmistress

Rupertpenrysmistress · 05/04/2022 21:41

Hi Bizzywater you are so right bad days are made so much worse with a hangover, not always easy to believe the night before.

I may be romanticising the drinking haveatakeaway it's just that, it is everywhere I look. When I imagine drinking a glass of wine it honestly makes me feel sick. The thing is the buzz only really lasts for one glass then it is gone. The problem is we think we can keep chasing it.

I think I am just bored. DH still drinks and that is fine although, he did get really annoying the other night, I just thought to myself, god I used to be like that, but more regularly.

Does anyone watch EastEnders I am really cringing at Linda's story. I also have DC and that is why I cannot drink. One day at a time. Hope everyone has a restful sleep.

Haveatakeaway · 06/04/2022 06:49

Morning everyone! I hope you all have the best day you can!
I practically slept through the whole night Shock

I get bored too @Rupertpenrysmistress I'm currently rewatching breaking bad, reading quit lit, (at the minute I'm re-reading a piece of cake by cupcake brown) and my son has to make a minute a miniature garden for school and I'm way too invested Blush making tiny tomatoes and carrots out of polymer clay. Today I'm building the greenhouse with cocktail sticks and cling film and the cabbages and tiny flowers.
Yeah, drunk people are really annoying too. If my dh and mum decide to have a drink together (which is fine, They know when to stop but do get tipsy) I go to bed at about half eight.

I sometimes think it's something to do with the anticipation of 'I'm going to get a drink!' I don't drink at home or keep alcohol in the house so I get to put on make-up and nicer clothes then my day to day. Even just for a pint at the little old man's pub I like. The first sip, great but after four plus drinks, who knows what's bloody going on?!

I haven't watched eastenders for ages, is it a drinking storyline?
Does anyone here have parents that have alcohol problems? My dad is exactly like me, or I'm exactly like him, and I'm extremely conscious of breaking the chain for my children.
@bizzywater you got this 💪

teaandtoastwithmarmite · 06/04/2022 22:55

@Haveatakeaway
Yes you can do it. One thing about you is that you are very strong and keep going every time so remember that

How's the drumming going? Had any more sober outings?

Loving the drumming thanks. It is getting harder now but it's good to have a challenge. Yes we went to a family party. Think I may have mentioned that. Also went to see a band last week and DH came back with a pint for him but they'd run out of the alcohol free. I could've had a swig of his pint but I resisted. Got another family party on Saturday and we're staying overnight so that will be a real challenge. Wish me luck! 15 weeks on Sunday

teaandtoastwithmarmite · 06/04/2022 22:57

Welcome @Rupertpenrysmistress you're doing really well

Good to hear from you too @Bizzywater

Haveatakeaway · 07/04/2022 12:45

Afternoon guys. How are you all doing? I've finished the miniature garden and I'm embarrassingly proud of it. The greenhouse failed, so now we have an eco pod Grin I want to make loads more tiny things now.

teaandtoastwithmarmite · 07/04/2022 21:02

Aww that sounds lovely. I'm feeling a bit rubbish like heartburn with pain in my arm. Going to go to bed early. Carry on making the miniature things and post pictures Smile

Haveatakeaway · 07/04/2022 22:16

I hope you're ok @teaandtoastwithmarmite keep me updated Flowers

Day 1
Day 1
Haveatakeaway · 07/04/2022 22:18

Oh god those pictures are awful Blush I'll try and get some better ones tomorrow 😂

Haveatakeaway · 09/04/2022 08:19

I won! Urrm...I mean my son won, obviously 😂 so happy for him.
How's everyone doing? Any nice plans today?

It's my youngest boys birthday tomorrow, he wants to go bowling, if we do it will be my second sober outing. With my agoraphobia this is hard so a pint with bowling always made it easier. I can take my diazepam, then I literally can't drink, but I don't wanna be running back and forth to the car every five minutes if I'm panicking, and I don't want to not go obviously. When this has happened before, I've told the kids it's my bad back that means I need to go and sit in the car. I think my best bet is to give it a go I guess Confused

I also need to source a spider man cake today as asda substituted for a batman one. I asked if he wanted a batman one, and he doesn't so I sent it back. If all else fails I'll get a plain one and some icing and use my new found amazing skills to model a spider man 😂

What a ramble. Anyway, day 15 here and no cravings yet but I'm ready for them when they come. Brew

Haveatakeaway · 09/04/2022 08:22

I forgot to ask how you're feeling aswell @teaandtoastwithmarmite. I really hope you're alright Flowers

Easterdaffsx · 09/04/2022 08:59

How's everyone doing ?
Honestly had the most awful week at work . I mean truly gut wrenchingly horrible and I ended up drinking . Not lots but I broke my no alcohol in the week pact .
Monday is a new day and actually looking forward to those evenings which stretch out more without the wine . The clear skin amd the flatter tummy !
Also doing the Fast 800 Mon to Thursday so will be visibly twitching by the end of next week !

Loving the miniature garden someone has posted . I'm looking to making some sort of Fairy Garden in the garden for DD (and me !)

teaandtoastwithmarmite · 09/04/2022 11:13

@Easterdaffsx onwards and upwards!

@Haveatakeaway thank you I am ok. I think it's a combination of too many hot cross buns and no gym all week! Still not had a drink. Family party tonight and staying over. Wish me luck!

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