Wankerbastards move to 2020. With moderatin' a plenty. We rage against flouncers, strops and teens, and of dryness we have big dreams. We want teacups not fuckups!

[Frouby]

Thread 9 for the tryers to be dryers. Join us if you want some support to reduce alcohol. All welcome for support, laughs and moderating.

Will tag a few peoples name I can spell as I am useless at clicky links.

@flossie
@madameforest
@longestlurkerever
@dionoysa
@waterandlemonjuice

Not planning on being AF. Dds overtired and irritating, and i have prospect of 4 of them for rest of week

I never think it’s daft to contemplate something that will make you happier longest. I think work is such a huge part of life that satisfaction is as good as money. I appreciate that’s easier in the cheap north than expensive London, but don’t rule it out.
It’s whether job satisfaction makes up for the hassle. In a dream world, you’d have the job you love, with the flexibility to be the mum you want to be, on the right money, but it’s a Venn diagram.

It is very hard with DS1. This winter has been the worst ever. A real downward spiral. But yes, crocuses are out. Hopefully the skate park will dry out soon and he’ll get back to college. Either of those things would be a huge boost to him.

I am very much not AF. But I know/hope you won’t judge.
I appreciate you guys so much ❤️

God, NC4, I promise I will never, ever judge. But I do wish I could give you a hug.

Have been to a b'day party in a pub, and am about 1.5 bottles of wine down. No excuse. Ended up spending even more money on a taxi home with DS (who was also at the party).

So a complete fail in every regard.

FML.

NC4, I promise you haven’t fucked up and I promise your boys want time with you even if they pretend they don’t and it probably is this hard for a lot of people. We definitely don’t judge on this thread, not at all.

Longest, sorry your kids are being tricky too. I bet conversation with boss will be ok. She’s only human (presumably 😂)

Dion, I’m more than that down.

Drank shitloads at dinner party but wasn’t at all drunk which should probably make me feel bad. hostess drank more and was shitfaced. Other guests weren’t annoying but were a massive clique so quite hard work, they’ve all known each other for years so it was a bit tricky but ok. After my shitty year last year I’m definitely less confident socially and I’m generally an extrovert. I blushed when asked about my job fgs. So I feel a bit embarrassed about that. They were all v senior professional woman, as am I, ostensibly but I don’t feel it Atm.

Oh guys, nothing but love here. I am feeling it a bit this morning too. Where was my resolve to stick to a glass? Wasn't even at a party so no excuse. Dion i hope you had fun partying with ds.

Water, i hear you. My friends are all now partners in law firms etc and arguably i am at a similar level but i don't think they see it that way and tbh it's kind of obvious why as i don't really have the same lifestyle.

Am thinking i will apply for dream job though. The lack of flexibility is the massive downside but it's working with the judiciary and they have court recess so it's possible i could negotiate something around school holidays, which might in some ways make more sense than having time off after school each day to dish up snacks while they watch telly. Omg they want a lot of bang for their buck though. Is "head of legal" job at Royal Courts of Justice on my same middle management public sector salary.

Am off today, minding dd2 and pal. Dd1 has her workshop which i accidentally booked for today instead of monday but she "definitely" wants to go as "it was so much fun" so am really pleased about that.

Is only four hours though so may head into central London if dd2's friend has been picked up by then. There's a thing at the British library they might enjoy.

Tomorrow i have four of them and may attempt an outing to Kew or the transport museum, which i can take them into for free, or i may wuss out and throw money at bowling or soft play. Trusty cheap cinema has let me down by showing nothing suitable.

Morning all

NC hopefully spring is just around the corner and he will be able to get out with his friends again. And hopefully he will get back to college or on an apprenticeship of some sort. Have a look at OU, they do all kinds of courses and many are free to do, something like that in something that interests him may help.

dion myy dd is being a pita as well. She's all arsey and stroppy and just generally difficult to be with. Shes been awful to ds this holiday as well. We are going to Ikea Saturday morning and I am so glad she is in school as all 4 of us together is just awful. She's arsey to DH and mean to ds then turns on the waterworks when I pull her on it.

longest apply for the dream job. Just do it. Worry about the small print later.

Have just got home from a 3 hour shopping trips with both dcs. Jesus fuck. It's hard work. But have got everything I need so that I don't have to go in another shop at all until at least Monday. Ds bought lego from his left over Christmas money so he can sit and do that while I get some more deep cleaning done. What joy.

Don't think I will be dry tonight. Dd wants to go dragonboat training but I have told her I don't want her going. It's freezing cold, windy and bloody pitch black on the lake and I worry about what would happen if they capsized. She's stroppy about it. But have also asked her to clean the bathroom and if that doesn't get done she's definitely not going.

Well. It's going downhill fast here. DS1 has just been told he isn't suitable for the traineeship he thought he was starting next week. I've rung them and it looks like a communication issue but they are adamant the course isn't right for him and would be setting him up to fail.
Kick a lad when he's down, much?

Sorry to hear about DDs acting up. I haven't had the pleasure of parenting teenage girls but from what I remember of being one it looks like a challenge.

I'm in the 1.5 bottles last night too. I don't feel hungover, just fat and miserable. I see my fab PT tonight though, so he'll be kind and get me back on track.

Thats shit NC have they come up with any alternatives for him? Why isn't he suitable? Does he need to do a course or improve on something like a GCSE?

Am fooked. Just took my sectional sofas to bits, cleaned the mechanisms underneath for the recliners that were absolutely fucking filthy and swapped the most used ends around. And then scrubbed it by hand. Then did all skirting boards and paint work, pulled all rest of furniture out and hoovered and mopped, cleaned cabinet of doom off and found a billionty nerf darts and bits of lego. Fml.

Sick of fecking cleaning now. It's nice to have a bit of time without having to knock off for school run etc but it's very boring.

Oh NC4 that's totally shit! Poor ds! Can they even withdraw an offer like that?

Frouby i am exhausted just reading that. You are so good keeping on top of house stuff. I feel like such a slob in comparison. Dd2's friend said "you have a house and i have a flat but your house looks very old" which i don't think was referring to the Victorian architecture but i couldn't really argue. Fml. One of the kids has cried off tomorrow though and the other isn't coming till 2pm. Bonus.

I have had a fairly boring day. Small kids were fine and dd1 enjoyed her workshop but neither of them cba going into town. I let them do a bit of jazz cooking so dd1 has made curry and dd2 something resembling brownies with strawberries in? DH and i are having pate and salad because i have run out of carb free ideas and cba.

I have booked mil's birthday present to dh and me, which is lovely but took an age, and i had chat with scary boss plus made a half hearted start on application. Didn't even get an interview for sideways move Edinburgh job i didn't want so a bit put off, but i didn't exactly put loads of effort into it.

AF tonight. Dunno yet whether dh is out.

Well, I can't figure out if he's misunderstood what they told him Longest. It's strange.

Where have you booked for your trip? I'm planning AF tonight too. Can't keep caning wine every night. FML

Lisbon, NC4. Have never been.

Oh NC4, that is horrible. I'm so sorry. Just when you both needed some good news, too. I hope the PT took your mind off it slightly, even if just for an hour or so. God, it's hard being a parent.

Agree with Frouby about the job, Longest. See what happens, and worry about it when you get it.

I'm afraid I'm in the 'no cleaning' camp.

I'm also in the 'no AF' camp. FML. Had been going to try for AF tonight, but DP then suggested going out for a drink.

Nc4 so sorry about DS1 there will be something he can do don't despair. He has an excellent role model in you.
Longest go for the job
Not sure partnerships are always worth it. My lawyer friend never regretted NOT being a partner in the end, there might be a lack of recognition but there are a lot of benefits being an employee.
Water don't put yourself down. I used to have a good job and apart from the teaching for a pittance I'm now a cleaner, gardener, pool technicien and laundry person no kudos at all but I'm happier.

😂😂😂I'm so pleased there isn't much AF going on this week, it makes me feel less guilty! No teenage DD she is in France still having lessons at Uni but I'm in the UK staying with my stubborn DD so it is hard not to have a glass or 2 of wine in the evening. Am managing my 10 mile run along the canal every morning but it's a bit boring compared to France where I can run anywhere except the motorways easily. There is so much traffic here even in the countryside!
Funeral all organised (I am good at that sort of stuff), for next Wednesday. My mother was much loved and I think there will be a lot of people to see her off.

Madame really sorry about your mum. No matter how old you are you are never ready.
Really need to take myself in hand.
Lent starts next week so may go with that.

I hope it's some comfort that your mum was well loved mme. Will be thinking of you this week. Not sure i knew you had another daughter.

Was AF last night even though dh had 2 x whisky. Proud. Off to pub tonight with friends though.

Nc4, still thinking of you and poor ds. Really hope it works out for him.

NC4 I’m sorry about ds

Madame thinking of you this week and thank you for the kind words re the dinner party, you’re right.

Longest sorry you didn’t get an interview, fuck ‘em I say! A friend sent me a t towel with those words on it and it’s the one I use the most.

Hi accidentalaccountant, welcome back. I’m starting next week seriously so join me if you like.

I’ve not been AF for about 199 years, it feels like. Almost looking forward to next week and starting an AF stint. Will do at least 2 weeks I think. Drank wine last night, will be tonight, I’m cooking a roast chicken later.

Dd has a boy around, eek! They’ve been talking online for ages but this is the first time they’ve met. He took a train and several buses to get here and it took him 2.5 hours so I’m not sure how sustainable it is but hey... Dh is noisily doing work in the bathroom next to her room 😂 where they are watching a film and eating pizza.

I’m now 2 weeks into HRT and have stopped the progesterone so my period has started, not sure if that’s good or not tbh. I’m hoping I’ll feel less bloated and hormonal as a result. Deep joy.

I may have also just noisily done some washing and clanging about in the utility room, which is under her room. 😂

Lol at the noisy parenting Water 😂 It’s better than coming downstairs to find random shoes in the hall (although I didn’t actually mind the pink trainers). Is he still there?

AF tonight. It’s been the booziest week of the year - since Christmas. I’m also looking forward to a good stretch of eating well, exercising and not drinking.

I might go to bed in a bit. I’ve just watched Kevin & Perry Go Large with DS2. He thought it was hilarious. I need to think of some other TV/films to watch with him. Any suggestions?

Drop Dead Fred is funny NC. And the first inbetweeners. American Pie depending how old he is. The Goonies is amazing.

I've just watched the first episode of Hunters I think it's called. Was quite good and will probably give the second episode a chance. Think it's on Amazon prime.

Not dry here. Been to Ikea, built 2 kallax and rearranged my hallway. Definetly deserved a beer after that I thought. 3 or 4 beers and a large glass of wine but drunk over the whole afternoon.

Desperately need a good dry spell. Can do right through to Wednesday at least I reckon, maybe even Thursday. Need no beer and some healthy food and some serious exercise. Feel fat and flabby and really unfit.

Going to visit auntie tomorrow, then make roast chicken dinner, have a long soak in the bath and an early night. Got loads done this halfterm in the house but haven't done much normal cleaning so want to get that done tomorrow ready for monday and a fresh start.

Withnail and I? Is he too young? I can't wait to watch that with dd. Monty python's life of Brian?

Not in the least af. Missed paek run because I was arguing with dh, but things cheered up a bit after that. Sun came out and took dc out for curry and a mooch around Camden market, which is always fun if rammed. Bought silly charity shop junk so they have been printing their own chocolate coins and jelly gummy bears. Did a bit of work on application for dream but underpaid job. Thought i was nearly done until i found part 2: 750 word essay on technical skills, fml.

Noticed next door's chimney is lethally damaged and bricks are sliding down the roof. Their chimney pot has already smashed on to my patio. Dunno what to do as haven't seen them in ages: knocked on the door and posted a note through bit no reply.

Went out for drinks with friends last night, which was nice, though one of their dads is dying so some sobering chat. Trying to sort a camping trip together which was fun last year.

Eek re internet boyfriend water! Has he left now? Quite sweet of him to make the journey though.

Oh and the back to the future trilogy. Classics!

Lol i just found this arty shot of my beautiful dd1 on my phone! She's been doing matisse style portraits at school

NC4 what about Sean of the dead or Hot Fuzz? Some strong language but v funny

Longest, 750 words? You could bang it out in a text I reckon 😂😂😂

Frouby, hope visit with aunty is ok. You’re an inspiration, cleaning wise. I realised today that the downstairs loo has LOADS of cobwebs behind it, I mean tonnes, the sort that men probably see but women don’t because they’re sitting down. My house is degenerating as cleaner has left and I can’t justify another one

Boy had roast chicken with us, seemed fine, I quite liked him and then he left at 8.30. Dh is fucking grumpy about it and so we’ve argued this evening, not ostensibly about that but it’s definitely pissed him off. Obviously I’m not AF. I may take off for a few days in Feb, alone, just to think. in the 90s they’d have called it a retreat, I might consider it a deserved break.

🙂 at your dd Longest!