Wankerbastards move to 2020. With moderatin' a plenty. We rage against flouncers, strops and teens, and of dryness we have big dreams. We want teacups not fuckups!

[Frouby]

Thread 9 for the tryers to be dryers. Join us if you want some support to reduce alcohol. All welcome for support, laughs and moderating.

Will tag a few peoples name I can spell as I am useless at clicky links.

@flossie
@madameforest
@longestlurkerever
@dionoysa
@waterandlemonjuice

Mme Fucksake, Brexit is TONIGHT. Honestly can't believe I am so calm about it, i have spent literally years mourning this day. It has totally ruined my mental health and optimism about the future. And yet here we are, and it'll be a damp squib. We'll never really know what the alternative would have been. But it feels like it deserves some kind of mark of respect. And all i can think to do is get shitfaced quite honestly, though have put it in fh's hands and told him to fetch me a nabby state "at least".

Spent the day half heartedly working, half heartedly applying for Edinburgh job and half heartedly trying to book somewhere to celebrate our 40ths, though this prompted friend to offer his lavish country pile for a group getaway so may do that.

Dh has arrived with nanny state and whisky. Fucksake.

Firework bastards is all I have to say. So we’re out? But there’s still nothing firm. It all feels very vulnerable.
My plan is to just carry on. On a day to day personal level I doubt it will make much difference. On a wider, ideological and sociological level.... well I’m very gutted.

Yes, we are in the implementation period so it's business as usual except we are rule takers with no actual say in how they are made, till December (unless extended) After that is all up for grabs but in many ways no deal is back on the table. I did not sleep well. May go on an ikea run in protest!

We had one lone firework wanker!

Kids are annoying me as well, being grabby and materialistic the whole time. Think i have spoiled them. So have dragged them to park where it's blowing a gale. May take them swimming later if they play their cards right. Am babysitting for a friend tonight so will be AF.

Jesus fuck. Prom dress shopping done thank fuck.

Wasn't as traumatic as I first thought it would be. Settled on a dress that was more expensive than I wanted to pay, but less than dd wanted to spend. It's quite simple but very, very flattering on her and looked loads better than the princessy ones she tried on. She looks about 19 in it though, not 15.

Have collapsed on sofa with a beer and that's where I am staying.

Oh NC4 it’s ds2, sorry for casting aspersions re weed!

Dionysa sorry there’s loads going on and it’s all grim

Madame sorry about your DM too.

Longest I’m pissed off about Brexit too, it’s all grim, grim, grim

Frouby, we also have a prom dress! It’s stunning and she looks amazing in it. It is princessy and was ahem, £280, ouch. It’s not dissimilar to the dress Phoebe Waller-Bridge was wearing in that great photo of her with a martini and a cigarette. It needs altering so we’ll go back in a week or two.

Now I’m on the sofa with a real fire and about to read the paper. We had a good fun night out with friends last night but didn’t get home until 1.15am. Drank but wasn’t drunk and had a great time. But definitely feel a bit jaded as a result today. Will be drinking tonight as dh is cooking roast chicken.

Ours was £250 plus at least £30 of alterations. Fml. She has now decided she doesn't like it. Told her tough, it's had half paid for and is in order. She's worrying about her underwear etc. Told her we will get spanx and tit tape and strap her in if necessary 😂😂😂. Her annoying best friend has said she liked one of the others better. Best friend has a tendency to be a bitch and said to ignore her as she's probably pissed off she is wearing her sisters handmedown dress. Nothing wrong with that of course but friend is a bit of a cow sometimes.

Switching to wine to fortify me through this angst 💃

Glad you got the prom dress sorted Frouby! sounds like a nightmare, I hate shopping.
Water thanks, I spoke to DM today, she can't get hold of how to use a mobile phone at all, but when we finally got around to speaking she said she loved her stay in the hospital, food great, nurses great, other patients great, it was a winter break for her Enjoy your roast chicken.
Dion I hope you are OK
Longest did you get to the pool? I managed to, not many people there early afternoon and did 2200m without having to overtake or be overtaken by anyone.
Off out to dinner with friends now, I'm driving so will be AF, or just one glass.

Glad you both got the dresses sorted but ouch at the prices! They sound gorgeous though.

Yes, went to the pool but the fun one with waves and slides so not much swimming as such. Did the park run this morning though and will attempt to sneak off to the lido tomorrow. Kids have also calmed down, they are decorating mugs for mother's and father's day presents. Hopefully i have redeemed myself with the swimming and won't get devil horns on mine.

Glad your mum enjoyed her stay mme! Mine was a nightmare in hospital.

Going to have easy pasta tea and then go babysitting. Hope they're not too late back, I'm done in.

She feels better now I have pointed out we have order a size 4 and have it taken in. Fml. Who would be a teen again?

Am so over prom already. As we were coming out of the place a young girl was ringing the bell to come in. Her mam had a pushchair and 3 other little kids. Looked very worn and beaten down. Was saying to the older of the other kids that she had no idea what they were doing there, the dd had arranged it and booked the appointment and she wouldn't be paying £100 for a bleeding frock. It wasn't a particularly posh place but the cheapest we saw was £200. So much pressure on the girls and their families.

I am seriously considering writing to school to change things for future years. It would be so easy to insist on jeans and a top or ask for donations from current year groups to help at least the fsm children. Or insist on a maximum spend. I saw quite a few families today and without being awful, some of them definitely couldn't afford to be spending the £200 plus. I know there are cheaper alternatives but at 15/16 you desperately want what your peers have. It was never a thing when I was growing up and we all managed perfectly well. And I think even in America its a 6th form thing not a year 11 thing.

Yes we never had a prom! Mind you we had loads of black tie dos at university so i guess if I'd had a dress that would have been handy. One from age 15 probably wouldn't have fit me at uni though. I agree it sounds like a lot of pressure. I'd have hated it at 16 tbh - i just wanted to sink into the floor most of the time.

Fucksake, frlend's ds3 is being a horror. Won't go to bed, won't let me put his pyjamas on, shouting and yelling in my face, coming downstairs, puts his hands over his ears and says "I'm not listening" when i try to read him a story. Bit pissed off tbh. She babysits for me but the kids are in bed by the time she gets there and don't come down. In any case even if they tried it on a bit they would not take it that far. The older 2 were grand but i am not really sure what to do. I have done my most scary voice and he's still not in bed.

What a horror Longest!! Did you tell his parents? I’d have got a royal roasting for playing up for a babysitter. I once babysat for a girl who was such a brat, naughty, actually ripped my dress, that I had to get my mum to come and help (I think I was about 16, but with plenty of babysitting experience).
When her parents got home, her dad - a domineering naval captain type - insisted she couldn’t have been that bad, and gave us a fiver between us.
The next day her mum came round, hugely apologetic and gave me money to repair my dress and a bit extra for the inconvenience. She made the girl write an apology too.
That dad was such an arse. I never babysat for them again!

I gave them an edited version - they were late back and v apologetic about that, but I don't mind that so much if I can be dozing on their sofa. I got him settled in the end, by being a bit shouty far firmer than I was really comfortable with, but at midnight he started crying and I went in and he was still sitting up refusing to lie down, and I am not wholly convinced he was asleep at all, but he was more upset than angry by then so we had a rocky cuddle till his parents got home at 1. But a bit miffed - I used to babysit for tricky kids back in the day but I was being paid! This is a favour swap but my kids are actually easy at night. Is just the daytime they're pitas!

God, other people’s children Longest, urgh!

We had a lovely evening and I slept until 10.30 this morning. No plans today so that’s nice. Will be AF although there is a cold bottle of Muscadet open in the fridge so maybe not...

Arrgghh longest that would drive me mad. Wonder if he's maybe coming down with something? Ds is a horror when he's brewing something.

Off out this afternoon, am driving so will be dry though. It's my nephews 15th birthday party, big family meal at local softplay hell pub. Will be absolute carnage, think there is about 40 of us altogether with kids from age 1 through to 21. Aresehole sil now decided she's going as well ffs. Haven't spoken to her since we fell out before Christmas. Am not alone though, other sister not spoken to her for over 6 months.

Still sat in my pjs lol, have been doing housework and pottering all morning. Going to have a nice long bath and then get ready. Place we are going isn't the best for food but it's nice not to have to cook on a sunday. Dh not coming, he's going to get himself a curry later.

Will be dry at least. Must do better this week, moderated last week with 1 or 2 drinks every night but I want a good stint of AF this week. Might even challenge myself to get 5 days in.

I’ll join you on a 5 day challenge Frouby. Straightedge from here to Friday?
I’m still in my PJs too. Have been in a real slump all weekend but managing small achievements. I went to see David Copperfield with my mum last night. It was really good. I did have a sneaky nap in the cinema but I caught most of it 😂

I'll join you guys, though may start tomorrow, as I'm having my delayed Saturday night tonight. Dh is starting his keto diet tomorrow so i won't have a drinking buddy. Bit worried about that! Just been for a walk with dc (bit moany) and outdoor swim without them (lovely) so feeling more settled. Going to find them in the park and i have piano later.

Longest I thought your DH was on the fodmap diet? Has he changed now? I'm joining you in the Saturday night tonight, I didn't drink last night because I was driving. Good that you got a swim in, what temperature is your outdoor pool out of interest?
NC4 That's a film I'd like to see but not sure it will come out in France. We went to see 1917 last week which was good, even DS (13) who really didn't want to go enjoyed it, I think because the way it is shot is like being in a video game.
Frouby I'll join you for 4 nights from tomorrow.
Not done much today, only a 12km run this morning and actually sat down and played the piano for an hour. I just wish I played as well as I did when I was 16 but its my own fault, I prefer sport now.

Yes he is at the moment Mme but gis ME specialist has suggested this. Science behind it is quite interesting but experimenttal as far as ME goes. Worth a try though eh? Am wondering about doing a milder version myself as low GI suited me but i think it's a bit all or nothing.

Pool is 23ish degrees. Feels pretty warm when swimming, though is chilly for messing about- kids not allowed back in till May. Lots of people rave about the Hampstead ponds which i may give a whirl but the lido is cleaner, warmer and nearer which tends to win out.

Am still in awe of your running. I have no particular ambition to improve on my regular park running but I'm glad to be keeping it up. Also piano - i am learning but it's slow progress. Like you say though, it's my own fault, i am worse than dd1 for practising. I used to do it when i had a rare few mins to myself but tend to go for the swimming if i can, and reading if i am stuck in the house, as a preference these days. Still, my teacher is lovely and it gets me out of Sunday teatime, which is a win.

More terrorism in South London. Quite a few of my colleagues live in Streatham - in fact that's where friends went while i was babysitting. Bit close to home. Has spurred me on to have another look at that Edinburgh application.

Dsis has offered to take kids for a weekend so i can take dh away for his 40th. Considering Edinburgh actually, or maybe Paris, but think i prefer the idea of a cosy weekend by the sea so may do Northumberland instead.

Glad you enjoyed the cinema NC4. Is it a regular thing going with your mum? Nice idea.

Yay for more 4/5 dayers. I definitely need to cut back again. It's so hard when the weather is rubbish though, and there isn't much to do after school.

Good job I was stone cold sober this afternoon though. Was at 15 yr old nephews party. Arsehole sil and brother there, we fell out before Christmas. Or rather sil fell out with me (she takes offence very easily but has no problem with giving it out 🙈). Anyhow, just about to sing happy birthday and brother collared me, said I must apologise to sil as I am causing a family rift and he doesn't like it. I said it's not the time nor the place to discuss anything, he persisted and started shouting at me. I walked away and sang happy birthday. He came back over, and was still dictating so I walked away again and told him to phone me and discuss it. He said he wanted to do it now and face to face. Said no and walked away again and sat back down, with my mum and 15 year old dd. He again followed me, pushing past everyone and shouted in my face. Dmum who never says anything shouted at him to shut up.

Really proud of myself for not biting back and walking away. There were kids and elderly aunts and everyone everywhere and it was the right thing to do. But I soooooo wanted to right royally tell him (and sil) to right royally go fuck themselves. He really lost it though, made himself look a right wankerbastard. He will very much be on the shitlist, he really upset my mam and my dd was upset too. Have actually never seen him like that and we've always gotten on well. But he's very much Golden Balls, the only boy out of 6, doted on and spoilt by his dad and my mam panders to him and sil as she is worried about seeing the kids. He won't have liked me saying he was in the wrong and sil and that I wouldn't be apologising to anyone as I had not done anything wrong.

Surprisingly I have got home and made myself a cuppa, much as I really wanted a big fat gin.

Haven't seen the news re terrorism, so frightening for everyone.

I'm waiting for the lake to warm up before I start some outdoor swimming. It's between 10-14 degrees at the moment apparently and only the very hardened swimmers are in. Bit too fresh for me to even contemplate kayaking though dd has been dragonboating all winter. Me and ds waiting for spring.

Frouby how awful with the family stuff and your brother. I'm really impressed you didn't give in to gin after that. I'm very happy to live a long way from all my family. My brother is usually goldenballs, he takes my DM on holiday and posts endless photos on FB of her (she pays), but he hasn't once phoned either her or my dad to find out how she is since she was rushed to hospital.
Longest definitely look at moving. My brother's ex wife and 4 kids live just off Streatham high st. I hope they are all OK. If I were you I'd move sooner rather than later as it will be easier for your DDs. I've never regretted moving to France, it was hard at first I suppose, but I just got on with it. I feel like a foreigner when I go to the UK now after 18 years away. It has changed a lot.

It was awful Madame and so unnecessary and inappropriate at a kids birthday party with everyone there. My dsis whose birthday it was just phoned to see if I was ok and thank me for trying to walk away. She hadn't even invited them, she fell out with them months ago. She had invited their dd so she wasn't left out and my other dsis was supposed to be picking her up, but they announced this morning they were coming too. So we think it was prearranged that he would cause a scene as he waited until everyone was gathered around to sing happy birthday.

I just feel awful for my mum mainly, and my little niece who loves us all. I am hoping it will all blow over or he will realise what a dick he's being but I am not holding my breath. Makes things awkward for everyone else when there is a party or anything. Sigh.

Mind you he really showed his true colours tonight so he gets the Uncle Knobhead tshirt for a bit. It's usually my bil that gets that 😂😂😂

Im not AF, drank the white in the fridge, never mind.

Frouby, that sounds horrible, what a nasty thing to happen. Well done for keeping your cool.

Longest, go for it, good luck.

Dd is hassling us to be allowed to go to a festival, we are not keen so saying no for now but she is badgering us, sigh. Have hardly spent any time with dh this weekend so I’m a bit grumpy about that but it could also be hormones as no period and that’s 7 weeks now so probably menopause. If it is I’m a bit scared awaiting other symptoms.