Wankerbastards will upset us that try, but we will still be dry. Or dryer at a push. It's a good job we are not in a rush.

[Frouby]

Thread 6 for the Tryers to be Dryers.

Support thread for reducing alcohol, stopping alcohol, monitoring alcohol. All welcome, absolutely no judgement. Whatever your aims with alcohol come and join us here. Lots of swearing but no judging or criticising.

Previous threads dotted around but can never do clicky links.

Big love and hugs to you all x

Flossie, I want that for your dd so badly!

Well done on navigating ds. Perhaps he's maturing?

DH, well, yes he understands on one level, and we had a good heart to heart today. Of course you get only my side of the story and there are probably some things to say in his defence, not least that he is trying to address his moods by increasing his sertraline dose and there is a transition period where you actually feel worse. And he doesn't manage work very well either. He's on reduced hours but even so has sick days - Monday when we rowed was such a day and he spent all day in bed till he got up and we had flaming row.

And yet. I think he could do more, obviously, hence the rows. Whether I'm right or not I don't know. We agreed to cut each other some mutual slack though. Wish us luck. I don't want this thing to beat us. We have always been a bit quick to row, if I am honest, probably as a result of his SEN, but I have never felt dragged down by it in this way.

Awwww so much sadness in here today. We should all arrange a fuck it night when we just get pissed together, press that fuvk it button and invite Swampy round.

I think that the world has always been sad. I remember when I was younger it was Gulf Wars and Saddam Hussein. Then the twin towers. Greenhouse gasses came before plastic and before that it was acid rain. Band aid and famine and various civil wars, Sarajevo, Kosovo etc. Before we had austerity it was the miners strikes and the impact of that especially in the North.

There will always be sadness and worry and upset. All we can do as individuals is the best we can. We can't change the world as much as we want to, its all a bit fucked.

But its less fucked now than it used to be I think. Medical science we mean can cure or prevent so much, sadly not everything but lots of things we would have worried about even 80 or 90 years like measles and small pox and scarlet fever are more or less gone now.

And everyone is so busy working we forget that our nans would have had twin tubs at best no central heating, coal fires. No ready meals or takeaways. Not able to work and have a family.

Am very glass half full today, sorry. But we do have it quite good, in comparison to the past.

My glass is full of water tonight after 2 becks blue. Didn't even fancy a drink, think I must be sickening for something. Am enjoying my more sober nights even though I rarely got drunk. Am sleeping really well and ploughing through a fuckton of work so it definitely has its positives.

Having said that I am looking forward to a few gins tomorrow because Friday.

Frouby you are absolutely right in everything you say. You really are. Life is good and I’m so grateful. Well done on your af. You are inspirational 💕

I'm so sorry some of you aren't feeling great. Life is like that, good and bad times, I hope things get better for everyone not in a good place. I'm very lucky and even though it is raining incessantly I'm still enjoyig running and cycling because the countryside is so beautiful at the moment.

Longest from what you post you sound like a great mum, please don't beat yourself up. And you are very patient with your DH.

NC4 you cope wonderfully with 2 DS as a single mum, one DS is more than enough for me and his big sister helps enormously.
I hope your mult vits do the trick. I have the florescent pee too, it generally means that you are peeing out all the vitamins your body doesn't need. In my case, most of them!

Flossie you are brilliant for coping as you do with DD's illness
I'm in awe.

Sense if the spark has gone then ditch him, you will fine it with someone

Dion I hope you are enjoying your gin!

Frouby I have a hen problem, one of my 2 hens has decided to brood, she keeps taking the eggs of my other hen to sit on. So I don't have any eggs. Do I just let nature take it's course? She has never been near a cock. As in cockerel. So it's just hormonal.

You see, even hens have their problems.

Not AF this week, but 1 glass Monday and Tuesday, 2 Wednesday and tonight half a bottle. Not exactly great moderation but I enjoyed them!

madame my little banty does this, she isa pita as she goes for me when I collect the eggs. They aren't hers either and I don't want chicks as I have 6 good layers.

You need to break her broody because she will stop eating and drinking enough and they can sit for weeks. And 1 can set the other off as well.

I always take all the eggs out each day. Immediately if you are around to hear an egg song. Then lift her out the nesting box and if possible shut her out. If not chuck something nice like sardines or sweetcorn to keep her more interested in outside than on the eggs. Do that as many times asyou can a day.

If that doesn't work you need to shut her somewhere without bedding. I have a spare hen coop I used last summer. Or a dog crate raised on bricks apparently works as well with a brush handle poked through for a perch.

What sort of hen is she? Some make really good mums and a little brood would be nice maybe? You can buy fertile eggs for her. If you do though be prepared to dispatch the cockerills, maybe keep 1? Rhode island reds are a good breed, both for laying and eating if you could. And marrons I think it is are large dual purpose birds.

I would actually prefer to raise then eat my own chooks as I do think they get a raw deal being commercially farmed but I don't know if I have the bottle for it.

I'd end up with a load of cock lodgers 😂😂😂

Cock lodgers 😂😂. That’s the quote of the day 😂😂

Oh and frouby....your idea of us all having a fuck it night with swampy sounds amazing!! OMG let’s organise it!! Let’s have a night on the gin together. Last time it involves swampy, was hilarious 😂

Lol at cock lodgers and chickens having problems.

You are right Frouby. The rise of the far right and catastrophic climate change do keep me awake at night but I keep reminding myself that progress is not linear and we can still strive for a better world (as long as it doesn't crash and die before we get there).

Have been re-reading Camus. He pretty much says the same as you, wise soul that you are. Life is chaotic and Godless but the answer is not suicide, it's revolt, and we can take derive heart and meaning from the struggle.

I think you should post on the Relationships board about your hen Madame. They're full of good advice over there.

Longest, I've taken to ignoring the news, which isn't ideal in my line of work, but it makes me feel helpless and angry. I did do a little happy dance at seeing Esther McVeigh out of the running for PM. Then I remembered Boris is the front runner.

I'm only just finishing work which is ridiculous. I did go to the gym for an hour and didn't do any exercise - just a bit of goal setting, but still. I'm probably slower than usual. I've earned my money today. I might afford myself the luxury of a sick day tomorrow.

My mind is turning to kittens. DCat has a little friend who lives over the road, but she put her house up for sale today. The neighbour, not the cat. I think he'll miss his little buddy, so I'm wondering if it might be time to add to my brood. It's like deciding on a second baby - how can I love another one as much as I love him? What if he's jealous?
But....kittens!!

Speaking of which - how are yours Madame?

Flossie count me in on a gin night with Swampy. Day six here. I'm going to crack at the weekend, I reckon.

Ugh. Total fail again. Not a good week for being booze free.

The hen stuff is very interesting!

Oh no. DS2 again. Says he’s ill, but he’s no physical symptoms. Just feels sick. So absolutely refusing to go to school.
I really need him to. This boy is going to break me.

Hi all. Just catching up. I haven’t got much time as I have a shed-load of housework to do.

I try not to watch the news and prefer to bury my head in the sand to protect my mental health. Not great I know but I feel I know enough to get by without the constant bombardment of doom and gloom.

Been a total failure this week with not even one dry day. Shared a bottle of wine every night with DH. Feeling fat and not very pleased with myself. Got things on this weekend so going to try again on Monday with AF days. Got hols in 6 weeks so need to lose a few pounds.

Hugs all round to anyone feeling sad or struggling.

@ NC4Now - thank you, will give them a try

Frouby - you are an inspiration

Day 5 AF today so feeling pretty proud of myself but still feeling tired & woke up with a headache which is unusual for me (even with as hangover)
Aiming for an AF night tonight as I have early morning yoga in the park tomorrow if the weather holds
Hope everyone has a good Friday

And thank you for saying I cope well with my boys Madame. I don’t always feel like I do!
I called in the big guns this morning and Rang Dad. They know it is serious if I get their dad involved. He wasn’t very supportive when they were little so I took to just getting on with it myself, but he’s been more interested since he got married.
He said he’d come and take DS to school himself if he wasn’t there by 9.30, and as he lives an hour away that’s quite a big effort for him to go to.
Luckily it didn’t come to that, but I spoke to him later and he said ‘it’s not just words, I’d do that’ which was just the biggest relief ever. What a difference 13 years makes.

Day five Hippy - that’s brilliant! Shame about the headache though. Hope it lifts soon.

Flying by...PMSL at Cock lodgers Frouby

NC4, Day 6? I am speechless. Glad you got DS2 to school and that his dad was willing to do his bit.

I'm up for a gin night with Swampy and all of you .

Could have been worse last night as Gin Friend and I both have bad colds, so were more restrained than we would otherwise have been.

Flossie, fingers crossed for you and DS. Mine will be back at some point, and it will involve re-negotiating boundaries as he tries to rule the roost.

Longest, I"m glad you have had a heart to heart with DH. It's so hard for both of you.

More will follow. Waving to all.

Can I confess that I really do not like gin? Or spirits in general. Swampy can have my share and I'll have his wine and beer.

Have been to deepest South London to meet old friend with new baby which was really nice. Now on way back for meeting about dd2 starting school [shocked].

Anyone doing anything nice this weekend? DM is coming but not till tomorrow afternoon. She is going to take dd2 for post birthday treat while I take dd1 to science fair thingy. Not sure how wise that is but I can always go and rescue them. I am also being trained on outdoor pizza oven for woodcraft folk so we will all go and eat results. Am also going to fully appreciate having a bed, bathroom and walls because I am camping the next two weekends [shocked]. Is Father's Day. Have not made any real plans but will probably go out for tea, though that probably means missing piano.

NC4, I am really pleased your Ds's dad stepped up. Must feel good to have an ally.

Frouby, check you out. You have this cracked, don't abandon us now you're all sorted!

Dion, well done for moderating with friend. Sometimes I find the fuck it button is even easier to press when I feel shit anyway.

It really does help to have an ally Longest. It’s a new thing really, but one I plan to utilise.
I’m not sure I’ll even fancy drinking tonight. It’s bonkers. I’ve not been like this for years.

Outdoor pizza oven will be ace. I was chatting to a bloke on Tinder recently who has an outdoor pizza oven and a house in Italy who makes his own pizzas. He seemed really nice actually - the first person with any potential for ages - but being a div I got bogged down with life stuff and didn’t reply to his message and then he left. Gutted.
A man who makes me pizza is pretty much the dream 😃

Afternoon all.

Glad you got some support NC that's got to be a comfort. Also 6 days 😮. That's amazingly amazing.

Been doing casinos since 9.15 this morning. Why people do this shit for fun is beyond me, it's so fucking boring. It feels like I have been sat here for days.

Won't be dry tonight, I have a bottle of wine in the fridge for later and I might even have a can of lager later as well. Have worked all bloody week and definetly have that friday feeling.

We are going kayaking in the morning and that's about as far as I have plans wise. Ponies at some point, and allotment. Am taking monday off so am only going to do minimal housework as well this weekend. Have decided doing 5 days is too much. It's profitable but I need a better balance I think.

it's our weekend to have DSS so will be doing some sort of Fathers Day lunch on Sunday I expect.

DH will want to BBQ all weekend which is great but I really want to test myself to do a week AF, mostly to see if I can. I'm almost there, just have to last until Monday but the Friday feeling is here & BBQ'ing will be a trigger.

Early morning yoga in the park tomorrow so that will help AF tonight.

enjoy your weekend all however you are spending it

I find five days a push Frouby. I’ll do it if I’m skint but four is much more manageable.
I’m actually feeling loads better for taking today off. This morning I was practically on my knees crying with lurgy and stress. Now I’ve had a day to rest and DS1 has done the downstairs, I feel like I can cope a bit more.
BBQs are a huge trigger for me too Hippy. Have you got the weather for it? It’s briefly stopped raining here but not enough for me to confidently light the barbie.

Yes I do 4 days compressed into 3.5, give or take. Can't really see myself working full time ever again out of choice, though pay freezes and Dh health may force my hand. I would probably sell up and move somewhere more affordable first though if I am honest, which I know full well is a wanky Londoner thing to say. Sometimes I do wonder what I am doing slogging it out here when the house is worth a fair bit more than I paid for it, but i've lived round here my whole adult life so it's home really, and I am easily bored so it suits me to have lots going on. It's my back pocket escape plan though if things get too tough.

NC4, Hippy, wowsers, we are smashing it out of the park with the moderating going on now. I am not pulling my weight I am afraid. Only managed 2 AF days this week, and one of those involved a half cup of prosecco, though I have stuck to my 1/2 bottle limit.