Wankerbastards will upset us that try, but we will still be dry. Or dryer at a push. It's a good job we are not in a rush.

[Frouby]

Thread 6 for the Tryers to be Dryers.

Support thread for reducing alcohol, stopping alcohol, monitoring alcohol. All welcome, absolutely no judgement. Whatever your aims with alcohol come and join us here. Lots of swearing but no judging or criticising.

Previous threads dotted around but can never do clicky links.

thanks Flossie44 for the welcome.

Tonight I have planned a very early night so a big mug of hot chocolate will be my choice of drink. Tomorrow night will be harder as i'll be cooking & that's almost always done with some wine

@ MadameForest - thanks for the welcome, I don't want to give up completely but need a bit more moderation so i'd like to try to do 1 week dry starting from today just to test myself a little

Welcome Hippy you are in the right place for moderation, I didn't and couldn't do teetotal, but me managing the drink rather than the drink managing me is what I wanted to achieve.

flossie my weight fluctuates during the day, I am currently 2lb lighter than when I got up. I think I retain a lot of water as well and tend to drink a couple of pints of water from evening to night time so I pee it off during the day. Weight yourself at teatime and I bet it has come down a bit.

I have got fatclub tonight so hoping that 2lb stays off.

Madame - licking testicles 🤐

Frouby - good luck tonight at fat club

Right i'm back on day 1 again today. I got through almost 2 bottles of red last night and I absolutely hate myself.

I can go a week without drinking, I just can't drink in moderation. Twice in the last fortnight i've gotten into a falling over state, and i'm sick of myself. I'm getting married next year and I do not want ot be a slurring bride with wine all down her dress.

Back on the wagon.

I'm on day 1. Scales told me the damage this morning. So I'm going for 4 days this week, hopefully 5. Saturday is no way as I've booked a babysitter

Flossie and Dionysa - I’m joining you for 2 days AF. Let’s do this!

Flossie my thoughts are turning the same way as yours about tonight. FML. There's going to have to be a lot of hand-holding on here, what with you and me and Longest and Madame and Money and Cotton and Hippy all on Day One.

BTW, welcome, Hippy. It's very striking that we all say pretty much the same thing.

I will confess now (before wine) that I don't mind a bit of testicle-licking, either. Sorry, Flossie. 😷

And you too, Canshop. Another one!

Just had almighty row with DH. I threatened divorce. Cumulated in lots of hugs and crying but interrupted by necessity of school run. Just fed up of feeling like I have to treat every little request like it's an imposition. I wouldn't mind if he said he'd love to help but can't manage it, but I can't cope with having my head bitten off for having the audacity to ask. He says most of this is going on in my head but apologised for how he acted yesterday and for not being able to hide how he feels. Genuinely don't know if I can be dry after today but will see.

Also next door has been broken into and I think I saw the guy, and he saw me clocking him. Didn't realise he was casing the houses, just thought he was ringing bells touting for work. Have to give report to police, and feel bad I didn't do anything to stop him. Shit day altogether really.

Oh longest, you poor thing. Sounds horrid day!! What did dh say when you challenged him?? You can’t do it all lovely. You need support. 💐

Dion - I’d need a vat of gin and wine cocktails to ENJOY licking testicles!!

We both said lots of things, some friendlier than others. Have agreed to discuss over glass of wine. Sorry. Goods intentions have gone awry again.

I feel useless as some of you are solo parenting and coping way better than me.

Oh god sorry for your shit day longest. I’m on my phone so don’t have a good view on all the many folk on a Monday AF Me too though I’m stuck in a hotel (nothing fun just work) by myself in a place with zero booze so it’s not really an achievement
Madam I don’t exercise and am skinny, I’m not inactive as I walk around a fair bit, that burns bugger all calories. I am prone to a thick waist if I eat a lot of carbs which was never the case when I was younger and since my youngest ate my boobs that lends to a lovely straight up and down effect. flossie I agree with Madam I have a whole 2 kg appear and disappear randomly.

X-post longest fair enough. Sometimes plans need to change.

Ah longest, big unmumsnetty hugs. I find it easier coping with the dcs and house and everything without DH around, he makes more mess, causes more work and needs more attention than the dcs put together.

You also expect support when there is another adult around, and get frustrated when it doesn't happen which makes the jobs seem harder. Dh has had a couple of spells of ill health and I couldn't cope with him full time being ill. Really tell him how you feel tonight, spell it out to him how it makes you feel.

Lost 2lb at fat club, that's over 2 weeks though but am happy with that. Takes my official loss to 9lbs and down into the next stone bracket which also makes you feel better.

And have just declined a celebratory gin, win win for me!

for you frouby

Longest hugs for you, and don't be hard on yourself, I think you have an awful lot to put up with looking after your DH due to his ill health, as well as the children. I would find it very hard to cope with an ill OH as so far I've blessed with very good health so find illness difficult to understand. As a solo parent it can be tough, but you do things your way, so even though it's hard there is no dispute over the way to bring the DC up.
Frouby 9lbs great stuff! And as you say, so nice to get down to the next number. I only use kgs now and it's easier that way!
Leaving you are very lucky, or maybe you don't eat as much as me. I think I have fat genes as my paternal grandmother and my aunt were and are obese.

Wow frouby amazing!! ⭐️. Bet you feel incredible!!

I’ve got dd1’s friend over. They’re so bloody loud and excitable. Supposed to be revising for an exam tomorrow. Not sure why that needs screams of laughter and banging on walls etc.
Dd2 did water sports with school this pm. She did incredibly. So proud of her. But she’s knackered now and already in bed!!

And I’m now getting into the ‘fuck it, I’m having wine’ territory!! Really struggling now. Really want one!! Ffs!!

Longest - as the others have said, you really do amazingly. To have a poorly husband is such a drain. I remember when dh had pneumonia..I had to put the dogs in kennels cos I couldn’t cope with them, the kids and dh demanding my attention. I can only imagine how you feel on a long term basis. Sending you massive hugs.

Madame - you are so fit. I’d love to be like that.

Leaving - Id still call that an achievement. I’d have packed wine in my bag ‘just in case’!! . So I’d call that a win!!

🌟 🌟🌟🌟FROUBY🌟🌟🌟🌟
Well done you!
WTAS Longest. Solo parenting is easier than looking after another adult, who you signed up as a sidekick. I think you do incredibly - working, looking after the family, always on the go. I hope today’s busy up has cleared the air with DH a bit.
As for the neighbours - unless he was wearing an eye mask and carrying a swag bag, how could you have known he was casing the joint?

I very rarely lose my rag with the kids but DS1 got both barrels today. I’ve been working since 8am, he’s been off college. I asked him to wash up before he came to meet me at lunchtime, so I could take his phone to the shop and give him bus money to go to my mum’s (who would inevitability pay him handsomely for cutting her grass).
Only he didn’t do the kitchen, so I get in tired, full of lurgy, to a tip of a kitchen with more work still to do, a meal to prepare, and did I mention lurgy?

The good thing about being relatively calm and non-shouty is when you lose your shit they know you mean it.

Good luck all you Day Oners. Day two should be fairly easy for me as I’ll be heading to bed after tea to —sulk— recouperate.

Thank you guys. I suppose that's the stage I have reached - where it feels like it'd be much easier not to have to take his wishes into account or put up with his moods. But the kids would be devastated and I know I would miss him more than I think right now - we do have fun times. And anyway I would never get to escape the DC and go for a swim or night out with pals if I was solo parenting. I have made my bed but it feels like a bit of an endurance test than a marriage sometimes. We will make up and I will feel better tomorrow. In the meantime wine calls, as much as it shames me to say.

I wish I could say I rarely lose my rag NC4. It has bugger all impact is the best I can say about it.

Flossie yay re dd2 and woo you for coping with dd1 and raucous pal.

(((((Longest)))))

It’s really hard for you. I hope you feel better tomorrow.

I’m feeling really sorry for myself. I haven’t been poorly since I moved in here last year, which is lucky really, but I’d forgotten how crap it is being ill and still having to trudge through work and home stuff.

Oh big hugs NC4. And thank you, because you have reminded me that it is shit for DH too, he's not making this shit up and I'd be a nightmare to love with too if I permanently had to put on a brave face when ill.