New Year, New Start. Probably dries and lows as we Tryers to be Dryers try 2019.

[Frouby]

New thread for the New Year.

Support thread for those who want to moderate and reduce alcohol. Absolutely no judgement, just advice and support. Absolutely everyone is welcome whatever your goals or hopes for 2019.

Am no good at clicky linke but there are previous threads and we look forward to continuing to moderate and reduce in 2019.

Especially today. 14 coming for 3 courses at 3pm and I have a raging hangover to start the year. Fml.

Thanks Anglaise. There was another one about growing up with an alcoholic parent which I haven't read in full as a bit close to the bone (from both angles) but will try to. I usually don't drink on Sundays but yesterday I actually didn't particularly want to either, which is new. I am going swimming at lunchtime today and will attempt the park run again on Saturday, although my legs have been killing me since - will that get better quickly as it's going to be a bit debilitating if I can't walk all weekend!

I’ll have a read of the Guardian article later. I’ve been meaning to pitch something about alcohol and anxiety, but I think it would be better with first person insights and not sure I’m brave enough to bare my soul on this issue.
It’ll be interesting to see how another writer does it.

Thanks for the article, Anglaise. Very interesting. I also saw the one in the Telegraph while in Costa at the weekend - woman who gave up drinking because she didn't want her DC to see her drunk (her mother died an alcoholic, too). I'm really struggling with anxiety this morning, so the Guardian piece is very timely. Also woke up in the usual panic after 3 hrs sleep, so am feeling ill and shaky and generally awful now. I just don't know why I keep doing this. I know how awful it makes me feel.

NC4, that is exactly the kind of thing that my DC would do, if they were speaking to one another . Ugh.

Water - day 26??? I am lost for words.

Thanks. I've read it - very interesting. I have been sleeping better this month. I thought it was because Christmas was over but maybe....

I have also braved reading the other one I mentioned. The bit where the woman says that her mother's alcoholism didn't negate her being a good person and loving mother stood out for me. Other people's stories about growing up in an alcoholic household have never really resonated with me as my DM is not an angry drunk and I have never doubted her love and pride for me and the DC. Me and dsis never really wanted for anything and we have both done well educationally, but I did spend much of my adolescence comforting her when she was being drunk/weepy, putting her to bed etc and I look back with sadness at the waste of potential - of her own potential to have more satisfactory relationships mainly, but she's a clever woman with a big heart and she could have had an outstanding life if she hadn't given it to alcohol. Same with her twin dsis really.

I am not in that place but it's a slippery slope and I go a bit close to the edge sometimes. Why, when the risks are so obvious to me? My cousin (daughter of DM's twin dsis) is very active and outdoorsy and only occasionally drinks, though she's not teetotal. Dsis is much healthier than me too.

Longest well done on your park run. Your legs will be better tomorrow. Sport is my drug. I drank a bottle of wine Friday evening (problems with DP yet again) and felt shit on Saturday morning for my 15km run but it served me right.. I won't be doing that again in a hurry. Dehydration is horrible.

The sleep thing’s interesting. I always thought I slept better after a drink but my Fitbit has been quite revealing.
Sunday I drank way too much (see Monday sleep) and I had a bottle of wine on Thursday after parents evening (see Friday).
It seems it’s actually really bad for sleep.

Anglaise everything OK? I want to get back to getting a buzz from exercise. I actually loved my weights session on Sat and had a gorgeous walk to work this morning.
I’m in awe of anyone who can run though!

Thanks Anglaise. do you think if I do it once a week I'll get fitter/better able to cope, or will I need to practise in between? Just went for another outdoor swim. Was with a friend though so a bit leisurely. Lovely though. Really must get back to work though!

Epic fail - Having a hair of the dog. It was a toss up between the bottle of AF wine in the fridge or the opened bottle of Rioja on the side in the kitchen left over from yesterday. It seems I am powerless to resist it if it’s in the house I will aim to still do my 3 AF days by doing Tues to Thurs instead. Bollocks!

I am failing too. DH had a shit day and suggested wine and I am powerless to resist so I have opened it.not started yet but will do. Will be AF tomorrow instead.

NC I wish I could run, never been able to even when I was ultra fit and at the gym 4 or 5 times a week. I could do advanced aerobic classes, was brilliant at boxercise, could walk miles up hill on the treadmill at 4mph but I just can't run.

If anyone has seen that video of Doug the Pug, the little irish pug who just can't fecking run, that's me. I am Doug.

Hope you are OK Anglaise. Is the psychobitch ex causing problems again?

Dry here. Yay me. It was tense though. I feel rough today, think Ds shared his virusy, cold thing with me. Was up all night either peeing or coughing and I have a lovely viral rash coming on my chest which I always get when I am ill.

So I was going to have a Sloe Gin and ginger ale as a pick me up. But went to the shop for some bread and milk and by the time I got back it was 6pm so I knew I only had another hour to get through so powered on.

Currently having a horlicks, with my pjs and thick socks on and will be going to bed shortly.

Obviously because I have mentioned I don't feel 100% DH has full blown manflu. Didn't stop him drinking 5 cans though the lying twatbag.

That's 2 days dry though this week. I will probably have a drink tomorrow, got dds parents evening to get through and probably won't be home until 7ish. And if it snows I will need a fecking gin, dds school is up a hill.

Well done Frouby. You sound like me when it comes to running - I’m just not built for it and it buggers my knees. Hope you feel better soon.

Longest, I’ll be your AF buddy tomorrow.

But if it snows then the days are magically transformed into a Narnia type state whereby all rules are suspended and you get to drink brandy/rum/whisky in order to keep warm

So much niceness and intelligence on this thread.

Thank you for posting about your mum, Longest. You write about her beautifully, and with such generosity of spirit.

NC4, your screenshot is pretty graphic. I probably had about 3.5 hours of sleep last night. Finally dozed off again in time for the alarm to go off.

Have got through Day One, not least as I am hungover. I spent the first of the Witching Hours reading endless blogs on the Sober School website while DD did her prep. The woman who set the site up doesn't hold with moderation, but much of what she says resonates with me. Plus reading it filled in the time. Then we ate early (by my standards). So that is tonight pretty much dealt with. One night seems tolerable. It's the following nights that are so difficult.

Frouby, sorry about the virusy thing. Your DS evidently listened when you told him it's nice to share.

Canshop, we can do hand-holding tomorrow!

Anglaise, I'm really sorry that DP has been causing mischief. There is never a dull moment with these charismatic men. My problem is that I am too in thrall to the excitement, and drink as a way to reduce the anxiety. Though, as we all know, it actually increases it the next day.

Well done Dionysa - yes, defo be AF with you tomorrow.

Yep, I am Doug too. But I walked to work today and it was gorgeous. Really lifted the spirits. I’m hoping for a snowy walk later in the week.
I lost 1.5lbs at WW tonight too, so I’m celebrating with pizza... but no wine.

Fabulous pics, NC4!

Well I had some G&Ts at the weekend but managed to stay sober during the week. I can't pretend it isn't a struggle and on a Monday Friday seems a long way away! But I'm sleeping so much better, feeling less anxious, no racing heart at 3am and my moods feel more stable.
Had another loss at SW tonight so 9.5lbs down now in total....I. have stones to lose but it's a start and I don't want to be fat this summer (I've been fat for the past 10 so it really us time for a change!).
I'm so impressed at the dry for 20 + days peeps on here. Although I do feel like I've got my sh*t together, it's still v early days and I know how easy it is to revert back to a bottle of wine + daily.....
Let's keep on keeping on, folks

Longest if you can find time to run a couple more times in the week you will find it a lot easier. I started off running 5k every other day, then joined a running club - the coaches always say that you need to run 3 times a week to maintain and 4 times at least to progress. When you only run once or twice a week breathing as well as the leg muscles hurt so stitches can also be a problem. So if you can get out a couple more times a week I think you will find Park Runs a lot easier and more fun to do!
Frouby NC4 Well this evening a breakthrough with DP, his ex finally collected all her things and has accepted it is finished - I really think that is it now. I hope so. He has behaved badly towards both of us, he didn't want to hurt her as he loved her a lot. He loves me more and that is it now. I knew it would be complicated but didn't expect nearly 8 months of uncertainty.
Not dry tonight as celebrating at last, but only 2 glasses of wine so nothing terrible.

Anglaise i am really pleased for you! Enjoy your celebration.

Realistically I would find that sort of time commitment a struggle but will see. I am sharing an office with dsis now and she is a hearty outdoor type so may persuade me out for a lunchtime run, but then I would be the slowpoke holding her up.

Dionysa it wasn't so long ago you were saying 1 day was a struggle so take heart in your progress. We can do it!

Turns out moderation/abstinence is so much harder when you have someone else persuading you to be bad. Still, I have enjoy tonight and FX have stopped just short of being hungoverll.

Looks lovely NC4. Outdoor swimming was lovely too. Cold but properly sunny. The news talks of snow but the forecast looks more like boring sleet, boo.

Can shop I am with you!

Anglaise I'm glad he's finally severed ties with her

Dionysa well done on one day AF

Omg at chopping wood inside, I’d kill them!

Longest lurker, thats sad about your mum 💐

I read the anxiety article, makes sense. A psychiatrist I dated 25+ years ago told me that post alcoholic anxiety syndrome was a thing too.

Day 27 AF here, on the home strait now.

My aim for Feb and March is 3 AF days a week and moderating on others. Not sure if I’ll succeed though.

Am impressed by all the weight loss too. That's another thing I need to work on. I lost weight pretty easily when breastfeeding but am so cross at myself for piling it all back on, and some.

OMG NC4 thats some weapons grade sleep there! 10 hours, wow! 🙂

at weapons grade sleep! Fabulous work water!