Less booze. More AF days. But still a bit damp. Not dry jan, but not a soggy summer. Support thread for reducing alcohol.

[Frouby]

New thread in case the other fills up while I am busy this weekend.

Did I mention I get married tomorrow? 😁

Rubbish at clicky links but sure someone clever will be along to link the last thread.

This is a support thread for those wanting to reduce the amount you drink. There is no judgement on here. We are all struggling along with our own problems and lives and looking to cut down. You might only want a couple of weekends off. Or reduce the amount of days you drink. Or the amount you drink. Or both.

Whatever your starting point and whatever your goal come and join us for friendly chat and support.

Have I done it? Am I passivelyagressivelynotshagging?

I am! I so fucking am 😂😂

God. We need a night out. Can you imagine?

Welcome Notquite. Don't be put off by the silliness tonight. It only gets silly after 7pm, the rest of the time we are all sorry.

😂 god you are!! You are soooo passively aggressive not shagging 😂

And yes....give us 12 hours and we will all be very very sorry

Sooo not shagging. Ds is still bouncing around. Dd and her mate are still making pizza. DH is snoring so hasn't even noticed I am passivelyagressivelynotshagging. Which my predictive text actually does know now 😂

I’m glad your predictive text knows before dh.....always a good sign!! 😂😂

Morning all!

Thanks for the welcome . Yesterday I didn't drink and I am feeling a wee bit happpy about that. It is going to take a while (understatement of the century) but I need to make changes and stop just mindless drinking.
I have had a friend coming round tonight which has been planned for ages and I will have a couple of wine and sodas with her as planned but then my plan is to be alcohol free on Thursday .

I just want to stop the pointless every day reaching for a drink before I get to a stage where my liver tells me I have to.

I hope nobody is too sorry this morning. It looks like you enjoyed yourselves

Welcome howlong
Wow a lot of name changes last night, hard to keep up! I think I need to change mine to nofuckingwillpowerwhatsoever if that is still available. Not on the alcohol front but on cheating bastard front. Having managed a sex free Friday I saw him yesterday and having spent a chaste day together all day I invited him up to my bedroom and had rather a lot of passiveagressive sex. The problem is I'm in love and he is too (at least he says so and the way he is with me I actually think he is, there are some things you can't fake.
So last night I was bad on two counts, two glasses of wine when out (I'm usually AF in the week) and 2 hours of rather excellent sex. It just works between us I've never had chemistry like that with anyone before in my 52 years. He says the same. I will of course be a basket case at the weekend when he is with his girlfriend celebrating her birthday. Hopefully after that he will be able to gently finish things (I know I'm probably an idiot)

Hi all - joining you. Also on the Brave Babes.

Have drunk every evening for years and it's out of control. I can easily get through a bottle of wine and a gin and tonic per night.

It's causing me stress and costing me a fortune.

I didn't see the Adrian Chiles programme, but (I'm referring to the conversation a few posts down), I thought Frank Skinner was a recovering alcoholic who gave up drink years ago?

Howlong - well done on last night. And don’t beat yourself about tonight. You have taken the first step.

Anglais - I’m so glad you had fun with forest man. Remember to stay the strong independent woman he fell for. We will all be here for you this weekend. Then you can look ahead to next week and the future ahead.

Hamster - welcome. You sound like me. I struggle to have an AF day ever. And can easily drink a bottle a night.

Welcome Hamster yes, re Adrian Chiles thing, Frank is AF for 13 years now, but was telling Adrian he was probably fine (although Adrian drinking well into 3 figure units per week!) and that since being dry his social life had gone down the toilet! Anglais he probably knows how you feel after yesterday so I guess ball's in his court now and very worst scenario you have had some fabulous sexy time!! You're certainly no idiot and eyes wide open - hope it all works out well, you deserve it. Is everyone back to who they were now? I kept having to search back and forward last night to keep up!!

Back to my real self now, with not a courgette in sight. Wow - what a lot to catch up with on here. Trying to field a nag from DD about a hair appointment (because if we don't do it now, there won't be time before she goes back to school in a week's time ).

Will catch up properly later, but lovely to welcome some new people on here. And to hear Anglais's news...

Hi Hamster welcome and good luck.
Not sure the Adrian Chiles programme was very helpful in the end, certainly Frank Skinner saying he didn't have a problem and his social life had gone down the pan aren't very helpful comments, but it is true, socially things are different and anyone who has gone AF would probably say the same. Not necessarily bad, but different. Drunk people aren't interesting so going to parties isn't such great fun anymore.
Thanks all for your nice comments, I will try and stay strong and independent and make him laugh which is what he likes about me as well as the great chemistry. I forgot to say that the French contestant on the Great British Bakeoff Manon is the niece of Forest Man's girlfriend, so I can't even watch that without thinking about him if it does all go pear shaped!

Evening all.

Back to me again.

Had auntie up for PET scan, am knackered. Was up at 5am working, didn't sleep well last night then dashed around all day to get to hospital in time. Got home about 6.30pm.

Cousin has asked me if I will go with them next week to get results. Hoping and praying it's not as bad as we think. Asked auntie if she wanted me to go with them and she does so I can't say no.

Aunt feeling a bit better now the scan is over with. She says she hasn't googled but little things she has said makes me think she has. Nothing to do but wait now.

Anyway. Tonight is gin oclock. Only having 2 but very needed.

Thanks all

Hello everyone and ha ha ha at name changes

Frouby fingers crossed for your aunt

Day 37 AF here. Slightly stressed due to work and other boring shite and really would love some wine on Friday evening but I'm not going to. Sob!

Istr that Frank skinner has been sober for 30 years. I agree, his comments weren't helpful at all. I liked the programme though, laughed at Chiles lying on the bed getting stroppy with the drinkaware app

Yep, 30 years. Making my 37 days seem a bit poxy 😂

en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frank_Skinner

Frouby - god what a bloody awful day for you. Showing so much strength on moderating too. Sending hugs.

Anglais - just be yourself. That’s who he loves. And that’s who you are, a wonderful independent strong woman. I have such respect for you.

Dion - omg are you my clone?! We’ve both had to endure stationary shopping and now tomorrow I’ve been conned into dd1 having made an app at tony and guy for a hair cut!! Wtf?! I don’t even go to tony and bloody guy!! Fml

Water and lemon juice - 37 days is hardcore

As for me. Started SW today. Have not eaten off plan and proud of myself. Then ndn text inviting me for wine at 6pm. Wasn’t going to, then ds walked in and screamed what a vile mum I am and f-ing at me!! So I went next door ALONE and drank!! Heard dh’s car come home and down a glass (2nd glass) in one and went home!!!! Cooked dinner and had another glass!! Fml!! Can’t see me ever being able to do af right now!!

Why is it that I’ve got the taste of Sauvignon and just want to keep drinking it?!

Thing I’m going to have to put the kettle on and make a cuppa to stop the urge!!

I actually LOVE wine. That’s my problem!!

Frouby I hope you had a good night's sleep and feel better this morning. Well done on the only-2-gins. Ane everything crossed for your Auntie's results.
Flossie wine is lovely, that is the problem. Once you reach the menopause sleep is lovelier . Good luck with SW an old university friend of mine runs the St Neots one and I know she has loads of successes in her groups.
AF last night, apéro tonight so probably not. I'm driving so it will only be 2 glasses at most. Seeing FM today he spent the night with his GF so that will be interesting. I didn't mind that much and certainly had no urge to reach for the wine.

Anglais - that must’ve been so hard knowing forest man was with his girlfriend. How does that change chemistry when you see him in person? Or does it not? Hope today goes well

Anglaise you are more understanding than me. I couldn't do that. Do you really, actually love him? I couldn't cope with DH spending the night with another woman no matter what the circumstances. And would be raging. If you do love him be careful this doesn't become your new normal if that isn't what you want.

Had an epic kip and feel 100% better. Was absolutely bozeyed with tiredness yesterday.

Have also rung a local livery yard and left a message for them to call me back. The more I think about current yard owner asking for more money the more I am raging. She gets twice what everyone else pays from me. All year round and has done for the last 10 years. I never moan or cause a fuss. For her double money all she has to do is check mine twice a day for 7/8 months of the year and do the poo picking, and provide hay and straw over winter. It might not be the going rate for what I get but the yard is in need of lots of work. Fencing is a bloody mess. Every roof leaks. Gates sagging on their hinges. School is overgrown. No one paying what I pay would entertain it.

Hmmph. It will be a Big Thing moving. But I want them closer. Current yard is 20-30 minutes away. So like today if the dcs want ro ride it can be an hour round trip. They won't be able to ride after school come November.

There is a swanky DIY livery yard 5 minutes down the road. It might be too expensive or not have spaces but it doesn't hurt to ask I suppose.

Off to plot shortly with ds. Just done my VAT return.

Tonight will likely be wet. I might even put wine in the fridge.

Will be back once I have dealt with DD and yet another sodding Friendship Drama - but 30 years?!??!?!?!?! FML several times over.

I am back.

Notquite, if you have managed four days (for whatever reason), that is brilliant. I have yet to manage that. I think three is my maximum, and I am not able to do even one at the moment. I'm feeling very much like howlong and Hamster. Something in me really just has to click. And I'm a pretty obsessive person (gave up sugar and yeast completely about 20 years ago for health-related reasons, and managed that for three years. But I evidently haven't felt the real trigger yet where alcohol is concerned).

Anglaise (sorry to have missed your final 'e' off yesterday), all that said, I am now wondering about hypnotherapy (I remember you mentioned this upthread). You are such a bold, brave woman in every possible way. I would be absolutely paralytic if DP were with another girlfriend. It's bad enough when he doesn't tell me what he's doing, and I know for an absolute fact that he is not involved with anyone else and is just staking his 'independence' claim.

Frouby, I hope you sort out your livery problem. I have friends with ponies, and livery problems are always bubbling away in the background, one way or another. And, of course, I am thinking of your auntie.

Flossie, did the cup of tea do the trick? Am on my second large G&T here. DC driving me crazy. And DP. We spent the day in John Lewis, acting all married. Since when I have heard stuff all from him.

Water: 37 days?! I am in awe. Do you feel massively different now?

I feel awful, not least because of this bastarding cold (the only thing DS has shared with me all holidays, it would be fair to say).

Just quickly dropping in, be back later properly..

Frouby - hope you Ok today lovely. Awful day yest for you and today more stress. Sending love.

Dion - John Lewis has the ability to make any couple be all married as they walk round. How’s things with him??
Sympathise with cold. I’ve come back from France with head cold. In fact we all see to have. Obviously dh’s is worse!! Both dd’s too but with dd2 it’s a worry.

On a mahoosive g&t here. SW friendly obviously 😉

Flossie, I love wine too, really do.

Livery lady should be nicer to you I reckon, I'd move I reckon

Anglaise, eek at FM.

Day 38 here. Have stressful day tomorrow, big interview and really want the job. Will be hard tomorrow eve as I will want to drink but I'm not going to. I do feel better for it and look better. Dh says I look younger so that's an incentive too.