Husband's bad mood on holiday has made the whole trip miserable

[TheLizardQueen]

Holiday ruined 😡 Arrived in the Lake District on Friday. All going well until yesterday we went to explore. DH moaned and rolled his eyes all day making it not a nice experience. Same again today when we went out. Moaned at DD because there were shops she wanted to visit. Said he was going to wait in the car for us. Didn’t come into any shops and instead waited outside in a mood. Went for dinner as a treat. He said his meal was horrible (ours was great) complained about the table next to us talking too loud. Complained all the way home because DD sat in the front and played her music, which I don’t mind. DD can’t sit in the back due to windy roads and travel sickness. Then he told her she was making it all up because she wanted to sit in the front seat. I’m the driver btw, DH doesn’t drive. She was mad that he said she lies about having travel sickness. Then he told her to not talk to her for the rest of the holiday. She’s in her room alone. You can cut the atmosphere with a knife. Worst thing is we’re here with his parents (who I love) but his mum is taking his side in all this. Me and DD just want to go home. We’re walking on egg shells. I can’t even look at him, he thinks he’s done nothing wrong. Seriously thinking about my future now 😞 Been together 23 years. DD is 19 and still (usually) loves coming on holiday with us. I’m so sad 😞

FGS stop barking at OP. I'm sure she feels bad enough without you questioning her every 2 minutes.

He does work but I am also employed as well as running my own business so I earn more. He’s never wanted to drive, probably can’t be arsed to learn. We do own our house and have 5 years left on our mortgage. I am 54 and he is 50

@Famesick thank you. Yes we own our hose with 5 years left on the mortgage.

True!
OP please don’t minimise his behaviour, it’s time to be brave and let your daughter see who you can be!

@QueenStevie i called him Victor Meldrew today 😂

Step 1, seek some legal advice. You don’t have to alert him to your intentions until you are ready to take action.

He’s a miserable killjoy, can’t drive, earns very little, doesn’t ever join you on outings & takes his mardy arse behaviour out on DD too.

What positive qualities is he bringing to your life?

You need to firmly pull him up on his behaviour. Tell him he’s making everyone miserable and he either cheers up or he needs to leave and go home. Be forceful with him, stop just seething internally, pull him up on this shit.

And you earn much more than him
so I don’t get why you feel trapped
is you did going to uni?

If you only have 5 years left on the mortgage, then you must have quite a bit of equity. Tell him you’re divorcing him and sell the house.

You could contact a solicitor when you get back home, OP. This guy is awful, a nasty bully.

Jesus what a fun sponge. He sounds draining.

I would see a solicitor when you get home. Your mortgage is nearly paid off so you have an asset to sell and buy your own peaceful place.

Have to start looking at University options for my daughter for next year.

His parents were on holiday with you

How do they respond to witnessing all this?

As others have said keep your cards close and seek legal advice on your return.
If you’re serious about starting a new life put all your plans in place before you tell him anything.
Be prepared that he will certainly turn even nastier but you can have a better life for you and your daughter - be brave OP, you can do this.

I think you should keep it this way. Just make your own plans with your DD and leave this joy thief / man-child to his own devices. His mother can keep him company.

This is the sunk cost fallacy. The longer you wait it out the more expensive it will get for you.

Pee off?? You want a pee off? I've heard of a dance off but never a pee off... how strange 😂

You got it! Pee off 🤭

Not your problem!!

Get a life Op before it's too late 😒

OP has another 20+ years of this. What if she becomes a grand mother. Is fun sponge going to sit at home complaining? These years don't come back. Her daughter will hopefully move on in her life and what parent wouldn't want to be part of the journey. I doubt he will.

Is your daughter off to uni in September? Or working?

Talk to him, ask him what he wanted out of the holiday and does he think he can salvage it. Don’t pretend all is ok. I always disagree with the ltb- talk first, see what’s happening, or what’s happened- maybe he’s freaking out over money, maybe he’s not feeling well, maybe it’s a work thing, maybe it is all over but you’ve both put enough years in to figure out where it all went wrong and if you love each other